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EXCUSE ME, BUT ARE YOU KIDDING ME WITH THIS THING? IT SEEMS IRRESPONSIBLE. I HOPE THEY DO A BUNCH OF TEST SCREENINGS ON LAB MICE FIRST TO MAKE SURE THE LAB MICE DON’T DIE FROM CRY-SMILING. THE HUMAN HEART CAN ONLY BEAR SO MUCH, MR. DISNEY, THANK YOU, PLEASE BE MORE CAREFUL. HOLD ON, NO NO, THERE IS JUST SOMETHING IN MY EYE. HOLD ON. I HAVE TO GO TO THE BATHROOM.
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But can it ride a dog?
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I have no idea why, but this one made me laugh. 50th time’s a charm or whatever.
Wait, so who does the voice of Oscar?
I bet it’s one of the members of the Black Eyed Peas.
racist.
Sorry, I only watch monkey movies when they also feature one of the following:
James Franco
Clint Eastwood
Joey Tribbiani
George Romero
Also Stanley Tucci. DID NOT REALIZE HE WAS IN MONKEYSHINES. GOOD TO KNOW.
I was about to ask “What about Monkeybone with Brendan Fraser” and then I realized it completely makes sense to not watch Monkeybone with Brendan Fraser.
ooooh in my netflix que
What about Jason Alexander?
What about 12 Monkeys? Is there some sorta loop hole for that movie?
A time loop hole, yes.
Good thing they’re apes then, right??? #nitpickinggum
+1 for the ape/monkey nitpick. You should know better, Facetaco!
Renee Russo?
James Franco?
Are you referring to the cinematic masterpiece known to us mere mortals as “The Ape”? Because that is what you should be referring to.
This should be labeled NSFW just because crying your eyes out in front of cover up excel spreadsheet is not conducive to a good standing in the workplace.
Well, if I have to die in 2012 it’s good to know it is because my heart exploded from cute overload.
Um. So. Wait.
Disney’s camera crew just *happened* to be there before this li’l tykes entire family was killed off?
Uhhh. Something (or lots of things) is not right here.
Smallpox blankets.
Ice-T’s Small Pack-Or-Carryon Blankets?
Well, James Frey is executive producer.
It’s all fun and games until someone throws their feces at the camera.
or steals a baby.
You just described my definition of “fun and games” exactly
Needs more poop jokes.
This is how it starts, they are all cute a cuddly, then they are ripping your face off.
You’ve been warned.
Exactly. Very cute these chimps. Also, worst animal to be mauled by? Chimps. Hands down. Or hands OFF as the case may be.
Agreed. Chimps are terrifying. They hold grudges and go to war and do all the same terrible things that people do, plus more (cannibalism! Just to rub it in the face of the dead chimp’s family, apparently). This film should be about bonobos instead. Though then it might run into some Blue Valentine-esque rating problems.
is joey in this movie too?
Original title: Face/Off.
*sidenote. A friend of mine actually had a nuggets hockey jersey designed for him. It was stolen from our house in college after a partucularly out of control party.
“Too much dialogue.” – David Mamet
More like, “Too much dialog, too much, the dialog, dialog too much” — David Mamet
LITU! (logged in to upvote)
Can you imagine how many baby chimps they went through before they found one that the adult male chimp would raise as his own instead of cannibalizing?
“Ah fuck – CUUUT! He killed another one, godDAMMIT!” –Soulless Disney director and all of you weeping about how great this movie is
Oh you kinda covered this—didn’t mean to repeat same point (more matey and bashing than cannibalizing but whatevs).
I think we can all get behind the idea that adult male chimps are kind of assholes in general.
Spoiler Alert: Oscar grows up to play for the Baltimore Ravens.
He’ll probably get the least penalties out of the whole team.
I was okay til big chimp stroked lil chimp’s cheek. Then the sweetness overcame me, and I died.
The bit with the chewed-up leaves!!!!
the collective confetti-gasm at disney when they figured out what was going on must have been deafening.
It’s all cute and fun until the adoptive dad makes a Facebook page for the kid and starts writing status updates.
“My dad and I played with sticks today. lol.”
Found tribe of Bonobos. Killed them with the sticks. Ate them. YUM LOL!
“Fuck you.”
-@birdiepup
Not bad, but what if the chimp ends up in New York somehow? And what if he gets a job at a law firm? #HollywoodPostItNote
What if Sandra Bullock plays his adoptive mom? #HollywoodPostItNote
Oscar the Chimp in RomCom… Anniston available? #HollywoodPostItNote
Exchange overheard in every theatre in North America on opening weekend:
“Mom! Can I have a monkey?”
“No.”
“But mo-oomm!”
:NO!”
I like my documentaries with a thinner layer of schmaltz, and a good deal more David Attenborough.
“This movie is bananas!” — Ben Lyons
“Fuck Ben Lyons.” – Roger Ebert
B-A-N-A-N-A-S – Gwen Stefani
“Fuck Gwen Stefani”-Oxford English Dictionary
Uhh at the risk of all the downvotes forever:
Adult male chimps will happily and not infrequently DASH THE BRAINS OUT of non-offspring infants and juveniles in front of their mother before mating with said female. Not even once she’s pregnant to maximize resources for a definite need: they do it pre-emptively.
Basically, that Oscar’s mother was NOT PRESENT is the only recent he’s still out there holdin’ down the cute fort.
#darksciencegum
It’s a Disney movie. Of course the young protagonist is orphaned. That’s how it works.
(But this movie does look sweet, because chimps are beautiful and fascinating, and even if it didn’t have a heartwarming narrative I would happily watch 90 minutes of chimp footage. #naturegum)
demand nature follow basic “tragedy on page 10, good fortune on page 20″ story arch #DisneyPostitNote
it’s spelled a-r-c, not a-r-c-h #gizmoduckPostitNote
As someone who has actually worked with primates before (Spider, Capuchin, and Squirrel monkeys, which aren’t chimps but share many of the same social habits and characteristics), let me say that adult male primates don’t ALWAYS bash the brains out of babies that aren’t theirs. During my time working with monkeys, I unfortunately had to witness adult male spider monkeys kill a baby that wasn’t theirs, but I also witness on two occasions male monkeys from completely different family groups help take care of babies that weren’t theirs, even if the mother was around (I even saw male capuchins caring for squirrel monkeys as if they were their own babies). The caring and nurturing instinct of primates is incredible and adorable and you are being a buzz kill, but I’m still not gonna downvote you.
Yeah I think it’s safe to say that (as it goes with most things) there are nice chimpanzees and there are asshole chimpanzees. So like us!
As someone who actually has a chimp in his avatar (Bubbles) let me say that this movie probably won’t reflect any type of reality at all, but is instead a bunch of quick scenes edited together to tell a simplified anthropomorphic tale of good vs. evil and that Toys R Us stores across the country will be filled with adorable chimp robots by Christmas.
Hey fact-heads! Get your facts out of here and let me enjoy my classic Disney tale of an adorable motherless child just trying to find meaning and love in this world!
That’s why I watch Adventure Time
Long Live Finn and Jake!
Having never seen that show, I would like to go on the record as saying Achewood was fucking robbed.
Eh, nope. Follow @buenothebear and ask him.
No that’s totally fair, I’ll keep it to myself.
…..
(“Every living thing dies alone” btw.)
#becauseimabadperson
OH COME ON!!!!
Oh shoot. My ovaries just leaked chimpanzee eggs. AWWWWWWWWWW.
Also, best part = do you like seefood?
Super missed opportunity to license Weird Al’s Big Chimpin.’
I can’t believe they ate all that wasabi! Chimps are NUTS.
i liked this movie better when it was called MVP 2.
http://d.ratingmovies.com/servlet/Main/CoverDisplay/MVP_2__Most_Vertical_Primate_%282001%29.jpg?film_rn=4245
dang. how do you post images?
http://www.mobfd.com/2010/11/images-in-comments-guide-for-videogum.html
Until a couple years ago, my sister wanted to be Jane Goodall, so I fully expect to see this movie twice in theater, and again on DVD. Sounds good!
monkeys/chimps/apes/gorillas freak me out. thanks a lot, Jumanji.
I wish Dudley Moore could narrate this.
Side note, I am reevaluating my whole childhood after reading about the animal cruelty controversy surrounding Milo and Otis.
Why do we find lower species so goshdarn cute? What do you want to bet there’s some aliens in another galaxy, watching a holo-trailer, and screaming, “Oh my gawd! He’s so ADORABLE!!! I could watch this for hours!!!!” and it’s just footage of me driving to work and picking my nose.
Aw, you’re so cute when you comment on your websites!
Oh, and I hope this movie explains the origin story about why chimps like to wear berets and clang cymbals together.
What a lovely joke.
http://www.articlespeak.com/gamefly-free-trial-review/