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Hey all! Your friendly neighborhood werttrew here, wrapping up the week for you all.
1. Twitter feeds for this week’s guest editors: Mans, Joe Mande, Shellbomber, Starlee Kine, and the Bob’s Burgers team. You can also follow some of the team individually, helpfully listed here by Mike Benner and Scott Jacobson.
2. Don’t forget to RSVP for the Videogum 3rd Anniversary Comedy Show and Also Party.
3. There was no caption contest this week. Bummer. I know you all live for it. So how ’bout an unofficial caption contest for the weekend??
Guys, so as you probably all know because you all live on the Internet, there is a video by a 13-year-old girl named Rebecca Black named “Friday.” It’s basically a vanity music video put out by some company called Ark. Now, it’s silly and insipid and exactly as vapid as every other tween music video out there, but as of last Friday it has gone into stratospheric viral video territory. Even your mom has posted it on her Facebook wall with the caption of “Oh dear! She seems sweet but she should find something else to do! And why isn’t she wearing a seatbelt?!?! LOL (lots of love).”
But I kinda don’t get it? Why this video, Internet? It’s not really so different from a Jessie J or Miley Cyrus or Justin Bieber video. Heck, it’s better music than Ke$ha. Internet, y u so obsessed with Rebecca Black?
On the other hand, I found this following video Wednesday and I have become mildly obsessed. (Mildly obsessed = I’ve watched it 12 times now.) It’s so thoroughly weird and outer-worldly and yet catchy? Oh Internet, why hasn’t Adya & Geisha’s “Cherubino’s Aria,” which is like an alternate soundtrack for The 5th Element as filmed by an 80’s publicity team, blown up already? Why aren’t there a billion gifs of this out there? Why hasn’t a fake Neil Young sung his own version of “Cherubino’s Aria”? Where’s the scream-o cover, the dubsteb cover, the Chipmunks version, the Pumpkinhead dance, the slowed-down version?? Sometimes I don’t get you, Lawnmower Man.
So here’s an unofficial weekend caption contest: What do the lyrics of this song mean? No fair if you, like, can actually talk Italy talk and understand it. Warning: May cause seizures.
After the jump, the five Highest Rated comments, as voted on by you, the Lowest Rated comment, and the Guest Editors’ Choices.
This Week’s Highest Rated Comments
| #5 |  |
Anchor Management | Mar 14th | Score:65 |
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Okay, so no one said it yet? Because this thing totally happened: |
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| Posted in: He’s Zack! He’s Wack! Get Used To It! | |||
| #4 |  |
the hammer is my penis | Mar 14th | Score:65 |
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Today’s TMZ headline: “Gwyneth Paltrow, new mystery beau, spotted canoodling at West Hollywood taco stand.”. |
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| Posted in: Hello, My Name Is Doc Hollywood | |||
| #3 |  |
DirtySpaceNews | Mar 14th | Score:67 |
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| Posted in: What is the HTML for “Vomit”?: A Review of Battle: Los Angeles | |||
| #2 |  |
the narrator | Mar 14th | Score:70 |
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Your teenage years seem a lot like a Scooby Doo plot. |
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| Posted in: And Now It Is Time To Rest | |||
| #1 |  |
Chris Trash | Mar 14th | Score:73 |
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Sorry to hear that, that sucks. |
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| Posted in: When Bad Trampoline Accidents Happen To Good People—One Monster’s Story | |||
[werttrew’s note: Congratulations, monsters. You earned it!]
This Week’s Lowest Rated Comment
| #1 |  |
The N | Mar 14th | Score:-66 |
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Your liberal mind needs to grow some balls before it stoically sacrifices itself in the name of women’s rights. This was the worst and least entertaining thing I’ve ever read on this site. |
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| Posted in: What is the HTML for “Vomit”?: A Review of Battle: Los Angeles | |||
[werttrew’s note: Oof, all five of the lowest voted comments this week were from folks criticizing this review (or defending their criticism of this review). Look, we’re all entitled to our own stupid opinions. But I don’t really get the negative reactions the piece elicited. Let me explain: I think of Gabe Delahaye’s comic style as verbally adroit writing where the humor derives from unexpected shifts and a funny indignation at everything stupid in this world. Gabe’s mode is energetic, deriving much of its power from his (real or put-on) anger. In contrast, I think of Mans’ comic style as expertly-crafted writing where the humor derives from these observations that are kinda neutral individually but when read in their totality build to something poignant and wry. Mans’ mode is a bit passive, deriving its power from allowing his readers to build their own inferences from his studiously noncommittal sentences. What I’m saying is that I understand wishing Gabe was writing instead, but if you can’t appreciate how great they BOTH are, then you’re missing out on something awesome.]
Guest Blogger Mans’ Choice
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Zachary Fedell | Mar 14th | Score:7 | |
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Where David Foster Wallace at, String? |
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| Posted in: David Foster Wallace Interview Outtakes | |||
Guest Blogger Shellbomber’s Choice
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the hammer is my penis | Mar 16th | Score:10 | |
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WHAT? Mom told me that took him to a nice rap farm out on the country. |
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| Posted in: All Nate Doggs Go To Heaven | |||
Guest Blogger Starlee Kine’s Choice
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flaknitter01 | Mar 17th | Score:0 | |
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I went to the TAL Fathom Events simulcast in 2009 and was surprised at how blonde you are. In my mind’s eye, you’re Asian. Please pick an avatar so I don’t get confused again… |
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| Posted in: Meet Today’s Guest Blogger: Starlee Kine | |||
[werttrew’s note: FYI: I had told all five guests this week that they could submit an Editor’s Choice if they'd like, but that it was purely optional. Some chose not to participate, which is perfectly all right! But just in case you were wondering why there’s not five.]
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Congrats, Ballers!
My birthday is on Sunday, so I am going to be doing this all weekend:
Early Bappy Hirthday Gremlin
Happy early B- Day Nightmare! Save some cake for the rest of us! JKJKJKLOLOLOLOL!!!!!
Happy birthday, nightmare! I hope it’s a good one!
Happy 18th.
Happy Birthday! Party time?
Party Time.
Happy Birthday eFriend! Have fun and please don’t eat me.
It is also my birthday on Sunday! (Nightmare and I have already discussed this on the twitters, all of them!)
Happy Birthday, Nightmare!
Party all you want, just stay off your cell phone in the library.
If that video was just her dancing like this, maybe to Willow Smith, it would have been a lot better
now I’ll just pretend all awful people just want to dance
So how about an unofficial Thursday Night Gif Thread
Friday + Thursday Gif thread = Perfect place for Lil Sebastian reactions, yes? Don’t leave a bro hangin’.
I put all mine here:
http://mobfd.blogspot.com/2011/03/concert-addicts-weekly-gif-round-up_18.html
But here is my favorite
crashed my internets. worth it.
It’s Friday, WE OUT.
/waits for Friday gifs. No, the other Friday.
The choreographer has watched the Oops I did it again video quite a few times, I bet.
Shellbomber was extremely generous to award me an editor’s choice, considering that in my 16 word post, there were not one, but TWO typos. Way to not be proofreading, me.
You desrve iit.
Good job everyone; this was a fun week!
Although it was sad when Denver got put to sleep.
Oh maaaaaaaan. Now I’m crying.
RIP, Denver. You are in heaven now, eating cat treats with the angels.
It wasn’t even here, but Ask A Pigeon was the best thing to happen to me all week, so thanks, Patrick M!
I am extremely happy to have potentially had a minor part in possibly providing a fragment of what ended up leading to inspiring one of the funniest things I read on Friday.
The guest bloggers did a great job this week and gave me lots of LOLz.
Up top, y’all!
Yeah DSN! I’m always so psyched when Monsters who aren’t usually in the Ball make it to the Ball. It gives hope to the rest of us.*
*I’m the rest of us, duh
Happy Friday everyone!
Jawn I’m really surprised that you have never made it into the
ball you are one of my favorite commenters, I will in all my finite
powers make sure I do my part to have you in the ball. I would
even go as far as relinquishing my ball status for you. I don’t
need it.
Anyway, goodluck and godspeed.
Thanks Sloth.
Awesome! I was excited when I heard that Wert would make an official Monsters Ball this week, but I also got the gold?
Thank you monsters!Do over!
It won’t load the full gif. Here’s a link if you care http://tinypic.com/r/1531to8/7
Holy shit. Is that a Tyler Durden pop up on the left?! GENIUS!
I know you said this was cheating, but I have to point out that for Opera Reasons too complicated to explain, the actual words to this song basically basically translate to mean, “I feel an intense, sexual passion for every woman I see.” Adya & Geisha must be going for that “are they or aren’t they” thing, like t.A.T.u.
Basically.
But every woman she sees is herself. Usually in a striped dress. Sometimes in beige.
If all versions of her feel the same way, dating should be no problem.
(Incidentally, this thing is cramazing. How do you NOT watch it ten times?)
Yeah, you’re right. I looked it up.
The lyrics and melody are a snippet from Mozart’s aria for Cherubino from The Marriage of Figaro. It’s just these four lines repeated:
Non so piu cosa son, cosa faccio,
I don’t know any more what I am, what I’m doing,
Or di foco, ora sono di ghiaccio,
Now I’m fire, now I’m ice,
Ogni donna cangiar di colore,
Any woman makes me change color,
Ogni donna mi fa palpitar.
Any woman makes me quiver.
I wanted to mention that I saw Danny Masterson at the Strokes concert this past Saturday. I had a horrible urge to yell out “Tomatobank!”, but my body thought it might not be fun to provoke a Scientologist. Anyway, problem averted, because right behind him was Macaulay Culkin and my brain went “Tomato-wait is that Home Alone!?” and my mouth went “KEVIN!!!!!” in a very high pitch. I usually don’t like to brag, but c’mon! kevin?
I hope they went together, and are best friends because Macaulay and Mila dated and the entire cast of That 70′s Show remains besties in syndication
They probably were. I think he’s with Bijou Phillips now because they were arm and arm (look at me, sounding all tmz-ish. barf) but I couldn’t tell because I ran away as soon as I saw her for fear of catching the Philips Curse of Horribleness. Macaulay Culkin was looking rich-poor -not even poor people can look that poor. You gotta have a lot disney dollars to look THAT poor. and he had that creepy blonde 5-o’clock shadow. And then he gave me a porcelain white turtle dove. good times.
since i’m late to the party because time zones but
bob’s burgers appreciation gif
Good week everyone! Awesome guest blogging and general Monsterness.
T-Minus 1 hour until my weekend starts… and then:
that girl looks like she accidentally held the cigarette wrong and burned herself. Amateur!
Community, got a third season!
everyone thank this guy now
Also, ignore the comma.
Mr. Magnitude how do you feel about this news?
Parks and Rec got a 4th!
Awesome sauce!
Why did I put a comma in there?
To give us time to brace for the news.
God I can’t wait to leave work:
I’m headed out the door! I LOVE WEEKENDS!!!!!
Italy’s response to Rihanna is perhaps a little too on point.
I thought she was singing about the dangers of nuclear radiation…
Facespaghetti? Facespaghetti.
DonnaFace? DarkoFace.
Thank you monsters for all your kind words. It was a pleasure.
Great job everyone! It was a fun week and I learned an incredibly valuable lesson. That is, parents should never encourage their 13-yo children to become famous singers (looking at you Papa Zack, Mommy Black).
What, my second inclusion in the ‘Ball? My first trip is not just a statistical anomaly anymore? Oh man, this means I’m anywhere between two-thirds and one-fourth of my EGOT, depending of definition of the term? CRAMAZING, LET’s PARTYYYYYY!
I have only been reading and hanging here for a month or so, but I loved this week’s guest bloggers as much as I love that usual dude, Dave? Awesome job, y’all!
Well, it’s been a pretty shitty week. I lost my job last Friday, Japan went to shit, there’s near nuclear fall out across the Pacific, and that stupid “Friday” song is stuck on my head.
But I made it to the Ball. It hasn’t been all bad I guess. Thanks, monsters!
I should come back here more often, cause I missed Mans guest blogging. Great job Mans!
Sorry this is so late.
The guest bloggers were all fabulous. Thanks for the laughs to offset the super craziness at work.
I just woke up from a St. Patty’s bender, so I missed Friday and my first chance to ironically blare some Rebecca Black.
What’s the worst thing about working on Sundays? I don’t get to use Videogum to take a break every 15/10/5 minutes.