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On last night’s episode of Jersey Shore, Ronnie and Sammi fought about their all-important relationship. The other girls finally decided that they couldn’t take it anymore (JOIN THE CLUB), but then took it some more for awhile. Sammi, too, decided she couldn’t take it anymore, and left Ronnie alone in a nightclub, only to go back looking for him two minutes later, but he drove off in a cab (he also called her a bitch) and she was done with him, until the next morning when they hugged. By the end of the episode, everyone agreed that Sammi was getting played for the fool. Some of them went to an Internet Cafe (AN INTERNET CAFE) and wrote an “anonymous” email to Sammi about what was going on. Really? They actually took the time to set up a fake account with a fake name that didn’t sound like a fake name they would drunkenly make up at an Internet Cafe surrounded by a camera crew and a gaggle of chattering producers? Of course, all of that is beside the point, considering the fact that the Sammi and Ronnie dramatic narrative isn’t nearly compelling enough to warrant any interest in the sub-narratives that offshoot it. MTV has really put all of its dramatic investment eggs in the Sammi and Ronnie basket, a basket that they moved out of the setting in which that basket even made sense, and that was a mistake, and that is why we must say goodbye. What else is there to hang onto? Brief, dull, interstitial glimpses into life at a gelato shop? Snooki’s turbulent telephone-based relationship with Emilio which we already know ended months ago? No. We are all adults here, and as adults, we must eventually cut our losses. At least for now.
Of course, as with everything else, we are alone in this.
The ratings for this season are way bigger than those for last season, and they’re increasing from one week to the next. Still not sure how last night’s episode did, I guess, but the first three were monsters. From Deadline:
Episode 3 of MTV reality juggernaut Jersey Shore’s second season last night set new all-time highs for the show: 5.5 million viewers and a 5.3 rating among persons 12-34. They surpassed the previous series high marks posted by the second season premiere 2 weeks ago, which drew 5.3 million viewers and a 5.1 rating in 12-34. This new record probably won’t last long either.
Huh? Why? I mean, I CAN understand people who watched the first season being mildly interested for whatever misguided reason in the sloppy, forced misbehavior of this gang of self-satisfied “stars.” But to come in cold, completely unaware of what this show used to be: where is the appeal? What do these people see that we don’t? Is their tolerance for boredom and half-lidded gazing at the nightly club-hopping of 24 year olds really that much higher? Apparently.
There is a chance Jersey Shore could win us back (and when I say us, I obviously mean me, but I am lumping you in here, because who wants to be alone?). Season 3 is filming as we speak, IN ACTUAL NEW JERSEY, and they’ve replaced the insufferable Angelina (who doesn’t even make a good reality TV villain, such is her worthlessness) with new blood, and so there is hope. Two of the cast members have been arrested in the past week. FINALLY. This Miami Beach adventure feels like a hastily put together, ill-conceived misadventure. We all make mistakes in this life, the difference is just that we don’t make everyone else watch our mistakes for 12 weeks, or whatever.
So, goodbye, for now, Jersey Shore. Just because your producers and cast don’t seem to have any idea what makes for interesting television or intelligent life decisions doesn’t mean we are equally incapable. We are plenty capable. Just watch and see how capable we are!
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And it seems to me/ you lived your life/ like a hot tub full of ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
an oldie, but a goodie.
actually, an oldie, but an ewwie.
Good luck, America.
“Welcome Back!” — New Jersey
I live in New Jersey near Seaside where they film this dreadful show, and I can say that except for sad misguided youths who think that trashiness should be embraced, no one wants them back.
Please don’t compare episodes of Jersey Shore to us. Not cool.
I think they need an annoying kid or a special guest star at this point, kid from the blind side and um Shaq since he lives in Miami
How about short round from the temple of doom?
That kid is annoying…but on a show like this there is no one smart enough for him to call “Doctah” for 2.5 hours.
send them to Universal Studios!
Or a flashback episode!
Ted McGinley!
Confession: watched my first-ever episode last night with my roommates. That hour was so long, I kept waiting for Leo DiCaprio to show up and shoot me out of limbo.
In fairness though, it’s hard to top The Situation’s comment about beating a dead horse: “And then it’s dead, so you gotta stop beating it, because it’s dead.”
The note… don’t get me started. Holy shirtless gelato, Batman. What a shitshow that was. And who knew there were still Internet cafes? I want me some of that black with lime-green highlighted goodness.
And could it be that everyone is watching it because they heard everyone else is watching it? The wisdom of crowds indeed.
Just to be clear, we’re going to move on to something completely different now, right?
HAHA! This show is horrible-greatness.
Is this a video game? Those ladies are definitely residents of the uncanny valley, right?
Reminds me of Snickles or whatever the fuck
Yeah, I posted this a thread ago, but it fit, so, sue me
I appreciate the new Bing results bar! I WAS looking for video related to Goodbye OR Jersey Shore. VERY helpful stuff, Bing. Great job.
Bing: Helping internet users since never.
honestly that thing has got to go
It looks like things might pick up next week when Didi and Gogo stop by with thier friends Lucky and Pozzo.
I don’t think they set up a fake email account, right? They just printed the all-caps letter and were going to hide it somewhere.
Also: yiiikes, I know that.
Also what obryan said. You beat me again, faceless commentariat!!
Just because my face is covered in blood doesn’t mean I don’t have one.
Just because I am undead doesn’t mean I don’t have feelings.
It feels weird to be the guy defending Jersey Shore, but they definitely did not set up a fake account and send an anonymous email. They just typed a poorly worded letter (“written only by the light of day” – Gob Bluth), printed it out, and like stuck it in her dresser. A terrible idea, yes, but less labor intensive.
I won’t stop watching until at least three more cast members get punched in the face. I already signed a deal with the devil (Cablevision).
What if they drop something while they are cooking again! HOW WILL WE KNOW!
Let’s talk about Project Runway instead! Michael C. won with that ridiculous handkerchief dress? Yes it was a good color, but the design was so boring, like salsa lessons + bridesmaid.
I heard they replaced Angelina with the duck phone.
Did anyone else’s DVR stop recording before the end of the episode?
If not, Did Sammi see the letter, Did they discuss it, or is it a Cliffhanger???
haha, i like how those are the ONLY 3 OPTIONS for what might have happened.
There is a great subplot this season about the group’s inability to boil water without some epic disaster occurring.
“GTL… more like GTFO!” – Jay Leno’s LiveJournal
Why do they never turn the lights off before going to sleep?! It really bugs me!
Does anyone have a .gif of when Snooki found out Emilio cheated on her, and JWOWW looked at the camera like “fuck now I have to deal with this shit?” Because that self-awareness was disturbing to say the least.
How did I forget that! Oh man. The priceless “aw shit” look.
i would hazard that, in all honesty, the self-awareness is ever present in this season. put yourself in their shoes:
1. Theyve seen the first season. They have also seen the reactions to said season. They understand the “Phenomenon”.
2. As much as we bitch about being adults, and doing adult things, and responsibility, and 2012, we must always remember that these people are actually adults as well. Jwoww is 24. Mike and Paul are 28. THAT IS OLD, THEY ARE PRACTICALLY GRANDPAS.
3. Vinchenzo is the only person who was brought up well (sources: when I was 16, the after show thingys), so these are people still trying to figure out how to be people. that is hard, and not easy? Right?
4. you have to imagine that cameras and attention heaped on people who, in a just and perfect world, would be working doubles at Macy’s to support their 3 illegitimate kids, is pretty hard to deal with. I could easily see Mike ripping his shirt off and screaming “ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED, BRAH???” at Gabe when he bitches.
But for God’s sake, we can never give up the illusion that they just dont get how “crazy” they are.
Dammit, Fischer, we pay you to have a flawed concept of love!
I’ll see myself out.
Sammi is the worst reality show character to have ever existed in this genre of compromised dignity, alcoholism and borderline retardation.
Can we kick her off the island?
I miss ACTUAL NEW JERSEY. I am from there. Society has a long way to go.
Wow, isn’t Snookie 19 or 20 years old? The picture you used might start showing up in science classes as examples of how tanning beds and hot dog consumption = instant old lady face. In economics classes the combination could showcase how they cancel each other out and only one need be chosen for the end result.
I kept putting off watching this episode of Jersey Shore because I was already so bored out of my mind last week, but finally forced myself to watch it yesterday and feel like I have reached a new low in my life. Pull the plug!