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No huge movie trailers this week, you guys. Pretty small bore stuff. There’s a new Resident Evil movie coming out, I guess? Are you excited about that? But just because there aren’t any HUGE trailers doesn’t mean you shouldn’t watch these trailers! There are actually a couple of interesting looking things coming out soon. Very 1990s. Very Todd Solondz. Very Requiem for a Dream. (Requiem for a Dream came out in 2000, but maybe that makes it the MOST ’90s of all?) OK, here we go:
Detachment
Hey, wait, this looks pretty good! The trailer started and I was like, oh lord HERE WE GO, but then the trailer kept going and it turns out that it looks good. My posse don’t do homework.
Sassy Pants
We could talk about whether or not this movie looks good and whether or not we think we might see it, but there’s clearly a much more pressing issue, which is: UH, DID YOU SEE HALEY JOEL OSMENT IN THIS THING?! WHUUUUUUT?!
Side By Side
“Don’t hold me to it, Keanu,” is the quote of the day. I’m kind of full up on masturbatory documentaries about how movies are going to be different now because there is the Internet (and I don’t believe that the whole thing is democratized even a little bit, GEORGE LUCAS) but even if that weren’t the case, the hell if I need to hear the director of the Spy Kids franchise talk about his dedication to “advancing the art.” In a movie directed by Keanu Reeves? Goodnight!
Resident Evil: Retribution
Whatever! That is what every single review of this movie will say. “Sure, whatever.” – Roger Ebert.
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Seems you neglected one film, FDR: American Badass!. With Kevin Sorbo as Lincoln!
#1 more like Adrian Brooding….
#2 kinda looks like it could be funny, but I was really disappointed that it wasn’t 2 minutes on the Freddy Roach doc that was advertised before it…THAT’S going to be great, i can tell.
#3 that’s gotta be what? 68 minutes long? eh. i’ll have it on in the background while cleaning when it’s on Netflix….maybe. don’t hold me to it, Keanu.
Sure, whatevaarrrr
I give the cast for Detachment an A+. Holy carp.
At least there were cameos from Skyler and Walter White. What happened to Sixth Sense’s head?
Anyone else notice that the Resident Evil: Retribution trailer used Daft Punk’s Tron: Legacy soundtrack? How tacky! (Not at all calling Daft Punk and/or Tron tacky)
What are they even Resident Eviling in this one anyway? Lycanthrope zombie helicopters?
Detachment has Clay Davis in it!
The only logical response to that is sheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet
Whoa, Tony Kaye finally got to make another movie? And Adrien Brody finally got to make another movie that looks like it might not suck? Mind = blown.
Sometimes I’m bad at hearing, but did Adrien Brody say his name is “Mr. Barf”?
Seiously, nobody else is gonna go BONKERS over that HJO-BOMB that the Sassy Pants trailer dropped on the second half? Holy shit, I swear I almost got fired.
Side By Side looks amazing. My favorite filmmakers sit around and discuss filmmaking? Sign me up. The only thing about it that’s going to be “masturbatory” is me in the theater while watching it.