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Nice try, video stores. Looks like someone has not heard about Netflix’s new “Tan Instantly” program. (Other jokes include: what is a video store?)
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My family used to go to South Carolina to visit my grandparents when I was a kid, and as you can imagine, it was super-boring. I LOVED going to the video store, which was this dirty/strange place that rented videos, sold fishing equipment and bait, and even had some hard-to-find beanie babies under the glass counter. It was a magical and confusing place.
My grandmother lived across the street from a Video Store/Restaurant/Ice Cream Parlor in West Virginia and when I was a kid I loved that place. But I don’t think their selection of tapes changed at all from about 1988 to 1999, and I’m not sure if they ever started carrying DVDs.
The convenience store up the street from me in college had an extensive Bollywood video rental section (this is not a joke)
In Montreal, I lived above a dep (basically a little convenience mart) run by a guy who clearly had been an astrophysicist or something in China, and had moved to Montreal to sell cigarettes to meth addicts and beer to me while learning French and English at the same time.
He actually had a wall with a rotating selection of DVDs, and one day I noticed that there was a line of black, unlabeled DVD cases, and picked one up to have a look.
That was the day I found out they also carried a small collection of hardcore porn. It also happened to be the day that his wife was there, helping their 4 year old daughter with kindergarten homework or something, and I felt like a sleaze.
There used to be a place in Midtown East, like maybe 2nd Avenue and 35th-40th, that was called “Video Couch and Pet Supply”. They only had two couches and they weren’t for sale.
I used to rent VHS tapes from the convenience store down the street for $1. The selection wasn’t the greatest, but at least they had “Heathers”! #thegoodolddays
Video Barber sounds way cool
If you guys are ever in Athens, you should absolutely hit up Vision Video. It’s this awesome local chain run by a bunch of hipsters who will spit on you if you try to check out Transformers.
The Prancer and skin cancer combo has been happening in my hometown for fifteen plus years. It seems only natural the rest of the country would catch on eventually.
“Oh good, they have Ti-TAN-ic.”
/
Rimshot!
http://instantrimshot.com/index.php?sound=rimshot
This must have been where we failed. -Blockbuster
GTLMIB
Risky move there, video stores, considering market research shows that tanning beds will made obsolete in just a few years by the sun.
In other news, R.I.P. video stores (1977-soon)
the best job i’ve ever had and ever will have was at a video store in college. VIDEO TO GO – EAST LANSING, REPRESENT OR WHATEVER! we caught a man in a wheelchair masturbating in the porn room, had late night return contests and listened to movie nerds bla bla about their favorite movies until we kicked them out at midnight. it was the best. video stores, never forget.
Somewhat related: I heard an interview with Snooki on the radio yesterday. She said that she once applied for a job at a tanning salon, and that on the application under “Ethnicity” she checked “Other” and wrote in “Tan.” They didn’t even hire her! I admit, I chuckled.
She talked about that in last week’s episode. She said she marked “tan” for a few jobs and that’s why they didn’t hire her. I thought she meant it was because they were racist, but now I realize it was because she is dumb.
In my hometown, there’s a tanning salon/video rental store called Tanfastic Tans.
Are you from Ithaca, NY, because there is a Tanfastic there too.
Decatur, AL. Maybe they’re sister stores.
Wevs, I’m just going to keep pirating my tans from The Sun. It’s hosted in Sweden or something, totally legit scene.
Will they still let me stare at the cover of Multiplicity while getting my tan?
My man and I were in a McMansion neighborhood the other day and there was a brand new Family Video with ten cars parked in front of it. We were so confused that we literally argued about what it could be and came home and looked it up (it’s a “rentailer” lol). I guess it just shows how out of touch upper middle class suburbanites are…
You guys…I need to come clean about something…I used to work at a tanning salon. We did not rent videos though.
Wow, that feels really nice to finally get that off my chest!
You are dead to me.
I am dead to me too. The shame is just so intense.
Um, also, this place has been in Boy’s Town in Chicago at least as far back as the first time I lived here in liiiike 1995.
CHICAGO: FIRST IN IMPLAUSIBLE SYNERGIES
I love that place, I go there after visiting my lawyer/travel agent/DJ.
You thought I was kidding didn’t you?
Both of the video stores in the town where I grew up have always had tanning salons. I’m not sure how a town of 747 supports two video stores, or two of anything really, but there you go. I was confused the first time I went to Blockbuster and there were no tanning beds.
“Mom-and-pops have two advantages: cost structure and porn”
Having lived for a while in a small town in rural Kentucky (yes, it was hell) where everyone and their mom goes tanning, it seemed like every local business had tanning beds. Video stores, convenience stores, laundromats, etc. all had tanning beds on-site for your skin-crispening enjoyment. Even now, back in civilization, there is a place down the street that has everything you will ever need in life: laundromat/dry cleaning, tanning, daquiri bar, and ice cream parlor ALL IN ONE. Now THAT is a business model.
YES!!! I grew up in rural southern Ohio and video/tanning stores were pretty common. They might still be common, but I don’t pay attention much when I’m visiting my parents. They did recently tell me that their local pizza/bait and tackle shop closed down after 15 years of business. Not joking about that.
I remember when I was 10 years old and my family moved to the tiny mountain town of Boone, North Carolina, our local video store had a back room with tanning beds in it. And this was back in the early 90s. My young mind was so confused at this juxtaposition.
The point of my little story is, I don’t think this is anything new.
Yeah, in the rural Iowa town where I attended college, the majority of the video stores had tanning booths. The nastiest rumors one could spread were about seeing certain students tanning when one went to rent videos.