Canada seems like a nice enough place. Clean. A functional health care system. Poutine. I’ve never had any desire to live there though. AMERICA FOR AMERICAS! Just kidding. But, seriously, if I wanted to live in a place that was some weird hybrid between the United States, Western Europe, and Permanent Winter I wouldn’t, that sounds weird and cold. Now I am singing a different tune, though, thanks to their new children’s television show, Rastamouse!, about a felt reggae mouse on a skateboard. I’m super into Canada all of a sudden, because that shit is hilarious. Let’s all move there and have children and make our children watch Rastamouse! but do a really bad job of explaining it. Then, when we get bored, we can just put our babies in a free Canadian orphanage and move back to America for season 2 of Justified!
“You know, Gabe, you could just watch the first episode of Rastamouse! after the jump and save yourself the trouble of moving to Canada and starting a family.” HUSH! Go pack your suitcase full of flannel shirts!
Hahahha. Oh, Rastamouse! You’re basically the reason that my make-believe baby is so good at hunting moose! (How do you say “well, this post really went off the rails!” in Candian?) (Thanks for the tip, @bridgetorr.)