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Our lawyers called to point out that as guests of Videogum, we are contractually obligated to post at least one Chet Haze freestyle clip. Obligation fulfilled…
(You’re welcome, Gabe.)
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I can’t hear the video at work, but based on the “VLAD TV” I can only assume he’s rapping about vampires.
Actually Vlad TV is a sketch show where people impersonate John Madden as a vampire
It starts off about vampires but then it kind of wanders
Big ups to Bram Stoker
He’s a non-smoker
Bomb Stroker
You really say the weather with aplomb, Roker
(later he says a swear!)
Earl Sweatshirt makes a rare appearance on the hook
What a chet-bag
Man, an all-access wristband really gets you anywhere at SXSW, huh?
“Im especially honored to be here. It is such an honor. It is SUCH an honor to be here at South by Southwest, and here with Vibe, and…”
“Haze! Quit talking to the camera and get back to work. That vomit ain’t gonna mop itself.”
“I’m gonna say ‘fuck.” I’m gonna say ‘fuck.” I’m gonna say ‘fuck.” I’m gonna say ‘fuck.” I’m gonna say ‘fuck.” I’m gonna say ‘fuck.” Here it comes! Boom! Ha! I totally did it. Now for the false regret… aaaaaaaand perfect. Rep is made!”
Chet Haze is an interesting example of the perils of privilege. If he weren’t the son of a celebrated actor, he would probably not be an object of ridicule. That isn’t to say that this isn’t ridiculous, but it might have been stopped early by a friend who cared more about Chet-the-person than Chet-the-connection-to-Tom-Hanks-and-money. Maybe.
A friend, or maybe a wise uncle.
Too soon.
It’s a little hard for me to hate on Chet Hankze because he just seems so sincere at being a sincerely bad rapper.
“Tell me I ain’t the truth.” -CH to ET
The challenge has been put forth, monsters. Who among us dares to tell him?
aaaaaaaand I need to listen to 36 Chambers to wash my ears clean.
Chet Haze has made his own remake of C.R.E.A.M. called C.H.R.E.A.M.
Not gonna lie, I just Googled.
Do ‘rappers’..(that’s what he is, right? are you sure you don’t mean wrapper? y’know? one of those ladies at the customer service desk who gets your packages all ready for christmas? …maybe someone who gets paid to put condoms on dogs?) i don’t know..i feel like you are using ‘rapper’ wrong because ‘Rappers’ don’t give two shits if they are allowed to cuss, right? RIGHT?
I was literally squealing with embarrassment for Tom Hanks as I watched this.
Tom Hanks doesn’t strike me as the type to get embarrassed, in the best way possible
“Audentes fortuna iuvat” translates roughly as “Fortune favors the privileged white dude with the famous dad”, right? Cool tattoo, bro.
Man, I’m glad Chet Haze is finally getting some spot light. You know he has been waiting for his moment ever since Orange County came out.
BE A HAZER, NOT A HATER!!!!
Obligatory Barf Comment
I used to think that the only redeeming q
ah I wasn’t finished vgum!
…uality about Chanks was that he was KIND OF hot sometimes, but I don’t even think that’s true anymore… Here’s some vintage Haze!
p://i51.tinypic.com/2wgsx85.jpg
What a DWEEB.
UGHH done
He’s terrible, but I’d still hit it — if he had a mute button.
“I’m a big fan of wiz.”
-TWCHS
At least when he’s rapping he’s not really being interviewed. So Chet, keep on rapping
There is regularly better beat poetry than that at my campus’ Frat Boys and Poets night. There has been better poetry than that about grilled cheese. (This is because Frat Boys and Poets sells the world’s best grilled cheese, but that’s not the point.)
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