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P-Holla, a member of the C-Zoo rap crew (which stands for Columbus Zoo, because they are from Westerville Ohio) has released a Chet Haze diss track! UH OH! The best part is that supposedly P-Holla is a senior at Northwestern University (where Chet Haze is also enrolled). Haha. Campuses is talking! This is the biggest hip hop beef since Nas vs. Jay-Z just kidding! They’re probably going to end up battling it out during the “naked mile” or some shit. “Let’s settle this over a game of flip cup, son,” etc.
My favorite line: “Tell your dad I said what up though/R.I.P to his son, call it cut-throat.”
My second favorite line: “Oh you mad cuz your girl wants to do me/your main boo was in Bratz: The Movie.”
STONE COLD DISSING. REAL HIP HOP. Full Chet Haze diss track (#swag) after the jump:
Haha. Oh man. Hasn’t Chet Haze seen 8 Mile? You’ve got to make fun of yourself first so that your enemies have nothing to work with. HIPPITY-HOO-BLOM HANKS! (Thanks for the tip, Joe Mande and aftershock.)
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Oh, snap. Looks like Chet got Hazed lol!!1!1
“Just because his father is famous doesn’t mean he’s entitled to anything.” – George W Bush
“Think you’re a rap star/ but I drink more than you” is my new favorite lyric ever. I’m probably going to say it about fifteen times to day to completely blank stares.
I’m going to brag about my black socks.
I am worried this could lead to a deadly drive-by food fight in the Student Union.
Ultimate frisbee match to the death.
“Put the hacky sack down! Someone…could get a bruise that could last for day…or two.”
Shit’s gonna get real on the Diag.
Don’t you mean the “Stu”?
(Can someone fact check this for me? I am pretty sure that’s what the Haze calls it…)
These kids and their hip hop slang…. I can’t keep up!
I’m pretty sure “Stu” means “Studio” in Hazespeak. #notanexpert #wishiwas
“Stu” is what Mama Hanks makes on cold days. Keeps his beats hot.
Just Desserts I’m pretty sure this is the story you were born to tell.
As a Northwestern Alum and Columbus, Ohio native, I can honestly say I’ve never been prouder.
“This is literally the best thing that has happened to my specific subset of the population” – Northwestern students who grew up in Columbus
BRB, getting a tattoo of Birdie wearing a Wildcats jersey and a Buckeyes hat.
My boyfriend is a NW alum and routinely points out when somebody famous or in the news is of NW stock. He is getting annoyed that my new response to this is always “Yeah, but Chet Haze.”
You can also use “Yeah, but Zach Braff”
After homeless radio voices and our Zoo Crew, what will be the third point in our Cowtown Viral Triangle? Will Wags and Elliot use profanity? Will President Gee be photographed setting a couch on fire?
I grew up FIVE MINUTES from the Columbus Zoo. I could easily walk there. POWELL OHIO WHAT UPPPPP REPRESENT YO
Chet, don’t let the haters get you down. Let me know if you need my services.
You appear to be “butthurt”
You know what they say Chet…
G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G-G- Unit!…..at Foster-Walker Undergraduate Residential House
the fruits of our disstopian future
My favorite part is when he spells his name and it ends with A is for always gettin’ ass.
Is this going to result in another east coast-west coast tragedy?
I hope so. Midwest-Midwest tragedy doesn’t have the same ring to it.
I know, right? My hope is that people on each coast will rep either Chet or P-Holla and will weed out some of the underbrush, if you catch my drift.
NorthWEST SIII-EEEEEEDE!
“See you at tha crossroads, crossroads, crossroads.”
– Northwestern University a capella group, singing to stop the fighting.
I am amused by the idea of ask Tom or Colin Hanks for Chet Haze’s autograph.
Man, I bet 2Pac is spinning in his grave…OR HIS BED IN HIS SECRET HOUSE IN BALI!!!
When P-holla winds up on a deserted island with a volleyball in his skull you’ll all know why, you don’t mess with Chester Haze
I hate anyone under the age of 25.
Unless you comment on Videogum.
Or you’re one of Teacherman’s or Baby Friday’s students.
Or, like, related to me, or any of you.
Between Asher Roth, Chet Haze and now P-Holla, frat rap seems to be all the rage. I’m getting in on the ground floor you guys! Here’s a cut from my first single “Fraternity Row”:
Now the Five Points Pub on a Saturday Night
Is pretty great if your young and rich and white
We’ve been known to get down and party hard
And throw more than a few rounds on daddy’s credit card
Yeah, we gonna celebrar like it’s Cinco de Mayo
Cause I made a C+ on my spanish ensayo
So put on your boat shoes and your khakis yo
And we’ll take you on a tour of fraternity row!
part of me feels like chet haze is just too easy of a target. i hate to kick someone while he’s down (and by down i mean incredibly rich and privileged). he’s so obviously ridiculous that it’s like – what’s the point? then i come to my senses and remember that he’s friggin hilarious.
The fuck son? Whatever happened to the good ole dayz of hip-hop when one would rap about shooting it out with NYPD? This is some bullshit.
As one of Chet Haze’s top listeners on Last.Fm, I feel like I should be defending him. But as we all know, what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. I hope Chet comes back, lyrics ready, mic steady, vomit on his sweater, personal chef’s spaghetti charging into battle like a true frat rap warrior he is with a red cup full of jungle juice to spit at all the haters.
#GETHAZED
For some reason I am kind of proud about it.
Man, I can’t wait for the next mediocre rap beat to stroll around and take the mediocre rap beat throne away from Black & Yellow…
HEY YOU OVER THERE YOUR STUFF THAT YOU LIKE SUCKS
HEY! NO! NOT TRUE! YOUR STUFF THAT YOU LIKE SUCKS!
NUH UH
YUH HUH
NUH UH
YUH HUH