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Daniel Engber has a powerful essay in the latest issue of Slate Magazine examining the rise and fall of quicksand in American entertainment. Apparently, the youth of today aren’t even scared of it! We’ll see how brave these children are when we throw them all in a pit of TERRIFYING QUICKSAND with NO SNAKE ROPES. We’ll see then.
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Oh my god. At first I was like “TROLOLOLOLOLOLO!” But as the gif progressed I was genuinely horrified.
“Watch my terrifying video of a hapless child being swallowed by the earth and comment.”
Who is the asshole with the camera?
Bin Laden?
Your boyfriend.
HOW DOES IT END?!
But what do kids today do when they want to jump from the table to the counter to the chair? “The Floor is Made of My Pathologized Yet Ineffable Ennui” just doesn’t have the same ring to it.
There’s always Hot Lava
Tru calling.
Lava, obvs!
My bad! Jinxed it!
Used band-aids covered in boogers?
“Oh, Mummy. I tire of megacorporations aiming their advertisements at my primal impulses! Can’t we play in the park?”
Don’t even get me started on the R.o.U.S.’s.
I don’t think they exi
So I still have time to demand a refund on these leggings, then?
Ok, so I clearly misread this as an article about American Apparel for some reason.
And I’m keeping the leggings.
To summarize, kids today think that quicksand is fake and gay.
Quicksand debunked? But I love that song!
http://www.wosound.com/images/AlbumCovers-DavidBowie-HunkyDory(1971).jpg
Was the author trying to simulate the helpless drag of quicksand by writing an article that would literally never end?
Bizarre confession: When I was about 6 or 7, I would lie down on the bathroom floor (door closed) and imagine myself being slowly consumed from the feet up by quicksand (usually; sometimes lava). Often I would put the bathroom rug over me like a blanket and slowly pull it up to simulate this (it was kind of gritty). I would do this with just underwear on. When I was “submerged” about halfway (you know what I mean) I would feel a deranged thrill, and then later as it rose to my face and threatened to enclose me finally, completely, I would approach some kind of ecstasy. I really, really wanted to be sucked entirely into quicksand (and rescued just seconds after disappearing).
I have no idea what this means. Some totes disturbing perversion, no doubt.
I have shared too much.
When I was a kid, I liked having the backseat of our car folded down on me and then having my brothers sit on it. I enjoyed the pressure in a small space. Could these be related? I don’t know, but it’s interesting to consider.
#childhoodfetishgum
When I was 6 or 7 I would lie underneath my bean bag chair and pretend Jabba the Hutt was forcing me to pleasure him.
Huh. I just went back and finished reading the article (it was 100 years long, and the first time it mentioned Vietnam, I stopped reading/killed myself with a hammer). So — it turns out there’s a quicksand fetish?? I did not read that part before I posted. Oy.
Well, just knowing that groups exist for adults who are like I was when I was 6 is… weird.
I wonder if there are also car backseat/Jabba beanbag groups.
[IMG]http://i11.photobucket.com/albums/a163/tobeyoungis1234/zizek-1.jpg[/IMG]
ugh.
Just leave out the IMG tags; Videogum magically paints the picture for you.
Kids today probably heard the Stuff You Should Know podcast about quicksand, which stated that you can’t really die from the stuff. So, really, none of us should be scared of it.
“A quicksand rug? And he thinks I’m old-fashioned,” Nic Cage (summer blockbuster “Sorcerer’s Apprentice”).
So the popularity of quicksand is sinking, you say?
At first, from your description, I was like, “Oh, interesting, come to think of it quicksand hasn’t really been around much in movies and TV anymore.” And then I started reading the article and it took a complete left turn into the quicksand fetish world and I was like, “This is really not what I came here to read about at all.”
Did anyone else click on the “Girl sinks in Quicksand” link in the very helpful and unobtrusive BING bar? It’s kind of grim for two reasons… Because it appears to simply be a video of a girl sinking in quicksand, and because I know (suspect?) it was created for someone to jerk off to that idea…
This article brought up all sorts of sad memories of fictional characters that I loved disappearing into quicksand.
You know what they say, you can lead a horse to the swamps of sadness, but you can’t make it fight the Nothing.