Photos
I never thought I would say this, but I’ve got great Glenn Beck related news, you guys! From the Hollywood Reporter:
Glenn Beck will end his highly rated daily program on the Fox News Channel but continue “to develop and produce a variety of television projects for air” on Fox News and other related digital platforms.
Yay! Right? I mean, that was just a terrible show, I am glad it is going away. I know this doesn’t mean the end of Glenn Beck, who will have a long career of saying whatever the fuck, like, seriously, whatever, just shit he obviously does not actually believe (this is known as lies). And far more importantly, I know this doesn’t mean an end to the people who enjoyed watching Glenn Beck, because let us be honest, that was always the actual problem. No one cares what the crazy person is shouting in the basement, but you have to wonder about the people who invite him up to the dinner table, you know? That backwards, out-dated, uninformed, racist, and genuinely DANGEROUS mindset isn’t going anywhere. Those people still exist and are still desperately looking for something to make them vaguely angry and scared for reasons they don’t understand. Yikes!
But for now, A CELEBRATION:
WAITRESS, MORE BULLETS!
 |
 |
You Might Also Like
 Glenn Beck Is Just A Vlogger Now |  Glenn Beck For President, 2012! | Glenn Beck Cries Because We Don’t Live In A Coke Commercial… |  About Gwyneth Paltrow’s $950 Shot Glass |
Leave a Reply
Sign inSign in with FacebookYou must be logged in to post, reply to, or rate a comment.
“Thanks for the tip yesterday in the comments, Facetaco.”
-Some Other Blogger
http://ta.gg/3vu
hello this website is re-opened
It has some good things welcome to our website go shopping
http://zzzlist.files.wordpress.com/2009/11/advice-dog-glenn-beck-seriously.jpg?w=300&h=298
I initially read this as “to develop and produce a variety television project” and got kind of excited. I mean, The Glenn Beck Variety Hour would be kind of amazing, right? Can someone get on that shit for me?
That’s not what it said?!?
Don’t worry, he’s just leaving his show because TRUMP/BECK 2012 AMIRIGHT!!
We live in a world of great ideas.
World full of great ideas? Yep, sounds about right…
Ever since moving to Canada, I’m pretty sure poutine is the world’s greatest idea. How is it not the most popular food in America?!
Because we’re extremely bitter that we didn’t think of it first, so we refuse to acknowledge that it exists.
“WHAT?! Cheese AND GRAVY on fries?! Those Canadian bastards!”
America celebrates only the healthiest and most well-balanced snack foods, so I cannot see it embracing something as decadent as poutine. (“Super Size Me” is Canadian, right?)
But also – it is difficult enough to get decent cheese curds outside of Quebec/Eastern Ontario, and, as a patriot, I cannot allow delicious curds to be exported to a different country without first figuring out how to get them in Toronto on a regular basis. #regionalfoodstuffsgum
I usually get my Toronto poutine from the one food truck I know of that puts real cheese curds on it, and since it’s food truck poutine, my expectations for the cheese curds aren’t too high
Though I once had good cheese curds in Wisconsin. Get on makin’ poutine, Wisconsin!
I hear Smoke’s Poutinerie is delicious. I’m going to go at some point!
The fancypants poutineries get their curds shipped in, as far as I know. They may be delicious, but they cannot hold a candle to my favourite spot:
As far as I know, it is not normally on fire.
I don’t care how delicious that stuff might be, the name sounds so gross and totally unappetizing I could never eat it. Gross.
Hopefully this means that chalkboards around America can use this opportunity to gain our trust back and from now on offer their services to sane-minded individuals.
Oh Grover, don’t tell me that cap and gown are from Beck’s online “university” courses!
Actually, Beck-ian conspiracy nonsense would be sort of delightful in Grover’s awe-filled Muppety voice.
Also, looking forward to his forthcoming reboot of the literary classic, “There’s a Marxist at the End of this Book!”
Glenn Beck’s leaving his show to star in an American version of An Idiot Abroad. Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert will fill the Gervais/Merchant roles.
I hear the name “Two and a Half Men” is available.
YUS!
Hey now! The Stewart/Colbert equivalent is fine, but don’t you ever, EVER, compare dear Karly Pilkboids to Glenn Beck again.
This is totally calling for a Gif Party. But a subdued one, since he’ll be back, of course.
Jin?
Word.
Allow me to assist.
I am going to celebrate with a tea party
No, seriously. Cucumber sandwiches are the best.
I know a morning show that needs an anchor.
Troy & Abed & Glenn In The Morning?
I know a bottom of the ocean that needs an anchor
I know a planet that needs another satellite.
Why would the bottom of the ocean need an anchor? It’s not in any danger of drifting away.
I just for real choked on my coffee laughing out loud at that reply.
He’s finally taking the necessary steps to making America a better place.
Wait everybody, you haven’t though of the true consequences of Beck leaving Fox. Without Beck the tinfoil hat industry will surely collapse!
True Americans know that tinfoil hats are manufactured in China and are faulty, so they buy American-made tinfoil and make their own damned hats.
curses, foiled again!
It is times like these when I find strength in poetry. For example, John Donne says it best:
AS virtuous men pass mildly away,
And whisper to their shows to go,
Whilst some of their sad friends do say,
“Is this asshole finally done?,” and some say, “No.”
So let him leave, and make no noise, 5
No tear-floods, nor sigh-tempests move ;
‘Twere profanation of our joys
To tell the tea partiers of our love (of his absence).
Ending of th’ show brings harms and fears ;
Men reckon where Beck will show up next; 10
But relief of our current reprieve,
Though temporary, is the best.
The Government decides to go on a total shutdown and Glenn Beck wept, for there were no more worlds to conquer.
Um, you guys? This celebration video is one of the best things I’ve ever seen. The gunshot overdubs made me so happy.
OH MY GOD I COMPLETELY AGREE! Going to watch it like 15x now.
did you notice how disinterested the bride was at the end of the clip? clearly she is not awesomesauce.
From inside the lair of Roger Ailes
RA: So we have two problems with Glenn. One, he is too batshit for Rupert. Two, we’re losing real sponsors every day. We might as well rename it the Goldline Goldbond Medicated Foot Powder Hour. I need solutions
LACKEY: But he’s still winning his timeslot!
RA: You’re new, right? He’s winning against crap, and winning isn’t good enough. Rupert put me in this job to do two things: make money and advance the ball. Glenn isn’t doing either one, now. It’s getting downright embarrassing. It’s unfuckingcomfortable at parties. There I am at the Museum of Natural History in the David Koch dinosaur wing when David and his brother come up to me and offer me little pointers. The nerve!
LACKEY: Well if they think they can do better, let them pay for their own show.
RA: What did you say?
LACKEY: I said that if they think they can do better, why don’t they pay for their own show?
RA: Son, if I may call you son, that is brilliant. Brilliant! Get the Kochs on the line and offer them Glenn’s old timeslot. You’ve got a future in this biz.
annnnnnd scene
hahaha i liked how that mutahfucka just pulled out a glock from his waistband and shit.
He wanted to spend more time with his
familydemons.Wait, Glenn Beck is leaving his show? Are they going to use an impersonator after he leaves? Or will they just use a permanent sub host, like, “Welcome to the Glenn Beck show, I’m Alex Jones…”
“But who will foment our political unrest?” – Human garbage
I think the AFLAC commercials are about to get really weird, guys.