Photos
No, wait…Everyone come back…it’s ok. It’s me Thisismynightmare. Please, just have seat. We need to talk for a minute. As you know, Gabe is not here today. You might not know this but I am Gabe’s constant (Lost joke!). Also, I am pupsitting Birdie. Well, one of those two things is a lie. I’ll let you figure out which one. The point is that you guys are stuck with me today.
Some of you may know me because you follow me on Twitter (Plug: @dismynightmare) and are familiar with my tweet barrages (that’s a barrage of tweets). Also, you might have seen me hanging out in Videogum chat every day, all day. More than likely, you all know me as the frequent commenter on THIS VERY SITE. I am Monster through and through. As a Monster, I am currently working on getting my EGOT. All I need now is Editor’s Choice. I am looking at you, Gabe.
Several of you may be asking yourselves, “How is she qualified to be filling in for Gabe?” Well, the answer is easy…I’M NOT! I am just girl in her mid-twenties who lives in Louisiana with her husband (that douchey commenter that goes by The Narrator) and our two Dachshunds (Hi, Sage and Zat–follow them on Twitter!–oh wait, they don’t have accounts, oops!). I am living proof that dreams do come true, you guys! I may not be a professional blogger, but damn it, I love this website and all you Monsters. Isn’t that enough?!
When I was invited to fill in today, I was just as shocked as some of you. I was convinced Gabe was a Nigerian Prince who was trying to steal all my money. Good news, he is NOT a Nigerian prince.
I am going to try my best to bring you guys the latest in memes. Everyone relax and enjoy the day! I am just a girl standing in front of a blog, asking them not to throw rotten vegetables at me if I mess up. If I do, please send all hate mail to Gabe.
Oh, Werttrew, I almost forgot…Will being a guest editor count towards my EGOT?
 |
 |
Yay nightmare! This shall be a great day.
Give yourself editor’s choice, problem solved.
PARTY PEOPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
YEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TAG TEAM BACK AGAIN!!!! But really, Tag Team’s back again.
The question really is … can you choose yourself for Editor’s Choice? I know it’s masturbatory, but if it gets the job done, is there any harm in it?
“I know it’s masturbatory, but if it gets the job done, is there any harm in it?”
Yes, but it will make her go blind.
Small price to pay.
“I know it’s masturbatory, but if it gets the job done, is there any harm in it?” My goal today is to casually slip this into my lecture on Romanticism. Can’t wait to get fired!!!
Who is this “Nightmare” person?
She’s a killer on Words with Friends, from what I hear… (Ouch. My pride…)
Make sure you pay attention to those exclamation points. They reflect IRL volume.
*Starts slow clap*
But please, do not forget your MOBFD duties! Monsters depend on you!
I hope you have the time of your life.
I’m also kind of jealous and plan on becoming obsessed with you, Black Swan-style…
This is one of the first Mondays I’ve looked forward to in a long time!
I’ve known Nightmare since she was knee high to a grasshopper and now she’s all growed up.
what’s an egot?
It is an old, old wooden ship.
Wait, I’ve just been informed that it is a reference to having an Emmy, Grammy, Oscar, and a Tony win under your belt, and applied by Videogum monsters to having placed at some time in all categories of the Monster’s Ball.
i liked the old, wooden ship answer better.
p.s. thanks.
What is this avatar? It is mesmerising.
Teacherman, I am so, so, so disappointed in you. Deeky’s avatar is the venerable Admiral Ackbar, one of the great leaders of the assault on Death Star II, and historically recognized as the first to discover that the Imperials had lured the Rebels into a trap.
It’s a trap!!!
We need a new term, now that a monster can win Guest Blogger. That is like the Nobel, so maybe NEGOT.
EGNOT? EGONT? ENGOT? Sheesh.
Or we could go Pulitzer: PEGOT. Caldecott–EGOCT? The Man Booker? Olympic Gold?
ignignok?
(Enignot?)
Too soon.
An EGOT, in Videogum terms, is getting Top 5, Lowest Voted, Caption Contest Winner and Editor’s Choice in the Monster’s ball.
An EGOT, in showbiz terms, is winning an Emmy, a Grammy, an Oscar and a Tony.
People who have actual EGOTs: Mel Brooks, Audry Hepburn, Whoopi Goldberg, Liza Minnelli, Barbara Streisand, and Tracy Jordan.
It’s the only thing that make the Grammys culturally relevant.
*makes
**joke recycled from twitter
BLAM! Also, hahaha, Grammys, Eminem? Katy Perry? Train? Hahaha.
But also, Arcade Fire?
I just realized I wasn’t following you on Twitter. My mistake, nightmare. Consider it rectified.
You will now be one of the few to obtain an EGOTG. (The extra G is for Guest Blogger.) Congratulations! You get to write in the big box! Do us proud!
Behind the scenes at Vgum HQ today
[IMG]http://i55.tinypic.com/2n6fd5h.jpg[/IMG]
Yes, that!
SUP E-TWIN!
Welcome Nightmare!
Now, let’s get right to it, because I was counting on this discussion at videogum hq: Are we going to have a thread about that Cee-Lo/Gwynnie performance last night (barrrrfffffffff)? I was counting on this discussion going down today at Videogum HQ.
As if my wife did not already overshadow me enough as a commenter. Now they are letting her be a guest blogger.
People already say “That is the great commenter Nightmare and her pet monkey husband Narrator.”
Now it is going to be “That is the great commenter and guest blogger Nightmare and her pet monkey husband Narrator.”
I’m going to upvote this, but I can’t help feeling Thisismynightmare would have written it better.
Can I just say that I think it’s awesome that you’re married to a girl that willingly goes on Videogum? Where can I find these women in LA?
[Cue MadMen Style Dance Train of women]
If the latter is true, I willingly relinquish my voluntary participation in Videogum.
I should clarify: if we give her another label, it only further cements The Narrator’s role as a pet monkey husband. My actual pet monkey would be offended.
PS. I have a pet monkey.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dpzwbcrKDFs
No reason. Could be anything.
Do Buddha’s nips count as NSFW?
Oh, Werttrew, I almost forgot…Will being a guest editor count towards my EGOT?
Nope.
You know what is incredible? I had a nightmare last night!
Was this it?
No. It involved Spider-Man and a dark forest.
I can’t help but imagine some sort of Spider-Man/Harry Potter mashup scenario.
Oh my God…I just realized that not only will backslapping be allowed today, it will be *officially sanctioned*!
Happy Valentines Day.
So Gabe’s not a Nigerian prince but the verdict is still out as to whether or not he’s stealing all your money?
I’ll withhold the rotten vegetables just as long as you keep making jokes about Lost.
Yaaaaaaaaay!
That’s all. Just yay.
thisismynightmare, you being guest blogger is my dream come true! Please no more Julia Roberts quotes though unless you are making fun of her. Thanks.
Congratulations!
This is gonna be GREAT!!
lol she’s Gabe’s mom
I don’t mean to nit pick on your first day….but why aren’t there 6 posts about the new Radiohead album???
Please see Stereogum.
I don’t want to scare you Nightmare, but I think I saw this movie. Gabe apparently is murdered under mysterious circumstances and quite a bit of evidence seems to implicate you, and your posts here get more erratic and tension-filled as the police start questioning you, but then it turns out Gabe’s not really dead, he killed a stand-in that looked a lot like him and the body was charred beyond recognition so no positive identification could be made, and Gabe is found on a plane bound for Costa Rica wearing a fake mustache and Russell Brand’s 401K money in his suitcase that he’d blackmailed him out of… Meanwhile you are still somehow tied to the tragedy in a lot of people’s minds, so you eventually get a nose job to hide who you are and wind up on Dancing With The Stars.
This whole guest blogger arrangement is my nightmare.
ditto
Great work nightmare, great posts!
agreed! good job today!
