
A few years ago, I went to a barbecue and someone brought a b.b. gun. Obviously. We stood out on the back deck shooting cans off the railing, and it was agreed that I was so good at shooting a bb gun one-handed that I would definitely be our group of friends’s Zombie Apocalypse Team Leader in the event of a Zombie Apocalypse. (This was back in 2005 and I would argue that although Zombie Apocalypse jokes were already tired back then, they were not nearly as tired as they are now, and so some slack must be cut. Also, I really was very good with the b.b. gun and your team would be lucky to have me as its leader, so.) I’m not showing off my b.b. gun skills, although they are impressive, I’m trying to make a point: you learn things about yourself that you didn’t know before when you are at a barbecue. Secrets of the self are unlocked all summer long and the next day your clothes still smell like smoke and sauce. So get yourself to a barbecue, maaaaaaaan. Who knows what the mirror will reflect. And while you’re there, play this song:
The YouTube description for this video says that it is “a scene from the feature film “Chickens In The Shadows”.” So definitely make sure to look for that at your local cineplex. “One adult for Chickens in the Shadows, please.” “I’m sorry, ma’am, we’re all sold out for every show forever.” “Shoot!” And scene.
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Did they not realize that you can only see like 80% of the banner and thus it makes no sense? I guess not
was it me or was that opening scene very Clerks-ish? is Chickens in the Shadows the new Kevin Smith pic?
I AM NOT HOMELESS
smokes a joint
makes a dick joke
has to buy two plane tickets
heartily endorses jorts
“have you seen the woman i get to fuck in the ass every night? My wife is fucking hot and she loves my fat ass in jorts” – kevin smith, probably
ruin Die Hard sequel
YOU GUYS I DON’T THINK SHE’S REALLY TALKING ABOUT A BISCUIT.
I know, where’s the TWSS tag?
Yeah, that’s what I thought at first. But then she got into a lot of detail about the KFC menu, so…
Well that’s one way to make lunch ladies even more terrifying.
Honey sauce? Butter spread? Why are you making these delicious things sound gross?!
http://chickensintheshadows.com/
It’s a mockumentary, i.e., FAKE.
I’m not homeless either, but, dude, when a girl offers you a sandwich you wolf that fucker down.
Which one is Moose?
?

which one(s) is (are) Toasters?
Which one is Tennille?
I actually like this song… Its a good disco track.
Damn son. who the shorty @ 0:10? She has a nice ass.
They got a gig playing one song in a Consignment Shop.
walmart turned them down b/c management considered them a union
Called ‘Dantes or something’.
“Let’s get the band back together again.”
“Moose, we had three gigs back in 1979, and prog was long dead, even by then.”
“It doesn’t matter. Death stares me in the face every time I look in the mirror. Every time I see the Casio covered in cobwebs on the shelf in the garage, I want to shut the door and leave the car running. If we don’t get this band back together I’m going to have myself committed.”
“Ok, fine, I’ll do it one last time, for what we used to have. We’ll call it a thirty year reunion, but you can’t come to the middle school office in the middle of the day like this ever again. I have to work here. Where’s Toaster these days?”
“I think I saw him behind the KFC on 122nd and Madison.”
I generally yell “I’m not homeless” whenever people offer me food. My friends don’t have me over for dinner anymore.
reminds me of marty and elayne from Swingers…anyone?
they actually still perform at the Dresden in LA! 5 nights a week, I think
Absolutely. And they are actually extraordinarily good at what they do. Friends of mine who are talented musicians have sat in with them and can barely hang because they know like, every song, ever.
As a formerly frequent patron of the Dresden, I have to say that the best thing they do is pretending that that’s actually Marty’s hair. I
“I have never seen so blatant a rug in my life,” is what the rest of that comment was supposed to say.
I think KFC has a VERY strange idea of what “guerrilla marketing” is.
“You ain’t seen nothin’ till you’re down on a muffin then you’re sure to be a-changin’ your ways.”
…And while the honey sauce sounds delectable, if she has potato wedges she may want to visit her gyno.
Paula Dean is really branching out.
I wasn’t totally on board until the smokin’ keyboard solo happened. I’m glad they chose their best song.*
*disclaimer: This is probably me and my future wife (?) in 20 years.
It kinda screams Tim & Eric
No seriously, taste him
WHY CAN’T I STOP WATCHING THIS
Flight of the Toasters N’ Moose.