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Haha, SEO rapper! When I saw the words “SEO” in a ‘tips’ email I was like “Ew, not clicking” and then I saw it was from Scott Stereogum so I was like “Whoops, enthusiastically clicking!” As a nerd I have a natural side-eye to both rap and SEO but this is actually funny? It’s funny because it’s not trying to be funny at all, it’s just being sincere and inherently goofy which makes it funny, just like Beverly Hills Chihuahua.
I was also planning to tear this guy apart because SEO (“Search Engine Optimization”) is snake oil and I was sure he would say stupid things in his song, but nope! He’s actually pretty right about stuff and giving good advice? That’s totally how PageRank works! This guy is good. He should really get hired by an ad agency and/or signed by a record label ASAP.
Maybe I should hire him to teach me how to do SEO because I clearly have no idea how it works. Funny videos sexy girls cute women hot xxx recaps tags cats fart reviews laughs jokes.
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I’m going to lose my virginity to this song.
That song just gave me mine back.
That song gave me yours back too.
“Bartender, a round of virginities for my friends!” – Gabe, at some beachside cabana bar or something.
Dude’s gonna have so many hits
Goddamnit Brad, you’re not going to charm me into watching Beverly Hills Chihuahua.
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Uh-oh. Now comes the inevitable East Coast / West Coast search engine feud.
It will ultimately end in the sad death of the Notorious B.I.N.G.
Cache rules everything around me
Alta La Vista, Baby.
Now THAT’S how you make a Notorious B.I.G. joke. Thumbs up!
A$k Jeevez
I used to dream
We used to read real-ass magazines
Ink and pages in my hands up in the limousine
Now i’m in the spotlight cause I search tight
Ad space get paid, more hits than the girls laid
I used to think I was kind of tech-savvy, but I’ve been in a cocoon or something throughout my 20′s and now I am 30 and I don’t know how to make a website and I feel like a grandpa with an iPhone.
I felt like that until I had to explain Twitter to the middle-aged ladies I work with. I felt like Steve Jobs.
Explaining Twitter to middle-aged ladies is basically impossible. It just makes everyone feel dumber.
Reminds me of back in the day when I rapped as HTMLL Cool J
DMXML
Nah, I liked Notorious U.R.L. better.
RSSDMC
NWWWA
ISODB
FIFOrganised Konfusion
…You can’t fire me, I quit.!
WYSIWYGang Starr
The ROOTS
ISP Diddy
(ok, now I really quit)
CPMinem
Ascii – E
FTPenis
ITS SOOO FUKKED UP THAT ARCANE FIAT WON A GRAMMY BUTT THE SEO RAPPER GOT NO AWARDS RESPEKT WTF?!?!?!?!111/1?!?!
#earlierarticlereferencegum
Hm. Now I want to go learn what any of those words meant.
He’s no Steve Winwood ft Chris Trash, that’s all I’ll say.
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Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see
I’m missing the point here. Obscure internet video are no longer fair game?
Fair point, obscure internet videos are always fair game. If I could delete that first comment I would, but it’s forever in the Videogum archives (to be studied by historians for centuries to come). I must be taking crazy pills. I’ll just disappear across the Mexican border, never to be heard from again.
I think the primary problem with your criticism of this post is that your criticism doesn’t really make any sense. Brad admitted that he was a decent rapper who definitely knew what he was talking about in terms of SEO. It’s worth posting because it’s a funny subject that isn’t normally rapped about! Much less not-fake-rapped about!
I think you’re just upset that things aren’t how they usually are this week. That’s fine. Some people don’t deal with change well, but that doesn’t mean we don’t all have to deal with it, period.
Wait, what? Did we read/write the same post? I was totally like “I feel like I should be ridiculing this guy but there’s no reason to ridicule him.” Comparing something to Beverly Hills Chihuahua is the highest honor I can bestow. What do you people want from me!
Brad, remember:
Its expression of dismissal is so amazing. How did the panda do that?!
I’m less amazed by it rocking on a plastic horse. Somehow that seems more usual.
I expected more cat farts. That’s what you said in your first post, cat farts!
I think you need to read more closely.
Play him off, BradOFarrell.
Woah Search Engine Overreaction!
Okay, okay monsters. Clearly things are being switched up a bit this week and chances are I’m not going to enjoy everything that is posted by the guest bloggers, god knows they’re trying though and kudos to them for their efforts and willingness to put forth the time and effort to write for a humor blog. I understand it takes a lot of courage and character to publish your writing for mass consumption and then allow for basically unedited comments. While I’m a bit hesitant to warm up to this whole idea, I’ll simply keep my mouth shut for the rest of the week and recall one important rule:
Sorry Thumper.
What else are should we expect from one of the 19th century’s most notoriously critical editorialists? Keep Biercing it up, Ambrose.
The extra “are” there helps with the SEO.
Somebody studied literature! I will keep Biercing it up until I die in Mexico somewhere.
But do I serve it with a lemon????
Your move, Michael Scott.
Scott Stereogum pretty much had his career path decided for him, but fortunately for us, Gabe Genocidegum wasn’t going to let his surname dictate his life.
MC Meta Tag
Ooo, ooo! Hashtag Team
Lan Party People!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Am i doing this right?
You’re doing it exactly right, CT.
Big Boilean
It’s about time that the rap game moved away from songs about how to make crack to songs about how to make high traffic websites.
,apparently.
I don’t trust raps that teach me stuff. Don’t try to make me a better person with your rhymes!