Photos
Chet Haze! BEST RAPPER ALIVE! Did you guys hear that Lil Wayne and Jay-Z have both decided to retire and never rap again because something something Chet Haze? I read it on mediatakeout.com, which is a very good website. Anyway, Chet Haze played a concert last night! Oh to be a fly on the wall at the Chet Haze concert! (Flies don’t have ears, right? They can’t hear anything? Perfect.) His father, Tom Hanks was there, and also Rita Wilson! You know, for as much fun as we all like to have with these guys, it is nice to see a dad being there for his child. Admittedly, the dad is Tom Hanks and the child is Chet Haze and that will never not be hilarious, but you know what I mean. Gawker actually had a “reporter” (I’m sure) in attendance. You can see a cell phone video of the show over there, but here is a brief description of the night:
The show was not particularly off the hook. I was disappointed with the length, especially since he didn’t go on until almost 1:00, and with the fact that he was clearly rapping and singing over his recordings. I would have been more impressed if he didn’t need such backup. Also, it would have been more off the hook if he brought those sexy dancers out earlier instead of at the end of his last song.
I [took a picture] with him. After the picture was taken, he asked me, “How did you like me?” I replied, “Oh, you were amazing.” Then he walked away.
Haha. PEACE OUT! I bet Chet Haze carries spare microphones around with him so that after he asks someone “How did you like me?” he can just drop a mic and walk off whatever stage he is most certainly on. The show could have been more “off the hook,” though. (SIDENOTE: I did not know people still described things as being “off the hook”! Good to know. Pretty sure that is how my mom describes grocery stores.) Oh well. Better luck next time, Chet Haze! Daddy loves you!
 |
 |
You Might Also Like
 Anybody Have Theater Class Notes For Chet Haze’s Final… |  New Chet Haze Music Video, Son! #GETCHAZED |  Chet Haze Official Music Video, Son! |  A Friendly Chat With Gabe And Kelly: Chet Haze’s Reddit… |
Leave a Reply
Sign inSign in with FacebookYou must be logged in to post, reply to, or rate a comment.
“Yo! Pops never gave me shit! I earned my [Larry] Crowne, [opening July 1]. — Chet Haze
I like the second use of “off the hook” the best. I’m sure she briefly considered using “da bomb” instead, but decided to stick with what works.
P.S. It is weird that she thinks bringing out the sexy dancers earlier would have made it “more off the hook.” I’m not sure that this reporter had her mind on the right aspects of the concert.
I never realized the various degrees of the hook. I figured we were dealing in absolutes.
After Childish Gambino’s effort, I can’t wait to see Chet Haze Sleigh Bells remix “[Larry] Crowne on the Ground. “
Dad looks like he’s having a super (I mean “off the hook”) time in all of those pictures.
He looks like Jay – Z in that picture where he is sitting next to Beyonce at a basketball game or something, and they both look like someone just farted – you know the one, if I wasn’t so lazy I’d post them next to each other – and you’d all agree with me.
YOUR WELCOME!!
uhh…you can’t do Nick Burns condescension and mix up your and you’re.
“my welcome what?”
-your facebook friend who thinks this kind of comment is clever
Tom Hanks is just a guy with a lot on his mind.
I had a dream I saw a super psychedelic, educational film about the big bang with chet haze and colin hanks. Chet Haze described the movie as being “epic.” #nojokes.
“I was disappointed with the length, especially since he didn’t go on until almost 1:00. I would have been more impressed if he didn’t need such backup. Also, it would have been more off the hook if he brought those sexy dancers out earlier instead of at the end. He asked me, “How did you like me?” I replied, “Oh, you were amazing.” Then he walked away.”
There, fixed it.
Bravo, Sir, bravo.
Chet Haze: making it easier for other rappers.
Okay, so that photo of Rita Wilson? That is the most mom pose to ever mom in all of momdom. I can’t make fun of this! MATER FAMILIAS-RELATED GUILT OVERPOWERS ME!
Srsly, you guys. Like, that soldier-in-a-box did nothing for me, but this photo? I have to call my mommy.
I had the same reaction.
I know! She looks so “Look at my boy! So grown up and rapping!” Now I would feel like a heckler at a grade school play if I made fun of Chet Haze.
I would be very embarrassed to rap in front of my parents…because I would know what they were thinking. They would be thinking I’m an idiot…
Rappers“Legends.”twitpic strikes again
Well, to be fair, Jay-Z doesn’t have to sing the rap songs anymore thanks to his successful blogging career.
Chet Haze — now more street than Jay-Z (and with less Paltrow!)
Fingers crossed that Tom Hanks is his ghostwriter.
Worst Big Boi concert ever.
“Rita Wilson was very believable as the clueless mother who was in complete denial about her son.” — Actual quote from THE BLOGS about her guest spot on Law & Order SVU that totally makes more sense now
Colin Hanks should stick to acting!
This is going to sound weird, but Chet Hanks is sorta winning me over. Don’t get me wrong, after watching that video, ALL OF THE BARF came out of my mouth. Obviously. But there’s something about someone pursuing their passion that hits a soft spot for me. It doesn’t really seem like he’s trying to take advantage of his family’s name (admittedly, it would be strange for an aspiring rapper to take tout the fact that his dad was the star of Turner’s Got Mail in Seattle). He just seems like a kid who really wants to be a rapper and is absolutely terrible at it, which in it’s own way is slightly endearing. But only a little bit. Guys, stop throwing those tomatoes, they’re rotten and they smell bad!
“Take Tout” is Haze-ian slang. You wouldn’t know about it. I read it on Pitchfork.
I am the Chet Haze of the English language.
I feel bad because Tom Hanks seems so nice, he doesn’t deserve this kid.
I actually feel you on this- it is a little bit endearing! So I hope it helps to let you know that I went to the same college as him and have it on good faith that he is just a total doucheball. Now we can all sleep at night.
And now we’re all separated from Chet Haze by three degrees.
Yep. I go to NU and have to interact with him on occasion. Not a mean-spirited douche, but still a douche.
I mean, he won the gene pool lottery. Being related to Tom Hanks AND Abe Lincoln? So much potential awesomeness squandered…
Did everyone see the Adam Pally sketch on Funny or Die last week in which he asks Colin Hanks if Chet Haze based his life on Malibu’s Most Wanted? Because that was just solid gold A+ comedy.
Here’s the link: http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/66012848b8/riding-shotgun-episode-2
I learned some genetics in high school, so I think what we have here is parents with recessive douche genes coming together and creating the ultimate douche. Because Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson seem like the nicest people ever.
OK, quick poll. Who’s more ridiculous: people who go to An Evening with Charlie Sheen and get mad that he’s generally incoherent or someone who goes to a Chet Haze ‘concert’ and is disappointed by its brevity?
“It would have been more off the hook if he had done some of his earlier stuff, and not just his hits. But I guess you need to give the people what they want” — No one at this show.
yo son, where you be gettin that fly dope gear? Fruit of the Loom? i gots to cop me some of that.
-Chet Haze
First song: “IIIIII’M BLACK Y’ALL, AND IM BLACK YALL, AND IM BLACKETY BLACK AND IM BLACK YALL.”
I think I would like this guy about a hundred times more if he had a big volleyball-shaped chain that said “TOM HANKS’ KID” on it in diamonds
I just want him to mirror Vanilla Ice’s rise to the top of rapdom. Then three months later he can cap off a successful career by starring in his own movie titled Cool as Chet.
Wow kinda interesting. im gonna have you research his music. but speaking of Lil Wayne and Jay Z. Check out some of their mixtapes on http://www.entertainment-always.com