Photos
This mash-up of Donald Duck and Glenn Beck was e-verywhere this weekend. Fair enough. It’s always nice to see a mash-up that doesn’t involve fucking Star Wars. Although I’m not sure how many people actually watched the whole eight minutes. That’s too many minutes. This is the Internet, not the ACTUAL 1930s. Anyway:
Did you guys read the New York Times profile of Glenn Beck this weekend? This was my favorite part:
“We hate Woodrow Wilson,” another woman called out. This is like a secret handshake among Beck followers, who have heard his diatribes about the evils of our 28th president, a father of the Progressive Era. “I hate him,” Beck affirmed for the Woodrow Wilson-hating women at the Kennedy Center. “I hate that guy.”
I mean, it definitely ties into this part, which is less hilarious:
In his quest to root out progressives, Beck compared himself to Israeli Nazi-hunters. “To the day I die I am going to be a progressive-hunter,” he vowed on his radio show earlier this year. “I’m going to find these people that have done this to our country and expose them. I don’t care if they’re in nursing homes.”
The idea of vilifying progressives and also a man feeling so flush with confidence as to make unapologetic comparisons between people whose purported claim (whether you agree with it or not) to make the country a better place through the more equitable distribution of wealth to FUCKING NAZIS is really gross! But the idea of a bunch of Glenn Beck fans wandering around the country just being so mad at Woodrow Wilson, who died in 1924, and who won the Nobel Peace Prize for, you know, the whole bringing an end to WORLD WAR I thing, is hilarious to me. YEAH, MAN, FUCK THAT GUY! THERE ARE A BUNCH OF PEOPLE FROM 300 YEARS AGO THAT JUST GET MY BLOOD SO BOILING. (Via BoingBoing, TheHighDefinite, TheDailyWhat, GotchaMedia, Gawker, and BuzzFeed.)
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The former, Bing. Always the former.
Woodrow Wilson was president of the racist club Glenn, not only do you not hate him but he is your boyfriend
Yeah, someone should tell Glenn Beck that he and Wilson have very similar attitudes towards minority admissions in universities.
I believe this video opens the door for me to quit my job to write Donald Duck/Glenn Beck slash fiction full time.
(it mostly involves pantsless sailor outfits)
“Progressives speak of putting ‘the common good’ before the individual, which ‘is exactly the kind of talk that led to the death camps in Germany,’ as he said on his show in May.”
Or you know, which is exactly like the shit some bro named JESUS preached in the BIBLE.
I had the same thought. I like Glen Beck because he doesn’t let reason or fact get in his way. Also, Obama is a racist because he’s black.
see, glenn beck just sounds like my demented grandfather, so i don’t get that much amusement out of it anymore. if only we could all band together and get beck put into a home. that would make all of our lives easier.
I intended to watch this, but I just hate Glenn Beck so, so much. I’m afraid I’d never look at Donald the same way again.
I was going to watch it, too, but I am afraid it’s going to involve Donald Duck being a crazy fundamentalist, and Glenn Beck not wearing pants.
Not to worry, *spoiler alert* Donald Duck triumphs over Glenn Beck in the end!
“I hate James Buchanan”
(This is our secret handshake yes?)
I was watching Olbermann back in the Bush days, and he called Bush “the worst president since Buchanan.” I had to look it up, but it turned out to be pretty apt.
Everybody must list people from 300 years ago that piss you off! Fuck Edward Teach! Bearded pirates suck!
Why stop at 300 years? Join my campaign against that locust and honey munching Commie, John the Baptist!
The unshaven beast!
Fucking Sophocles. You think you’re better than me cause you won the Dionysia like 100 times. Gaaaaaaaaiiiiiiyyyyyyyeeeeee!
Upvotes for speaking the Changuage.
I’m running my campaign for Governor on the platform that Clarence Nash was a nazi
Mickey Mouse: Loveable Cartoon Character or Anti-capitalist Communist Pig?
Um. BLAM?
Also, Scrooge McDuck is doing commercials for Goldline.
He’s got to be the upper 10% in Duckburg
Ah man. When I first heard about this video, I thought they meant a Donald Duck and BECK mash-up.
Yeesh. Mondays.
Yeah, Woodrow Wilson, who created the League of Nations, which was the predecessor to the United Nations, bringing peace to war-torn Europe. What an asshole! Fuck that guy!
How is my comment awaiting moderation, but Gabe can post a mash-up of a pantsless duck and a man-child bigot whenever he wants?
Oh Phooey.
At Least it Wasn’t Something TRULY Awful, like, Say, Rush Limbaugh On Family Guy?
Wait, What? That Happened? Ok, That Happened.
I accidentally caught about 3 minutes of this, and was so confused.
Were they trying to say that people who haven’t read Limbaugh’s books shouldn’t judge him? Because I’m sure he’s said enough terrible things on his FUCKING RADIO SHOW that qualify him for being the worst.
I don’t know if they made any actual arguments later in the episode, since like I said, I watched 3 minutes, and that filled my monthly family guy quota.
tl;dw
You know who I hate? James A. Garfield! Fuck that guy!
Millard Fillmore, also a huge douchebag
On the other hand, you know who i love/am in love with?
Chester A. Arthur
I recognize him as my president with all of the fervor Beckheads hate Wilson. Also I recognize him as my boyfriend.
http://www.whitehouse.gov/sites/default/files/first-family/masthead_image/14fp_header_sm.jpg?1251138522
um, hellloooooo franklin pierce. you can pierce me anytime.
YES. I have such a crush on Franklin Pierce. He was so emo. I used to drive my US History AP teacher insane talking about Franklin Pierce.
There’s a statue to Chester A. Arthur at Union College in Schenectady, NY (he was a graduate) and he’s buried not too far away in Albany, NY. Make a pilgrimage!
Not only should I do that, but I should do that.
Look At This Fucking President.
Chester A Arthur, really? You stalwart! I bet you paid Garfield’s assassin.
Also, Wilson was governor of NEW JERSEY…’nough fucking said.
What are you saying about my beloved homeland?
Next they’ll pair Donald with Hitler…
OH WAIT.
But also this:
Let us not forget this:
Disney be racist, y’all.
That escaped gorilla episode of Donald Duck was the greatest, I used to watch it all the time.
To be fair, Woodrow Wilson was a pretty vile racist. Glenn Beck is still Looney Tunes.
This cartoon is good propaganda because it makes me hate Glenn Beck. Glenn Beck is good propaganda because he makes me hate Glenn Beck.
So the other morning I got in the elevator at work, and the doors had almost closed when a beefy arm or two forced them back open, and two bodyguards with earwires and Glenn Beck step in. Obviously he doesn’t stick his own arm in the elevator doors like a jerk – he has people who do that for him.
If you ever wonder what you would do if you’re ever confined in a small space with someone you truly loathe and hold partially responsible for an organized effort to destroy decades of social progress and erode the fundamental decency and honesty on which the functioning of civil society depends – for me it looks like the answer is: stand in the corner silently, giving them the stinkeye and trying not to have a panic attack while they talk about parking in Manhattan.
The end.
Ugghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh you must have had such rage crackling upon your nerve endings.
This gives me a mild case of the sympathy nauseas.
Right, that was supposed to be a reply to potatotoes, but whatever.
FUCK
…if it wasn’t bad enough that Donald fell under Glenn’s sway, now Mickey’s running for office on a clearly Beckian platform.