Don’t you hate it when this happens?
You’re already having a bad day at work and that guy you hate keeps calling you a Kristen Wiig-alike, when all of a sudden you’ve got flambé junk. You can’t go to the bathroom on your floor because the walls are paper thin and you’ve got some hardcore grunting to do. So you go three floors up for some peace and quiet in another department only to find that you’ve chosen the floor the hot guy you always see in the elevator and cafeteria works on! So much egg on your face! So much infection in your urinary tract!
And in the rush, you forgot to take off your pants! The guy you hate calls you Hugh Jackman now and you’ve got to quit your job in our current economic climate. So now you work as a freelance Kristen Wiig impersonator at nobody’s birthday parties.
If only you’d visited the Woodlands Medical Specialists when you had the chance. And where’s your gray hoodie?
UGH! Don’t you just haaaaate it when that happens???
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She was DEAD THE WHOLE TIME?
Definitely better on the second viewing.
I only wear my grey hoodie when I’m eating yogurt.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qMRDLCR8vAE
Completely. Awesome.
It’s always tough when urine that kind of heated situation.
Drugs make it hurt when you pee
For this next quickfire, sponsored by Woodland Medical Specialists, you have to create a dish that accurately mimics the sensation of trying to micturate with a urinary tract infection.
Your time starts….. NOW!
“I like how it started with notes of asparagus and then ended with notes of asparagus.”
I’m willing to bet she went to the University of Rhode Island.
I think you mean she went to Universal Technical Institute. (Yeah, THAT Nascar.)
Pissing fire #badsuperpowers
Giving someone a bladder infection at a glance.
I’ve always found that when I have a UTI, it helps to listen to a little Urethra Franklin to relax.
I prefer PP King.
I go for Wee Monsters
Don’t forget Pee Jay Harvey
More like VJ Harshpee, amirite?
KD Wang over here
CeCe Peniston
The Tinkling Heads
Mates of Prostate
Clay Aiken Bladder
Kings of TheJohn.
Guys, no. The Cranberries.
Squat the Hoople
Also, this post: TBS very funny.
Our guesties are killing it this week.
I hope they all have a roundtable discussion tomorrow called “Guestie x Guestie x Guestie x Guestie x Guestie”
This seems a lot like the Kübler-Ross model, with “flambe a nicotine patch” thrown somewhere in the middle.
“I don’t think were gonna learn anything from THIS burning bush.” – Professor Steven Winwood
Are we sure it’s UTI, and not Ghost STD?
I preferred the novel

The gigantic, gigantic novel
This doctor’s Magnus Opiss for sure
For reasons we need not go into I participate in some clinical research trials, and I think I can say with some authority that EVERY clinical trials unit at every research hospital in the nation could really use a decent graphic designer on staff. Everything they produce looks like this. I mean HONESTLY.
As the person who usually gets roped into creating the advertisement materials for clinical trials in our office, I will let you in on the secret of why they are always giant pieces of crap: it is because I make about $3000 a year. I am terrible, but highly affordable.
That’s awesome! Is there any job at all that a monster DOESN’T do? Yeah I guess research dollars are always tight, and I certainly don’t want the resources required to produce clean, elegant publicity materials to come out of MY $45-per-visit. (Also, I am seriously hoping you left off a zero! Otherwise I am calling the Bureau of Fair Labor Practices or whatever on your behalf.)
Urine trouble?
Urine luck!
Woodlands Medical Specialists is Number One!
Woodlands Medical Specialists: Our analysis of Urine-alysis.
If peeing feels like butter grillin’ , we’ll give you Penicillin.
Nothing tastes as good as pissing feels.
If you think you can’t get a UTI, then urine denial.
What did one dehydrated Frenchman say to the other dehydrated Frenchman?
What are we going to do now, Pierre?
#laffytaffy
I love a good joke about Europeeins
One of the best jokes! Hey, joke, on a scale of one to ten, urinate
Honestly I just hide in the bathroom for a few moments of being alone and I hate it when other people come in and pee.
There is no joke there, I AM JUST SAYING.
I feel the same, except replace “moments of being alone” with “anonymous gay sex.”
just be safe ♥
No joke: I like using the bathrooms at the Subway down the street. IT IS SO CLEAN!
SO CLEAN! so much better than any of the bathrooms at work….
Anyway, that is my secret spot so STAY AWAY…don’t be pooping in my sanctuary. (NO!)
Does a bear piss in the woodlands medical centre? With proper care and a healthy diet almost certainly yes.
Well done! Bravo.
Hey. UTIs are nothing to laugh at. Ugggghh.
This is why I left Pensacola. Just kidding, I’m still here.