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In the summertime, there’s nothing quite like getting together with a group of your friends, loading up your hitchback with towels and swimsuits and burgers and charcoal and beer and umbrellas and folding chairs and sunscreen, and heading to your local movie theater to see a big-budget movie. Classic. And this summer (every summer?) there’s a big-budget movie coming out basically every day. Lucky us! And almost all of them look not that great. Hollywood — how DO they do it?
To make your moving-knowing-about and movie-scheduling a little easier this summer, we’ve put together a gallery of lots of movie posters and release dates and very short comments. “Oh my god, thank you.” No problem. So get your planners and meet me back here because you are going to have a LOT of planning to do. Lots of movies to write in your planners with pen because there is no way you’re not going to see them all right on the day they all come out.
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I would just like to say how much I LOVE that the Fright Night poster looks DEAD UP like the cover of a Christopher Pike novel. Seriously.
Thank you! That’s exactly what it looks like, only it’s missing the frightened teenage girl looking over her shoulder!
I’m confused. Why isn’t the gorilla in “Paul Blart Zoo Cop” wearing his snazzy yellow tshirt? We all know it looks amazing and that he totally passes for a human being while wearing it.
He left it at TGIFriday’s where no one panicked upon seeing a fucking gorilla in a chain restaurant.
“Why are you guys giggling? Is my fly open? Did I spill something on my shirt? Did I… Wait a minute, did you guys put a giant metal “5″ through my eye sockets again?”
More like 5INAL DESTINATION
Sinal infection? I hate those!
“Finally, a blockbuster comedy about the deterioration of the American public school system!” – Something nobody will ever say about Bad Teacher.
“Bad teacherman” photoshop in 5…4…3…2…
…3…4…5…
That didn’t work out at all like you had planned, huh?
Or did it?
You win this round, my worthy opponent.
I love you guys.
Geez, give a guy a few more seconds.
I have the most educated boner right now.
teach’s legs are way smoother than that… I’ve heard… from another person… who isn’t me.
You all are the goddamned best.
Man, I bet “Friends with Benefits” is so pissed that “No Strings Attached” stole its thunder.
Also, can’t wait for “Godsauce: The Movie”
I’m torn between pride that I’ll be played by Jonathan Winters and sadness that there is a realistic chance that this shitfest could be his final role.
I’m going to save time by not seeing ANYTHING this summer, and waiting until they’re all compiled into one convenient “parody” movie.
Good thinking.
“summer movie” Starring Freddie Prinze Junior annnd OOooo Amanda Bines.
Or they’re all next year’s WMOAT nominees!
(Except Harry Potter,duh.)
(And The Trip probably, which kinda looks like My Dinner with Andre??)
They released a new Zookeeper poster if you want to add it
You know, I wish I saw the expiration date on this coupon before I ordered the Fabulous Fried Fish Flingers.
Not for resale? No thank you.
Shut up, just shut up. You had me at “PROSJUNEBOGO”
If the Conan tagline is “Born on the Battlefield” there really oughta be some babies with swords on the poster. #justsayin’
And Pat Benatar should be there too, Hit Me With Your Best Shot Conan
I don’t get why they keep making movies and not just posters and trailers, give the people what they want
and .gifs. Don’t forget .gifs.
bread and gifs, right?
Suggested tagline for Justin Timberlake’s Friends With Benefits:
“You don’t get a Mila friend without making a few benefits.”
#almostworks
Didn’t see any comment under that Transformers poster. Might I suggest: “Again w/ the Transformers? Oy…”
It was tagged “This is a movie about robots, coming out June 29th.” Which I thought nailed it right on the head.
Oh no, Final Destination 5 comes out the same day as the 5th Game of Thrones book!
Phew… i pre-ordered the 5th game of thrones book
Wait, no Devon Sawa?
whenever i see the name leighton meester, i imagine that peter lorre is pronouncing it.
Or that guy from the Simpsons who goes “Yesssssssssssss.”
“Why do you talk like that?”
“I have caaanceeeeeeeeer.”
I believe the line was “I had a stroooooooooooke.”
All jokes aside, Larry Crowne looks just awful. Ugh. Yuck yuck yuck.
BUT, Super 8, on the other hand has Coach Taylor in it, which by default makes it the best. Can’t wait for Super 8. (that’s actually a bit of an exaggeration, i definitely CAN wait for it and – LIT’RALLY – never think about it, but, Coach Taylor = will see, definitely)
also HP8 = HOORAY!
But Tom Hanks is the best, and the last movie he wrote and directed was That Thing You Do! Yes the trailer was bad but I don’t know I still have hope
Chet Haze’s dad is the best, and i’ve honestly watched (on purpose, and enjoyed) so many of his movies in the past 2 months i’m on the brink of a complete Hankserdose.
But, man, yikes, that trailer… just, OOF. I actually said “OOOF” out loud when i saw it. All i’m saying is when i inevitably watch it online out of boredom, my expectations are gonna be VERRRY low.
Harry Potter and Leighton Meester are the only two things in this entire slideshow that I care about. I feel like I belong in middle school.
Your avatar supports that.
(don’t worry, I am old enough for quarter-life crises, and I love Katy Perry, too)
I’m actually not really a Katy Perry fan (although I enjoy E.T. but without the Kanye verse… and I like Kanye but he is terrible in that song!) but I wish I could pull off the blue hair like her.
Plus it is supposed to be animated but apparently videogum does not support that feature for avatars.
Katy Perry got more likeable once I realized that, with her blue hair, cloned features and inscrutable relationship with Christianity, she is basically just performing her duties as the Rei Ayanami of our times.
I will be seeing all these movies at once in my movie command center, I can do this because I am the Fifth Element.
At least only 3 of them are sequels (4 if you count Zookeeper as a direct sequel to the dump I took this morning).
I thought Friends with Benefits was part 2 of the Those 70′s Sex Friends quadrilogy? Pretty sure Kurtwood Smith and Fez are starring in parts 3 & 4 lined up for Winter ’11 & Spring ’12 (respectively, of course).
Every time I see anything for Rise of the Planet of the Apes I can’t not giggle like a child. I am unsure if it’s because it looks completely bonkers and I can’t wait to see it or if it might actually be good and I can’t wait to see it. Either way, opening night. Same with Super 8, but because that looks awesome.
The Tree Of Life, Super 8, Horrible Bosses, Harry Potter, Winnie The Pooh, 30 Minutes Or Less THAT IS ALL.
yes Winnie the Pooh!
For a sentient being named Pooh, he seems awfully unconcerned about appearing wasted.
winnie the
pooppoohBad Teacher is totally copying off of Bad Santa. Still, I’ll see it.
Any way I can petition to nominate a movie for the WMOAT before it’s released?
Seriously. Those three lead names? If that aint the ultimate holy trinity of BARF…. I really don’t know how much farther down the rabbit hole we can go.
The reason I support this movie is that just from the poster, it is obviously going to be full of positive messages for young women. These messages will range from the importance of friendship and believing in yourself, to the fact that it is possible for a cable sitcom actress to be billed above a star of a network show (thanks, I am guessing, to the complex algorithms behind the marketing of a current media projects to a rapidly fragmenting consumer base).
I wish we could nominate Worst Movie Poster of All Time. This one would DEFinitely be a nominee. It’s like a junior SATC2. Barf.
Just know, I will be seeing this with a tall boy bud lime and a huge bag of gummy worms. Cheeseball flicks are best viewed under the influence of alcohol and sugar.
k serious question: did you make some of these posters up?
i wouldn’t know cause i don’t have the time/a television to know these things
i find myself looking forward to the one coogan is in. his role in 24 hour party people is an excuse for everything he ever did/does/might do.
So despite the fact that, from the movie poster, The Trip looks awful, I will still probably see it because I love Rob Brydon. He’s so funny! And Welsh!
Also, the kid from Terri went to my high school. And I actually did know him. We’re friends on Facebook, donchaknow.
Anyone ever see that article about the use of blue and orange in movie posters? Those are usually the dominant colours in Hollywood movie posters. This slideshow of movie posters is NO DIFFERENT!