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Please, if you have anty information that could help bring this ant criminal to ant justice, do not hesitate to contact the ant authorities. (Thanks for the tip, Dusky Panther.)
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This week's five highest rated comments as voted on by you, the lowest rated comment as voted on by you, and the editor's choice.
'Sup, pogs!
Let's all go to the movies, and let's all see the same movie, and let's discuss it here.
Gabe loves fan fiction. You Can Make It Up features his own personal alternate adventures starring some of our favorite characters.
After watching Death Sentence, a terrible movie starring Kevin Bacon as a father in search of vigilante justice directed by Saw's James Wan, Gabe embarked on The Hunt For The Worst Movie of All Time. This is his sad journey.
She’s just training for a spot in the MIB. I’ve already said too much!!
FACT: Most serial killers used to torture animals when they were little. So laugh it up now mom, don’t say I didn’t warn you when you find a skull in your fridge.
That ant was somebody’s aunt.
Why are you guys upvoting this. This is the stupidest joke I’ve heard all week, and I came up with it!
We’re just excited about how good you’re getting at Dad Jokes!
Yeah, make one about Egypt and walking like an Egyptian! Current!
I wasn’t going to until I saw you questioned why others were, then I did out a version of spite that resembles kindness.
There’s Something Wrong With Esther
She purposely wore those deceptive pink shoes of destruction. A baby-blue machete would be far less threatening, inviting even.
Pro tip: Getting your baby shoes bronzed makes for a more efficient killing machine.
A young Hilary Swank impresses the crowds with her knowledge of basic arithmetic.
For sale. Baby shoes. Fully loaded.
i haven’t thought of the morality of killing ants since i was 8 years old, i can’t even remember the last time i SAW an ant, much less felt the natural? urge to stomp on it. like why the fuck do people stomp on ants at first sight, ants aren’t so bad. bad mom in video
Why not? Those fuckers don’t farm, plus if I ripped off their legs they would look like snowmen.
-m.h.
*made my self sad.
Live in Burbank, California long enough and you will wish you could pop ants with your mind. There are ants here. So many ants.
PYM, Henry. of New York, NY; on January 29, 2011. Also known as the superhero Ant Man. He was 40. Survived by ex-wife Janet Pym (née Van Dyne). Services: Saturday- 11 AM at the Carl Miller Funeral Home- 831 Carl Miller Blvd. Camden, NJ where friends may call after 9 AM. Interment: Harleigh Cemetery, Camden, NJ.
I went to middle school with a Janet Pym. She was nice, I’m sorry to hear about this.
This Janet Pym was Janet Van Dyne in middle school. #youmustberelievedtohearthatgum
Say all you want, but don’t you remember the last time we let the ant menace get out of control?
She walks away like a zombie with no remorse. The members of the Videogum jury have reached a verdict, Honorable Judge Gabe Delahaye: GUILTY!
Seriously you guys, we need a lead in the first 48 hours or we may never catch her.
You think that’s ruthless? You do not want to be a slug when this little girl has a shaker of salt.
Her eyes are so cold. Killing comes so easy to her. It gives me chills.
Tiny Ant Detective #1 : “He’s dead sir. Looks like he was stomped to death by that little girl up there.”
Tiny Ant Detective #2: “How could she do this to an innocent bug? Doesn’t she have a conscience?”
Tiny Ant Detective #3: “Well, she may not have a conscience. But she definitely has this murder…
*tiny ant sunglasses*
“… on her sole.”
YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
I already used an applause gif this thread, sorry.
I can’t give you enough upvotes for this.
I know, I google image searched “bag of upvotes” but couldn’t find anything.
This should suffice:
THIMP for the win!
Incredible!
I had what I thought was a pretty good joke, but it’s not showing up? I think it must have gotten caught in the spam filter. Oh, well. Apparently we hate spammers more than we like Copper Boom!
That’s been happening to me if I hotlink a pic. I asked Daniel Plainview his advice:
Nah, it was a joke about the Hemingway six-word short story. I think it got filtered because it said:
“For+sale. Baby shoes. Fully loaded.” without the +, which I guess is spam stuff?
now that’s some good ol’ plain speak
REDRUM
YES! The elitest anti-ant-leaning media would never report on this. Glad it finally got brought to light.
You ant seen nothing yet!
Everybody is overreacting. She clearly says “no” when her mom asks if she “got it”. What we’re looking at here is ATTEMPTED ant murder.
That being said, she still needs to be brought to justice: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e-bRhW6Kz_Q
I believe she says, “Yeah”. Then again, I’m not very adept at transcribing/translating baby talk; especially deranged murderous baby talk.
Next time you post a brutal snuff film, PLEASE use a NSFW tag.
reading Geek Love right now – this just reminded me of the part in the book where Chick stomps on ants. you know, because of all the ant stomping.
It’s okay, the ant was wearing a helmet…
What’s it like to HAVE to post something on the Internet when you have absolutely nothing to say?
She is really a cute girl. I hope she is enjoying herself.
Virigain