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Just in case any porn producers out there who look shit up on YouTube were under the misconception that Zachary Briggs is NOT available for your porn movie, he has issued an important clarification:
Come on, porn producers, hire this guy! He has definitely only been saving his virginity for your movie, otherwise he would have lost it a long time ago. Lucky US! (Thanks for the tip, werttrew.)
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I’d appreciate it if you didn’t talk about my boyfriend like that.
after watching the video I take it back. that just made me uncomfortable and I couldn’t finish it.
I only lasted 20 seconds.
Just like Zachary Briggs in his first porn film.
You’re welcome.
He kind of resembles Colin Farrell, so there’s some potential maybe, but I’m not sure we should go with him
Wait is that a yahoo email address, that is so professional, we will definitely hire you for all our porns
“That email domain is not professional enough for my porn videos.” – porn casting directors
“Maybe if it were a hotmale account…. Just kidding! That’s an old porn casting director joke!”
In middle school, he was voted most likely to end up on a future middle school’s “five worst people” list.
))((
OH FOR THE LOVE OF….well y’all know what I meant.
Where have I heard this particular speech pattern before:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pv61yEcOqpw
OH GOD! NO! Guys, we need to get a time machine, kill Hitler (voted history’s number one worst person), and then help Zachary Briggs make better life choices.
This guy is big in Indiana. He’s our governor.
ROASTED, MITCH DANIELS. Millions of high fives.
Hoosier governor? That guy
I feel like he accidentally knocked his front teeth out with his tongue ring. And good for him for sticking with it regardless.
Wait a minute, if he’s a virgin, what’s up with the tongue ring?
This guy’s favorite Christmas carol: All I Want for Christmas is My Two-Front Teeth (and To Lose My Virginity On Camera)
upvotes upon upvotes to you. I had to put my drink down.
seriousconversationthateveryonewantstimegum
Porn is degrading to women
this ends seriousconversationthateveryonewantstimegum
I think it’s a little more complicated than that.
Porn is also degrading to Zachary Briggs
Only if they are doing it right?
That’s a little like saying “Movies are degrading to women.”
This is a sort of over/under response, but: Yes, the majority is, but there are a few really awesome porn actors/writers (yes, writers) working from an explicitly sex-positive or queer lens, and they shouldn’t be blanket dismissed.
tl:dr: Kind of.
Orlando Bloom’s got to pay the Meth dealer somehow.
Zach Is A (Porn) Actor And A (Teeth) Model
This just made makes me
Whoops. I meant to say this just makes me ;( , but not checking my comments for mistakes makes me
der.
Guys, I’m worried about Andrew W.K.
“His first stroke… into a pussy.”
What?
I had my cursor hovering over the pause button in case he said: “But enough talk, let me show you the goods.”
I had my cursor hovering over the fullscreen button for that same reason.
“IN THIS ECONOMY…”
Amen brother. Amen.
This is pretty depressing. But I do enjoy how he encourages producers to look him up on youtube on youtube
Are they making a Deliverance porno?
I mean really, he ONLY is asking for $20,000 to $40,000. “In this economy” that is a fantastic deal.
“Thank you for covering my face, Zachary!” – Dwight Freeney
This just makes me so sad.
is that ziggy from the wire?
Pretty sure Ziggy’s no longer a virgin…
i’m surprised he’s still a virgin.
Kelly or (Gabe?) T1FTT ?
I would have thought this was funny if he was really self-deluded and had a completely inappropriate off-the-charts ego, but he doesn’t, his self-assessment was pretty accurate. And that makes it kind of sad.
What I’d like to hear more about is why he’s not sure if he’s 5’6″ or 5’10″.
25? What the hell happened to this kid? I agree with the Monsters who thought this was very sad. If I won the lotto, I’d track him down, take him to the dentist, and enroll him in Junior College.
Soooo . . . I looked at his youtube profile. Cannot tell if he is serious and creepy or if this is some epic Kaufmannesque stunt he’s pulling on all of us. I really, really hope it’s the latter.
Whatever you do, I recommend NOT watching the related video, ‘Zachary Briggs Crying’.
*Seriousgum*
This is a very troubled young man, and it is very sad, indeed.
Looks like the Tooth Fairy is paying out in Very Good Ideas.