I’m very happy for Ted Williams and his newfound success. It’s nice when nice things happen to people! Why not? But what I’m REALLY excited about is all the thousands of homeless people out there who aren’t getting shit today. Thank God! Hopefully this whole Ted Williams situation will be a real kick in the pants for those lazy, unYouTube-able LOSERS. Shoulda had better voices, dorks. Shoulda been more VIRAL. Smoke salvia. SOMETHING. (Via WarmingGlow.)
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I don’t believe this is a question… “What’s it like to go from being homeless and on the side of the road with a sign in your hands, now overnight, you are this sensation and people can’t get enough of you right now…?”
And he is totally the Susan Boyle of our generation.
He should have said, “Well, you know, it sucks. Send me back out to the streets, please.” That’s what I would have said, but I’m a sarcastic bitch, so…
That’s so Mark Zuckerberg of you.
I guess life just isn’t fair.
If it were, he wouldn’t have changed his hair.
Wait–I was told it would at least be fair for me! What now??
Does this mean Barack Obama could speak like that? Because they have pretty similar talking voices.
Agreed. While I’m happy for Ted, he wasn’t the last homeless guy in America. :-/
No he wasn’t, that position will go to my good friend Oscar the Grouch. But he likes it that way.
But he’s definitely the last one who has anything valuable to contribute to society.
Speaking of, I miss the guy who did the Kermit’s Under Pressure.
Are people saying that?? Do you honestly think people are thinking that?? Or does it just feel good to be OUTRAGED!!
Buncha fucking Debbie Downers here.
Calm down.
Calm Downvote
I wasn’t saying I was downvoting anyone (I UPVOTED YOU!! BC ITS IMPORTANT TO NOTE/KNOW THAT!, I just had no where else to deposit that Pun Type Joke… OH WAIT
http://twitter.com/#!/DS3M/status/22741218463059968
The last of the homeless guys has the dubious honor of being the worst of James Fenimore Cooper’s work.
This is super amazing and makes me really happy!
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While I agree with your general sentiment, really, chill out. We’re all just here to party. PARTY!!! HOTDOG PARTY!!!
Really, a downvote? What, someone doesn’t like hotdogs?
ME! Unless veggie dogs are included. Then PARTY ON.
P.S. Please think of all the alcoholic diabetic monsters before throwing a party, k?
Nope, pretty sure I am on the right website…Thanks for your concern though.
It’s easy to get lost. There are literally SO MANY TUBES to try, it can be confusing. But I’m glad you found your way home.
Speaking of great voices… How’s Casey Kasem doing? Scooby Doo…forever.
At first, I felt bad that the anchors were making him say things like a dog doing tricks and then i thought, well…thats why he’s famous now so why not…..he should be thankful.
“I have a great idea, guys. Let’s take him off the street, clean him up and make him look like an average, healthy, non-homeless-looking man… and then amaze audiences with how normal he sounds! Wow!” -CBS Execs
At least they didn’t give him a sitcom: Shit My Homeless Guy Says (with His Awesome Voice).
If this teaches anyone anything, it should teach the homeless to put their talents on their signs so that someone with a video camera can upload it to youtube. Then we can get them all jobs. LOOK AT ME EVERYONE! I’M SOLVING THE HOMELESS PROBLEM AND THE ECONOMY!
And the homeless people without talents should just stay on the streets forever
We need classes, know your role.
Obviously. I live my life like it’s Star Search. You lose, you fade into obscurity. You win… Well, you get the idea.
The America that watches morning shows like their homeless like they like their black people: non-threatening and somewhat magical.
The perfect storm:

Non-threatening? Magical? Black? Morning Show? I think I know just the guy.
since when does putting on an articulate STEREOtypical (seewhatididthereifyouwill) accent and sounding like an articulate stereotypical radio guy make stereotypical news guys on national television get all orgasmy
‘I just want to hear your voice…’
‘SAY YOUR OWN NAME BITCH!’
Because you never actually see radio DJs? Because you’re used to that booming voice coming out of a small box instead of an actual human? I’m failing to see how the fascination with voices like this is confusing.
Remember that Geico ad with all the voiceover people? Or when Letterman has Casey kasem on to read numbers: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vbMfqgGBCYU
zoom out further though.
what is weirder:
seeing the person do the cartoon voice you’ve heard for years? sure, that’s weird, and always fun.
human beings considering that being able to do the stereotypical radio voice is a GOD-given gift? that’s DEFINITELY weird (and mostly with not-cool implications)
being an adult in front of millions of people and geeking out about the fact that a dude sounds like the stereotypical radio voice? no, yeah, that’s officially also weird my friend
How is a voice like this not a gift (God-given or otherwise?) Having a “voiceover voice” is a skill that cannot be trained, and countless people have made very comfortable livings off of it. Name another profession where you can easily (yes, easily) pull in 6 figures a year without any sort of training or practice, simply because of a trait you were born with? There’s modeling and voiceover.
So yes, I’d consider a voice like this a gift. After all, he’d still be homeless without it.
like I said, zoom out more
sure, all the randomness and coincidences of the universe fell into place to give this dude a job in the last day. yep. in fact, the only reason this story is in the news today is that the randomness and coincidences of the universe worked out for this dude.
but happening to have a voice that sounds like a thing is a pretty shallow thing to treasure and call a gift.
how about Diana Rehm dude? doesn’t exactly have a radio voice. has a show because she’s a smart, interesting person, instead of a someone who randomly had a thing that made other people think of another thing…
also, fuck you
…and porn. There is also porn.
I think it’s more about the nice story than the voice itself. He seems genuine enough and while I tend to bristle when people thank god too much about stuff I don’t think god really thinks about, I’m happy for this guy. I’m not sure this is any more of a gift than the hand model lady, but since this guy doesn’t say stuff that makes him seem like an egomaniacal nightmare, I’m cool with him.
Just to clarify a little- It actually DOES take training and practice to be a good VT. Jussayin’.
Hotdog Party: I know that it takes training and practice. After I posted I reread it and it should have read something like this: “Something that ultimately cannot be achieved through training or practice.” Definitely not an easy job.
And BackWaxer, I don’t even know where you’re going with this argument. But you’re right. Fuck this fucking asshole, he doesn’t deserve any of this, all he is is a voice that sounds like another voice. Instead of derailing his life with drugs and alcohol he instead should have gone to grad school and gotten a show on NPR. It all makes sense now. Why didn’t this shallow fucking idiot think of that??
And hey, “Fuck You Too” – Gwneyth Paltrow.
where I was always going is where almost every funny or insightful idea ever comes from – saying “isn’t this thing that just happened kind of weird?”
you were the one playing devil’s advocate with that, like you were with everyone on the page for whatever they said.
I validated your point, and admitted there were LOTS of things to notice and call weird
but then you just told me I was flat out wrong
chill out. smoke some pot dude. none of the people that you told were wrong actually were wrong, in whatever we said.
I don’t know, I look at it like some people just have amazing voices that you could listen to read a phone book, like Morgan Freeman. This guy has one of those voices.
in the span of 48 hours: dead birds, and this guy. is he an apostle?
The real tragedy is, his appeal as a person of interest only lasts as long as he remains homeless.
“Your voice is amazing, everyone loves you!”
“Can I have a place to sleep now?”
“Hell no, that would kill the appeal”
He has a job and a place to sleep now because of all the evil, spiteful people on the internet.
http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/technology/trending-tech/homeless-man-with-voice-of-gold-has-chance-at-redemption/article1857936/
Actually. Better link: http://sports.nationalpost.com/2011/01/05/cavaliers-give-homeless-man-with-radio-voice-a-job-house/
GOOD JOB, INTERNET!
You can be sarcastic, but how is this not a “Goob Job, Internet” situation? Does the internet need to solve the entire problem of homelessness in America to please you?
Yes.
Okay, I wasn’t going to give an earnest response because it’s not an earnest question, but the more I think about this, the more it bothers me. Good for Ted Williams. I’m really happy for him. And way to go, everyone who helped him out. But enough! This story is everywhere, and it’s one guy.
I’m extremely passionate when it comes to homelessness. I volunteer 15 hours a week at various shelters and missions in my city. I work to get people housing and employment every fucking week – families, veterans, teenagers, hopeless drug addicts, etc. I don’t do it to feel good about myself, or to brag about how selfless I am. I do it because it’s a fucking problem that there is this level of poverty in one of the wealthiest nations in history.
I regularly work with people who DON’T have a charming skill that will generate faux-sympathetic YouTube hits from bored white-collar 20-somethings whose only brush with poverty was the three months they only ate ramen noodles and only drank PBR while paying off student loans. Some of them don’t have any skills whatsoever, aside from an uncanny ability to sniff out drugs. These are real people, just like Ted Williams. They have stories to share, jokes to tell, and the potential and often drive to contribute to society.
Still, I wasn’t being entirely sarcastic when I said “good job, internet.” Seriously, good job, internet! Now shut up, internet.
I don’t want to be condescending, but have you considered chilling the fuck out?
That was to Duke Nukem, not That One. Good job, That One. I’m proud of you.
I like how he made more money than me while he was on the streets…that make me proud of myself
Maybe I’m in the minority, but I liked him better with the Khan haircut.
Seconded
At least now they can finally make a Pursuit of Happyness 2.
Pursuit of Happyness 2: Electric Boogaloo
I don’t think he has the necessary Rubik’s Cube skills to make it at a Fortune 500 company
But he plays a mean Karaoke Revolution…so that’s gotta count for something.
Anyone else besides me think this was Nic Cage at first?!
If only everyone suffering in our world had golden pipes things might be better.
Clean drinking water would be abundant and plentiful.
Actually, if everyone had golden pipes they’d probably just be using them as currency.
I’m still failing to see a downside here.
“Golden Pipes delivering Golden Showers, as far as the eye can see…”
Reddit: Hey, look everybody! Let’s do something nice!
The World: Yeah! Cool! Woohoo! Thank goodness! It’s been rough lately!
Reddit: Alright, let’s do this!
Every Blog: WAIT WAIT WAIT A MINUTE… Uh, hold on a second… I think… Yep. I think we’re gonna need to take a shit on this.
Everyone: …
Videogum: EERrrRRrrrrreeeaahhhhhhhh… *Plop* Yeahhh…
Everyone: *slinks back into despondent abyss*
These anchorpeople sound like those anchorpeople.
Why is it that we are presented with a story of a guy who has overcome very difficult problems, found recognition for his talents, managed to escape adversity, and has expressed humility and true appreciation for his blessings, and yet we still manage to turn it into an opportunity to complain and fight? It is not possible for us to be happy for this guy and accept that his path is not going to work for everyone?
Honestly, this should not be an occasion for sarcastic bitching. If you see this video and it makes you want to help the homeless, volunteer or make a donation. Otherwise, be happy for this man. He deserves his moment.
I am happy for this man, Godsauce. I also have been getting weird urges to imagine him relapsing into a drug spiral after becoming successful. NOT THAT I WANT HIM TO. I think part of it is that I myself am still unemployed even though I sound JUST LIKE HIM, and the other part is I don’t know anything about Ted Williams other than he went to school to fine-tune his voice, developed a nasty drug problem, became homeless, then was helped up by becoming a viral video sensation and now he’s back on top. I have no idea what success will do to Ted Williams, and I hope he stays level-headed and true to himself and everything he’s worked for and struggled through… but he’s still an addict and addicts can relapse, and for some reason that’s what I’m thinking about right this instant.
NOT THAT I WANT HIM TO AT ALL. Go, Ted Williams, GO! You can DO it!
(P.S. BTW, I don’t have his voice at all, I just said that to sound cool)
I think what you are hearing is the sincere and justified frustration that is the outcome of living in a society that has failed to support its citizens of least means; that effective support must be a feature of a society on a structural level; that this man’s trajectory highlights the cruelty of our current system (in that he had to be considered exceptional to get assistance); that the cruelty of the system is ultimately the salient issue here; that an obsession with unusual outcomes easily distracts us from improving the system and the overall lives of everyone; that corporate interests seek to distract us by blowing up these exact kind of narratives so that they can continue enriching themselves w/o reprimand.
Or something.
Well said. I totally hear you on that, rajma. Way to put it in perspective. I was thinking about it, but it was still on the periphery, if you know what I’m saying.
See, I can get behind this. I
I’m not sure about that. I think that what we are seeing in this video and the previous one is an object lesson in self-improvement and personal responsibility. There are a few things about this guy’s story that are easy to overlook in the context of the spectacle: 1) Early in his life, he invested great time and energy into developing the voice for which he is now being lauded. 2) His trajectory is dependent on his successfully being able to recover from his addictions. 3) He testified in the video that he was already on the right track and improving his situation before this attention arrived.
Now I’m not going to make any blanket statements about the homeless. I’ve been homeless (briefly, and due mainly to pride), and I’ve seen the variety of stories and causes. But I will say that to lay blanket blame on society for being cruel or even insufficiently charitable is as reductive as saying it’s all their own fault. We could debate the causes and solutions to such problems, and I think we would agree that it is sincerely and justifiably frustrating.
Those frustrations are certainly a part of the reason that there is so much negativity here, but they doesn’t really excuse tainting a happy moment with poisonous cynicism. I think that what I am hearing is a chorus of self-righteous bitching that helps no one and robs everyone of at least a part of what is good about this story.
Now, I do not believe for a moment that the attention that this gentleman is receiving is some sort of corporate conspiracy to distract from the homeless problem. He’s on CBS because people were already drawn to him. His presence on television might even make it more difficult for people to ignore that there are people in need. This could be channeled toward positive energy, prompting the good people here to try to make a difference, but the tone instead seems to say, “Someone else should have fixed the world already.” That is a bullshit attitude.
I am not suggesting that anyone here is a bad person or has bad motives, but it would would be nice if we could be, at least for a moment, as unconditionally happy for this man’s joy as we seem to be for a shoe full of kittens. At the least, it would be nice if we could channel the conditions of our conditional happiness into something that will actually improve the world instead of making it more bitter.
I’m pleased as riot punch to see you back on here, Godauce. I have no idea how the internet twists things around at times, but I don’t like it!
Thank you, sir!
Why can’t we be happy for Ted Williams, and also be sad and frustrated at the weird situation that helped create “Ted Williams”?
I don’t think most of the people here are just cynically bummed that the world’s not perfect yet. I think people are weirded out that Ted Williams got help from the internet not because he was homeless but because he had a quirky, meme-ready talent that made for a good viral video. That he was only helped because he made for a good spectacle, and now everyone gets a nice feel-good story to bask in. Because that really is a weird and sad and frustrating situation, even if it is a very good outcome for Ted Williams that we are all happy about.
Literally everyone in America is happy for Ted Williams. It’s just that some people are also sad and frustrated that Ted Williams only got help because he was deemed meme-worthy enough to deserve it. There is certainly cynicism in that response, and we should probably all just accept the fact of life that some people will luck into help and that’s not a bad or a good thing it’s just The Way It Is, so we should all just be happy when it happens and quietly resolve to help the unlucky at least a little bit. Still though. The whole thing does just seem kind of weird and sad and frustrating, and I don’t think that’s an unreasonably bitter response.
I agree that your response is not unreasonably bitter, and I salute you for voicing it.
Yes, the tone of this post and the following comments made me sad. The world is terrible, we all know it, there’s nothing wrong with being happy about small things on occasion.
I don’t find anything to be bitter about here. Does it really matter at all how someone betters their respective situation, as long as they aren’t hurting anyone? To complain about the manner in which he was discovered and received help is forced cynicism, and to extrapolate that outlook onto the “system” as a whole is simply a way to prevent anything from ever actually changing. This is the system we have, and it is better than almost every system that came before it. It is terribly imperfect, and it is always going to be imperfect. We can work on improving it over time, but this meme is not indicative of anything wrong, quite the opposite actually. We are seeing here a brand new way in which people that have a better chance of improving their station in life can get attention that highlights their ability to function and receive the help that they need. After Ted Williams, think of all the other countless homeless that are not insane and can actually turn their lives around with the benefit of a helping hand that comes with greater exposure. This type of thing can be replicated and continue to help time and time again, and the fact that white collar types show a passing interest in this, while not doing much, does spread the word about individuals, and in the smallest way actually does help. Just because they don’t help enough by someone’s standards doesn’t mean that help doesn’t count!
True, this doesn’t address all the other homeless that don’t have any qualities, whether those qualities are superficial or not is besides the point. This does help diminish the number of homeless, spread the word that they are individuals with merits of their own, and not to be seen as a single mass of people that are beyond help and worthless. Because of this, there is one less homeless person that needs help, and more can get it. It is a small step, but it’s a fucking step nonetheless, and all the cynicism about this is nothing more than a way to prevent ANY steps from ever being taken. It’s not good enough so therefore fuck it, let’s not do anything until we have a solution that will probably never come. Though that might not be a cognizant thought of the cynics, that is the sentiment underneath their consciousness.
Fuck using a false sense of moral superiority to mask bitterness that decries the problem while simultaneously perpetuates it. Who cares if some people turn this into a spectacle, he has a home and a job now.
Good job, internet! No sarcasm here.
Because the white guilt and post-post irony group think here means nothing good can exist without scorn.
I mean, maybe it’s just me, since I understand and identify with a lot of the recovery lingo Ted says (and that’s enough of that); but I don’t understand how anyone watches that video of this sincere, emotional, forthright and talented man grateful to catch a break and the opportunity to COOK HIS OWN FOOD IN HIS OWN APARTMENT, only to turn around and say, “but you know, there are still homeless people out there, and those network anchors sure are condescending jerks, and YouTube is still a black hole, and 2012 take us away.”
I would hope that it’s axiomatic Ted Williams didn’t deserve to be homeless because NOBODY deserves to be homeless, and this instance doesn’t wave a magic wand to solve the larger socio-economic problems of homelessness and drug addiction, but come on: it’s a new year, take what you can get that, for however uncomfortable some of the particulars may be, that someone who actually deserved a break caught one in this nonsensical, bewildering world. How did this come back to “the moral of this story is: the internet is still obnoxious?”
Yup. That is the moral. Pretty ridiculous.
I mean, if people are going to use Ted Williams to complain that it’s not all the homeless that are now radio announcers, just one homeless, then they are just shitting in Ted Williams’ success’ cereal.
Good News Sharer: “Hey guys! We finally got running water to this poor village wrought with dysentery!”
The Internet: “There are still a bunch of villages that don’t have it, so shut up.”
SHIT. After reading rajma’s reply to godsauce, I just realized my comparison is flawed.
The real example is-
Good News Sharer: “Hey guys! A poor village wrought with dysentery became an internet sensation and now people want to help out that one village!”
The Internet: “What about all the other villages with dysentery? Are there plans to help them out?”
Good News Sharer: “You know what? That’s a good question! I’ll have to get back to you on that!”
Why can’t we acknowledge that there is still a large structural problem and there are lots of homeless people while celebrating the fact that this guy has a great voice and a HOME? Why does the first thing have to be the focal point? It just seems like you’re being a grump just to be a grump, GABE.
Beat that, Mayor Carcetti and your crusade for the homeless…
Not gonna let anyone ruin this story. It’s heartwarming, and sweet, and makes me wanna cry, and hopefully it’ll show that homeless people aren’t scary–they’re normal monsters like you and me! You go, Ted Williams.
you’re right , all homeless people should be given radio gigs!
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Do you ever make jokes here, or do you just complain?
Do you ever think for yourself or do you just blindly follow Fearless Leader Gabe? I agree with everything Duke Nukem has said in this thread. If you don’t agree with him, maybe just ignore him? It seems you’re getting pretty offended that someone has a dissenting opinion!
I just blindly follow Fearless Leader Gabe Exclamation Point!!!
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1. nah, coming onto someone’s website to tell them they are annoying is not something anyone should be glad of. if it’s important to the world, then tell them they are spreading factually incorrect things, ie lies about healthcare… but no, you should not be glad someone is coming on to tell someone else that they are annoying. you’re stupid.
2. this dude not pointing anything real out though. in every case he is throwing around a bunch of strawmen arguments that people are not saying. pointing out the fact that people make new years resolutions and don’t keep them is “sarcastically belittling.” it’s a basic, simple, regular old joke. you’re stupid.
that should have read – his joke ISN’T sarcastically belittling
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I’m sure it’s dumb to jump into this fray, but Gabe is the sole writer for this site. If he’s often annoying, why read him? I mostly stick to bloggers I like.
This is a sincere question by the way, and not one directed specifically at you–you are definitely not the first person to say that, and it’s just something I’m curious about. It must be the comments?
By that I mean, it must be the comments section that attracts people who don’t necessarily care for Gabe’s writing style.
That’s an easy one – he is often very funny and so are the videos. I don’t know Gabe, so this next statement I am clearly pulling out of my ass. But I think of him in kind of the same vein as David Cross – observant, ferociously witty, white-guilt ridden, and insufferable. But I own every David Cross album because he makes me laugh. Doesn’t mean I want to hang out with him though.
Cool! Thank you for the answer!
I was all like,
chriskc80 – I didn’t mean to sound so angry or mean there. sorry. it’s a perfectly valid point (that I saw coming, so I wish i hadn’t made the point I made) that since you like some of his jokes and not others, you’re open to the idea that people would openly take issue with the tone of some of his jokes, and willing to support them.
I don’t agree that there was anything mean-spirited in what Gabe wrote today, and I don’t believe Duke Nukem is being genuine that he thinks there was, or at all logical in the way he tried to point it out.
but that was him, not you. you made a fair point. sorry dude.
Sorry I blew my top there, skipper.
you didn’t. you were just defending yourself. i blew a top. my bad.
I’m sure Gabe hurt so many scrawny feelings when he typed that into his iPhone with his biceps. What a monster.
i’m wonder when he gets autotuned..
It will be the most dulcet of all the autotunes.
Steelo, I just cracked a rib laughing at your avatar. Thanks a lot. Now I have to devote fifteen minutes to reading about Missy again.
One more thing, and then I’m gonna go take a nap: People who complain about people complaining don’t strike me as happy; rather, they seem like people of ambiguous temper who are highly defensive of happiness as a concept– like cheerleaders of a narrow set of prescribed emotional responses– as if happiness weren’t a transitory and arguably kind of trivial state (in contrast with contentment or satisfaction).
But the ideas that only happy people get things done or that people who are not happy are in the way of human progress seem silly, and not actually supported by global trends.
Real talk!
Some of you are so cynical, but I for one am glad they found a cure for his disease, cured him, thawed his head, and found a body to re-attach it to.
The Smoking Gun with the buzzkill:
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/celebrity/meet-felon-golden-voice
Absolutely. It is unconceivable to me that a desperate person with zero resources would ever behave with anything less than total dignity and honor. While he has become a marginal celebrity, he should definitely go to prison forever instead.
That’s what homeless people have to do when the media doesn’t swoop in to help them.