Have you ever felt like you were just a pawn in a gigantic game of chess, that individual choice is an illusion, and that every action we make is determined by cosmic forces using us for some higher purpose? Have you ever felt compelled to act, without a clear understanding of why or to what end your actions would lead? There is a reason for that, my friend. You are but a puppet, and your master will use you and disregard you.
Now, it all makes sense.
Ladies and gentlemen, this will be my penultimate post. My day is almost at an end. The final post is already in the queue.
Writing Videogum for a day was fun! If this weren’t a fantasy job that doesn’t really exist, and if I weren’t planning to become a rich, handsome doctor, I would totally go into the lucrative blogging profession. I mean, it takes a lot of work, but if Gabe offers you the opportunity to do this, I suggest you go for it! If you can help it, you might not want to schedule it on finals week.
Like almost every other monster who has done this, I’d like to thank Werttrew for all of his help. Frankly, it would probably be better if he just let us use whatever time-dilation device allows him to provide so much support to us while attending to the duties of a new father with a whole extra life to support. Somehow, he manages to send a plethora of tips (including this one) and offer strategic guidance at every step. Clearly, he has found a way around the laws of physics.
I’d also like to thank Gabe for giving us the opportunity and for all his good instructions. If I could be any blog, I’d want to be his! Additional thanks to Scott and Amrit at Stereogum for all of their technical help. Thank you to my fellow guest bloggers: Huckabeast, Caringiscool, Notsewfast, and “Booger” Bradley (I <3 U, Superglue).
Most of all, thanks to all of you Monsters. My life is richer for knowing you.
Now, don’t retire from commenting for the evening until you’ve read my last post!