Photos
(My introduction requires the proper musical accompaniment. Please press play, wait nine seconds, and then continue reading.)
Hi ninjas. I’m werttrew. What should you know about me? Well, this is what I will and won’t bust:
1. Caps? No.
2. The moves? Oh my yes.
3. Rhymes? At times.
4. Myths? No: I CREATE legends.
5. Some heads? YES.
6. Your windows out your car? Oh yeah, I did it, you should know it. I ain’t sorry, you deserved it.
7. Your chops? Only if they’re pork.
8. A gut? Yours, most def.
It is February 18, 2011, and today, you’re in my house. Welcome. Here, have a Sprite. Kick back and enjoy. Prepare for the “Final Countdown”…to Fun!
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I have been refreshing Videogum so frantically all morning in anticipation of Werttrew’s kickoff, that I think this post actually busted my F5 key.
“How’s that syntax, Superglue?” “Perfect.”
9. Your F5 key? Apparently, yes.
I’ve always suspected that werttrew was in fact, Gob Bluth. This just about confirms it.
I was playing trivia last night at a some bar and one of the answer selections was Frank LLoyd Wright. Immediately your avatar popped in my head. Turns out it was the answer. Also turns out, I suck at trivia.
I have always suspected that he was Toshiro Mifune, but thats just my own private hangup.
Perfect Song choice Wert!
Dad jokes? Always
And forever, don’t ever forget forever.
When I think of Werttrew, I think of this old learned soul who show up in movies the hero is all
but then he makes them all
Break a leg, wert!
(I’m sensing a lot of gifs today!)
THIS IS MY FAVORITE COMMENT EVER.
I read this comment while the video was still playing and by some miracle the dogs’ movement was in sync with the music. My day is now running at perfect 10s.
that first dog really knows how to rock out to the final countdown. and that second dog really knows how to rock, period.
Werttrew is about to make this blog his bitch.
But sweetly. Like with gif(t)s and long term commitment.
I know I should be saving this for The Ball, but I just can’t wait. Keep up the good work, wert.
Hooray! I’m so excited! like, got-an-N-64-for-Christmas excited!
YES! YES! YES!
I love the whole “leave a comment, follow up with a .gif” bit.
I’ve been just sitting here waiting for this since 9:30!
This. This .gif is all I need to be happy in the world.
Hey, werttrew, welcome to the blog! Hope you’ll find your niche in our little commenting community!
Gifs for werttrew!
How did you get that GIF of me at home last night after my bath?
Oh come on!
How did it get there? Huh? How did it get there? I mean come on.
This is so cute that my bowels just emptied themselves. (Sorry, but that’s the risk of kitten GIFs!)
Oh.My. God.
FUN FACT: The file name extension “.gif” stands for “guess I’m fucked” and dates to the United States Civil War. It was a code between Union soldiers used when assigned to the detail responsible for cleaning Gen. Ulysses S. Grant’s beard.
FUN FACT: My employer kind of invented .GIFS and tried to keep everyone else from using them!
Your employer was a Union soldier in the Civil War! Holy Crap!
Their office pantry has nothing but sarsaparilla and hard tack.
That would explain why everyone here is OLD AS FUCK and has a BEARD.
you work for CompuServe? how’s that going?
Mans, Only 2 months away from Conferderate History Month thanks to Virginia! How are you going to celebrate?
Guest blogger week has been a blast.
Bring it home, werttrew!
You and your palindromic name.
I have a prediction: This will be the slowest loading day in Videogum history, but ti will be worth it.
The first comment is open to all today.
Al Gore invented .gifs.
Monsters, weird shit is going on in twilly’s workplace today. A werttrew Friday is going to make it all okay. Even if they fire everybody!
Fingers crossed everyone’s just being fidgety because they’re preparing to throw you a SURPRISE PARTY!!!!!
If not, though, you know werttrew will treat you right on this side of the world (the internet side).
BRING IT.
Hey Wert, you’re having a kid soon, right? Don’t forget, mine is just turning a year old, and any advice or old baby items you need, you can count on me! I just sure hope you remember that when it comes time to for editor’s choice in this week’s Ball…
Here’s an ultrasound of Werttrew’s child:
OH SNAP IT IS ONNNNNNN
Do it Big Wert
I used to watch this lady play songs from A Clockwork Orange when I was employed and had lots of time on my hands. I missed her.
I’ve been waiting patiently. I’ve had my exotic oils and incense laid out since Monday. Today is going to feel so good, you don’t even know you guys. We are about to get worked-over, given “the business” if you will. The Master Monster has been given the keys.
I have no questions.
This song finished literally the same second I finished the comments. Perfection.