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This guy has something to say about Toys R Us, so it’s obviously NSFW. Headphones UP.
I was with him up until he started complaining about the jungle gym, but when he started complaining about the jungle gym, he lost me. Of course that jungle gym can’t support your “fat ass.” IT’S FOR CHILDREN, MUCH LIKE ALMOST EVERYTHING INSIDE THE STORE YOU WILL NOT STOP COMPLAINING ABOUT. At first he seemed to understand this, and had plenty of very important and interesting things about the state of modern childhood, but as with most unhinged rants, it quickly devolved into a demonstration of his own self-absorption. It’s a typical unhinged rant problem, but just because it is typical doesn’t make it any less of a problem. STAY FOCUSED, LUNATICS. (Thanks for the tip, werrtrew.)
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Toys-R-Notdesignedforadults
Silly Angry black man,
Toys-R-4-Kids
Say what you will Gabe but he’s a perfect gentleman once we’ve stopped by Meds R Us.
Many up votes for you sir
He seems nice.
He seems hilarious.
Apparently, the creator of this video and I have different opinions on what “strong cuss words” are.
It’s not his fault he doesn’t want to grow up, Gabe. He’s a victim of marketing. He will always be a Toys ‘R Us Kid.
I believe this an attempt at viral marketing by the struggling coloring book industry.
Your family really wishes your boyfriend would take that job at his uncle’s insurance agency but you know that he’s pursuing his ART as an ARTIST. It makes his balls feel good!
Wait, what is my boyfriend doing with coloring sheets? Honesty and sharing interests are important in a relationship, I know, but sometimes there is such a thing as too much honesty and sharing. Yikes.
Do you think his friends in car know and understand his love of coloring sheets?
Right after he said that about the coloring book pages, I realized why he wasn’t in the Toys-R-Us, but about 100 court-mandated feet away from it.
“Я”EST”Я”AINING O”Я”DE”Я”
In Toys R Us’ defense it is not called Coloring Books Are Us
Also, he probably shouldn’t be so hard on Mario.
Mario’s plenty hard on himself:
I wish I could give you more upvotes for this.
The auto-tuned version of this preemptively hit #12 on Billboard’s Hot 100 and my grandmother has it as her jitterbug ringtone.
This comment already won editor’s choice, in my (coloring) book.
This is 3x better than the auto-tune joke I was going to say.
#late-to-the-party-gum
He’s gonna be pissed when he discovers they only have Mario-Driving-an-Escalade-themed coloring books.
While I was watching this, Mans’ mash-up of CopperCab and Burial started replaying. The rollercoaster of emotions I was feeling during this were just….. it was the triple rainbow. I have seen it.
Is the second single of Cee-Lo’s new album?
89 results for “Crayons” on toysrus.com. Perhaps the problem lies in you being a large angry man screaming at the cashier “YOU AIN’T GOT NO DAMN COLORS?”.
- Appearing this Monday at the Hollywood Improv
In his defense, I agree that coloring books make my balls feel good.
I’m so glad he said what I was thinking, in a public forum, plus all those n-words!
hahahahahhahahahahaha midgets high fiving and doing backflips
“This ain’t no good-ass working-class organization”
He says what we’re all thinking. Because we’re all psychotic.
“Dude, you HAVE no coloring books”
Omg, the ouroboros is almost full!
The line between The Worst and The Best is thin indeed.
In England, coloring has a “u” and crayons are called “lorries”.
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Classy Dude, glad he’s our boyfriend.
Way to ruin the end of Toy Story 3 for me. I guess I don’t have to watch it now.
woah!
SPOILER ALERT! He’s actually wrong about that.
Although it does turn out that Buzz is Keyser Soze and Woody was Bruce Willis’s ghost the whole time. And other twist ending jokes.
I haven’t seen Toy Story 3, guess I don’t need to now! I has a sad.
My boyfriend needs to learn the phrase “spoiler alert”.
He really does. I got 100% sad because he ruined that for me. i was waiting to watch it on dvd….I hate Toys R’ Us.
Don’t worry. See above.
I’m vastly more interested in post Blankenship discussion than listening to some insane asshole run his mouth. That’s just me of course.
As the father of two 6-year-old children, I have to stand in support of, well, pretty much every word of this guy’s rant.
Monopoly really is a stupid bitch-ass boardgame.
… that takes fifteen hours to play and is longer than Bioshock 2.
Monopoly is a game of attrition.
Next time someone makes the boring comment “I wonder what happened to Kel of Kenan and Kel” I’m going to refer them to this video and say five hundred godamn Goodburgers happened to him and he really needs to get off the orange soda.
I fucking love this guy.
I’m just glad to hear that there are still people out there who are brave enough to insist upon the $1.92 price cap on balls. This $2.52 business is bulls**t.
maybe when he’s referring to his “fat ass” he’s referring his son(?) in the car?
that’s how he introduces him to people too,
“this is my fatass, chris.”
Toys R Us basically made it out unscathed but he was so on about Bioshock 2.
Mother Fuckers don’t have no magical markers in this bitch.
New York’s hottest club is Toys-R-Us. This place has everything*. Pregnant whales on steroids, midgets high-fiving, doing back flips, Mexican Barbie dolls and four year olds in Escalades.
*They don’t have coloring books.