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This is pretty exciting news! Werner Herzog has been cast as the villain in the upcoming Tom Cruise movie One Shot, based on the book by Lee Child! Werner Herzog is absolutely the best, I don’t know why he isn’t cast as the villain in every movie. From Slashfilm:
Herzog will be playing a twisted old figure known only as the Zec — he’s the big bad of the film. … In the book, many of the character’s early appearances are only via phone. Casting Herzog means that the film can adopt that approach and have the character established through Herzog’s rich, distinctive voice. Whether that’s how the script is written we don’t know, however.
Perfect. There’s a good chance I still won’t be seeing the movie because I don’t even see movies that ARE in my movie-viewing wheelhouse, but that sounds perfect anyway. Speaking of his voice, why didn’t any of us mention Werner Herzog in the Mr. Ed post? HELLO? Do we have our brains on today? I can’t believe we all showed up today without our brains on, AGAIN. Obviously Werner Herzog should also be the voice of Mr. Ed. So congratulations to all of us on Werner Herzog getting cast in this movie and future Werner Herzog definitely getting cast as the voice of Mr. Ed. Things are looking up!
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I have my brain on today, but it’s a little sore because my cutemet was on too tight yesterday.
“Wilbur enjoys ze barnyard…but I find it to be…a place of….relentless muhrrrder.”
“In the book, many of the character’s early appearances are only via phone. Casting Herzog means that the film can adopt that approach and have the character established through Herzog’s rich, distinctive voice.”
Are we sure they didn’t just hire Paul F. Tompkins?
“Knock knock, who’s there, It’s me, Nature. I am going to crush you.”
Love me some Herzog. Fuck in A yesssss
Is Gabe ok? He’s so handsome and funny.
The official description of Jack Reacher, the main character in Lee Child’s books: “Reacher is a giant, standing at 6′ 5″ tall (1.96m) with a 50-inch chest, and weighing between 210 and 250 pounds (100–115 kg). He has ice-blue eyes and dirty blond hair.” This sounds just like Tom Cruise.
“…his teeth are shifted slightly to the left, disrupting the vertical symmetry of his face…”
That’s basically a description of Joel McHale.
Or Larry Bird.
ur larry bird
but ur bitch
Herzog’s villain is only a distraction from nature, which is far more subtle and cunning in its attempts to kill not just Tom Cruise, but all of mankind.
It is not that I hate this. I love it. I love it very much. But I love it against my better judgment.
He tortures his enemies by describing the Timothy Treadwell death tape but never letting them listen to it.
These comments are all way funnier if you imagine them being spoken by Werner Herzog.
I wans made unskilld lahbour pull ah rihver steem boht up a maunten, not to serf any greahter ideal of historikhal akurasey, but absudzist whimzy. I fohrsed peepel to werk undzer threht of gettink shoth. I fobid a sufferink, ill voman tho die if notz in mei presence. But zhis is nothink compahrd to what i haf in store fohr you Mr. Bond!
I’d be much more excited about this if it was sans Mr Cruise.