It wouldn’t be perfect. No father-son relationship ever is. We would have our weird tensions and our testosterone-driven show-downs over this or that territorial perception. There would be failures. Kyle Chandler might be a great dad, but he’s also a human being, and there’s no such thing as a perfect dad. One night, when I was grown and out of the house and the baseball gloves hadn’t been picked up much less oiled in years, after we’d cleared the dishes from dinner, after mom had said goodnight and left to read a few pages of Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil before falling asleep, Kyle, I mean dad, wouldn’t even say anything as he poured two tumblers of whiskey and carried them out to the porch, and the two of us would sit in the darkness, listening to the cicadas buzzing in the trees. “I’m sorry,” he would say. Why are you sorry, I would ask, what do you have to be sorry for, dad? “I know that I play a great dad on TV, but at the end of the day, I’m just an actor. I feel like sometimes my career took me away from you and mom more than it should have, more than I should have let it. I just think I could have been a better father to you in a lot of ways. Don’t get me wrong, you turned out great. You grew up to into a real man and a good father yourself,” (I have kids of my own now), “and I would like to think that I had something to do with that, but I know you had to improvise a lot along the way. For that, I apologize.” Oh dad, I would say, you were a great dad. “I hope so, son” Kyle Chandler would say. We would both sip our whiskey in the night. Me and my dad, Kyle Chandler. (Photo via FuckYeahCoachTaylor.)

Comments (34)
  1. I wish Kyle Chandler and I could get shit faced at the Salt Lick before diving into the all you can eat buffet of meat. I don’t need him to be my dad, I just want him to be my buddy.

  2. “I wish Kyle Handler was my dad” has to be the most obvious thing Gabe has ever written on this site.

  3. I wish that Barbecue pit was my house.

  4. I am glad that my dad is my dad, but I wish Kyle Chandler was an uncle. Like, maybe he would have taught me to drive shift and let me have a beer if I promised not to tell my parents (but not in the creepy relative way. In the to cool for school older relative way).

  5. “I dunno, Adam Sandler just came over to my house with a ton of Italian BBQ supplies, so I said, ‘let’s grill!’”

  6. “Let me tell you what happens tomorrow, son.”

  7. one day when kyle chandler plays rick perry in an hbo movie, kyle chandler is really gonna be ruined.

  8. Everyone referred to the loud insects in the trees as “locusts,” then someone found out that they weren’t locusts at all – they were cicadas – but anyone who pointed that out would sound like a know-it-all dork. So I still call cicadas “locusts” even though I know they’re not. And Gabe and his dad Captain Taylor or whatever sound like know-it-all dorks.

  9. Kyle Chandler buries his emotions in a mountain of BBQ ribs.

  10. my dad worked hard in relative obscurity for years. he never got rewarded for his efforts. he never got an award. but he did his job damn well. and now, as his role has changed, he is starting to get the renound and recognition he long deserved, but never required or called attention to…

    kyle chandler is everybody’s dad.

  11. I wish Kyle Chandler were a lot of things to me, but my dad is definitely not one of them. (wink, wink, nudge, nudge, knowhatimean?)

  12. If Kyle Chandler was my dad, I think I’d get sick of hearing him repeating the line, “What are you DOING!?”

  13. My Dad and I almost had that exact scene last year! Everyone else was asleep! He poured whiskeys! I was like, Wow! This is going to be meaningful! And then my aunt? Who was also visiting? And needs to be the center of attention at all times? She stumbled out of her room and found us, complained she couldn’t sleep, asked what we were drinking, frowned because she doesn’t drink whiskey, poured herself a giant glass of wine, and then sat and talked/complained nonstop for 45 minutes.

    My Dad and I both stared at her like, What the hell, lady? Finally we lost the strength needed to outlast her.

    And so, I guess, we did kind of bond, in a way. Sigh.

    I’ll take it.

  14. Some nights all you hear is the faint rustle of a windbreaker and you know he’ll always be there for you.

  15. I just wish there was another season of Friday Night Lights.

  16. Clear eyes, clean your room, move out.

  17. I’d age.mingle that.

  18. I think this often enough, and comment it rarely, but I would just like to upvote this whole post.

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