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According to your boyfriend, Perez Hilton, Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag have eloped to Mexico. Which is why we are suggesting Mexico be immediately sealed off and left to tear itself apart, Doomsday style. NO OFFENSE, MEXICO.
Alternate: “we’re going to need a bigger cask of amontillado.”
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Uh, you know the dude wasn’t put inside the cask of amontillado, right?
We’re gonna need a bigger duh.
I didn’t know how long I’d been waiting for a Cask of Amontillado joke until now. Well done, Sir.