Photos
Between the young man getting hit by a truck and the young man learning there was a maggot eating his eyeball, it has been a pretty rough week out there for young men. Of course, some of us are not young men. Impossible to tell who. Could be any of us. The important thing is that it is the weekend, affording all of us some time, young and old, to recover from the illnesses and near-fatal mishaps of the week. Go lay down! I know people hate to hear this, but we’re friends, and we always tell each other the truth, even when it is hard: you look tired.
After the jump, the five Highest Rated Comments, as voted on by you, the Lowest Rated Comment, the winner of this week’s Shark Week Caption Contest, and the Editor’s Choice.
This Week’s Highest Rated Comments
| #5 |  |
mike_d | Aug 3rd | Score:89 |
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“Luke, I am literally your father.” |
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| Posted in: Best New Party Game 28: #RachelZoeMovieQuotes | |||
| #4 |  |
Jambi | Aug 3rd | Score:89 |
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Candygram. |
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| Posted in: The Videogum Why Don’t YOU Caption It? Contest: Shark Week! | |||
| #3 |  |
itsahotdog! | Aug 3rd | Score:95 |
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“If you build it, he will literally come.” (sorry) |
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| Posted in: Best New Party Game 28: #RachelZoeMovieQuotes | |||
| #2 |  |
briadru4 | Aug 3rd | Score:103 |
| Posted in: The Videogum Why Don’t YOU Caption It? Contest: Shark Week! | |||
| #1 |  |
whoa! | Jul 30th | Score:104 |
| Posted in: Monsters’ Ball: The Week’s Best Comments | |||
[Ed. note: Good work everyone. Last night, Videogum officially passed 199,000 published comments. That is so many comments! Personally, I had kind of hoped that everyone would rally together and post a lot of comments today so that we could get from 199,000 (over two+ years) to 1,000,000 in just 24 hours, but it looks like that's probably not going to happen. Nevertheless: a milestone! Bartender, a round of pats on the back for my friends here.]
This Week’s Lowest Rated Comments
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unionman | Aug 5th | Score:-27 |
| those racist motherfuckers don’t know shit about heritage unless you consider being racist retards heritage | ||
| Posted in: Party In The UGA | ||
[Ed. note: This comment makes some pretty sweeping generalizations. Especially considering that the focus of the discussion was a misguided but ultimately well-intentioned student orientation video at a public university. But then unionman seemed to kind of explain himself, and I guess it was reverse psychology? I don't know. In the end, I am much more confused than offended.]
This Week’s Caption Contest Winner
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Notsewfast | Aug 3rd | Score:114 |
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Ann Coulter was embarrassed as paparazzi caught a glimpse up her skirt at the debut of her new book “If I were wrong I’d be brown”. |
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| Posted in: The Videogum Why Don’t YOU Caption It? Contest: Shark Week! | ||
[Ed. note: Congratulations, Notsewfast. You earned it!]
This Week’s Editor’s Choice
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ElectricKoala | Aug 5th | Score:5 | |
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The real war-crime here is that haircut |
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| Posted in: Normal Thing That Happens: Naomi Campbell Talking To The War Crimes Tribunal About A Secret Night Pouch Of Dirty Stones | |||
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I’m offended.
Sorry my album cover didn’t quite make it. We’ll get em next week, friend!
It’s Snark week, SW, and you were top Dog*!
*(wolfe)
can we just have hipsterdad back now forever please?
hope everyone had a lovely shark week
Is there such a thing as a non-lovely shark week? I think not. I think that is commie talk.
I’m not a commie, see I’m pink not red
PINKO
oops, forgot to cite my sources
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pinko
Too close for my taste. I trust alternate universe you more…
http://t3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:BAXzkbrezpWC3M:http://i58.photobucket.com/albums/g255/af1081/Blue-Zoidberg-3.jpg&t=1
Well shit.
so. cute.
Just an FYI, Chicago Monstahs will be mashing Saturday Night to commemorate the monsters visiting for Lolla, and also those driving in because they want to hang out and mash, Chicago Style.
http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=147927091888802
To anyone coming thru, just look for a kid sticking his remote up his butt, or a midget with his cat, or this guy –
BRING YO FRIENDS
Sorry, I can’t not do this:
OMG THOSE ARE THE CUTEST DOGS!!!!!!!! <3<3<3<3<3
OH MY FUCKING GOD
I was trying to think of some ‘cute-motorcycle-side-car’ or ‘double-barrelled cuteness’ remark, but the cute has rendered my brain fuzzy.
hehe he’s packin puppies.
There will be a small number of VG monsters meeting ther at 9pm in case you guys can’t make it at 10:30.
Facetaco demands a recount!
Damn those hanging chads, I was robbed!
Gabe should be fired. We’re the man now, dogs.
My opinion, in case anyone cares [Steve Winwood, I can see you typing a "cool story bro" response RIGHT NOW and I am telling you I am actually going to decapitate you] is that Rihanna was abused, but she is also a pop star, and her goal is to sell as much music and affiliated products as she can, and that raunch and sex and leather are all good ways to sell that.
["HA ha! You barf spelled barf barf wrong. Idiot. Barf's pretty." - Animatronic McBoringface, Dawn Of Civilization - 2012]
I think that was very nicely put, NapComp.
“Derp, derp.” – Steve Winderp, I’m sure
she’s not kidding steve. so don’t be a dick.
If you really want to get Steve, threaten Merle. Go for the hurt, not the kill. #thingsbuffytaughtme
hausfrau, you’re right. i bought this record yesterday and had a photo all ready to go where i’m starting off with billy bob and implicitly, steve/rolfe would be last. i was gonna use it when steve posted his inevitable “i don’t give a care” speech at the start of the monsters’ ball. and then ol’ winwood threw me for a loop so i improvised. that’s napoleon complex’s hand literally, err, well, actually decapitating him. have i taken this too far?
too far in that you actually bought a Rock-afire Explosion Record because of an avatar an asshole uses on the internet? Or…too far in that you are joke-threatening violence against said asshole and possibly devaluing your record?
BECAUSE, while joke-threatening videogummers might push things a little far (it is nice to play nice), Steve can (hah!) be a dick. and, as far as the record, what you do with your money is your business.
Also: A Showbiz Pizza Rock-afire Explosion Record? What??
well, if i bought the record, and/or the swiss army knife for that matter, to taunt a stranger on the internet then yes, i think that would show some form of going way too far. however, all of this is just a fringe benefit(?) of having bought the record for other reasons. those reasons being:
1. my wife has many fond childhood memories of showbiz pizza and is a bit obsessed with it (my wife is not steve winwood so far as i know)
2. i learned, via the eBay completed auctions site, that some lunatic paid $50 (FIFTY!) for a copy of this same record in mediocre condition just last week, and my copy is sealed with the original showbiz pizza place pricetag ($5.49) and hype sticker (“featuring unchained melody”). so, if needed i should be able to get about twice that and i supplement my income with online record sales.
3. i was in a record store and i saw a sealed copy of the rock-afire explosion record, an animatronic pizza parlor band. how do you NOT buy it?
#recordnerdgum
Oh my god, I cannot stop laughing at the last part. Well played, madam.
“I am telling you I am actually going to decapitate you.”
Is it okay if I use this, like, anytime anybody disagrees with me about anything? So many LOLs. I can see it now:
Friend: You know, I’m not actually a fan of that new brunch place that opened on 22nd.
Me: I am telling you I am actually going to decapitate you.
Coworker: I thought the ending of Inception was juvenile and insulting.
Me: I am telling you I am actually going to decapitate you.
Jehovah’s Witnesses: Do you want to know what the Bible really says about our path to salvation?
Me: I am telling you I am actually going to decapitate you.
Fiance: Not tonight, sweetie. I’m pretty wiped out.
Me: I am telling you I am actually going to decapitate you.
Well, maybe not that last one.
Look, Napoleon Complicated, I get it: you’re angry and you don’t like me. But apparently I have to remind you that I’m the first commentator in these environs to get a special EGOT award, despite of the hostile environment I work in with all of you and your hatred. You better start showing some respect when ever the Winwood’s brought up. Or else. That goes for all of you. Word.
I thought you didn’t give a care about our little popularity contests, friend.
PSYCHE I was just kiddin about that noise
So many grammatical errors my head is spinning.
I upvoted you after the bracketed sentence. You had me at bracket.
This comment is so much farther down than expected. So boo me and yay Napolean Complex.
This might sound glib and a little inappropriate, and I understand entirely if you’d rather I not, but your comment is pretty and I felt I should let you know. Just, if you weren’t aware.
I just have to say Notsewfast, that is the best caption on any photo ever created.
“Walt, come with us back to the Island.”
“Why, what’s there?”
“Shark week dude, Discovery Channel is set up near the Temple and there’s some killer babes and brew out there!”
Let’s all go to the beach this weekend!
Beach Tip: If you look happy you are SUPER lame.
I’m already there.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bW-4lbnyCIc
That is great, thanks for that. Is that their early stuff, I’ve never heard it before? Very Cocteau Twins.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FGYNvx9lqDQ
I’m sure they are jamming the new Wavvves record.
If you know your Wavves, teacherman posted a more accurate sampling of his fans. Notsewfast’s beach bums are likely sulking because the Optimo parties are over.
I stand corrected Jeb, yous the king of the beach
Full disclosure: I upvoted my own image.
I know I should regret this but that summer with Jeremiah at Graffiti Lagoon was one of the best of my life.
on the left: Justin Bieber circa 2014
(yes, I know there will be no 2014 – there’s also no such thing as a time-traveling camera)
My wife and I really are going to be hanging out at the beach all day and early evening Sunday. LA/Orange County monsters, if you want to drop by and say Hi, please do! We’re gonna be at the lower end of Huntington Beach. Check this facebook event on Sunday and we’ll list specifically where we’re gonna be.
http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=133207046719534
I’ll be the big, tall, blond, balding dude who answers to “Luke.” Or Werttrew.,
…but it looks like Sunday is going to be cold and drizzly. No beach day for Werttrew after all. :-/
It probably won’t be drizzly, it will just look drizzly, if I know CA.
I’m in Hollywood, about 90 minutes north of Huntington. If you decide to take a look around Hollywood, let me know.
Hepatitis (Hipster-titis?) wears cowboy boots.
This was meant to be a reply to notsewfast, rather than an isolated statement about viral footwear.
It’s almost impossible to tell gay prostitutes and just really cool teenz apart anymore. : (
Ok, so this isn’t Monster’s Ball related, so first off: congratulations to everyone in the Ball!
What I would really like to talk about here is the movie club. I realize that it is a Gabeocracy, and not a democracy, but I believe I still have the right to gather twenty-four friends and some guns and discuss the choice of Step Up 3D. I would like to point out that The Other Guys comes out this week, and looks pretty good. Also, we missed Dinner for Shmucks, which stars quite a few of our boyfriends, and The Kids are Alright seems to be in wide release now, with all of its upper-middle class white problems which we all relate so well to.
It’s just, in this economy, it really just doesn’t make sense for me to pay 15 dollars to see people dance at me, even if they did once star in a series of web videos with Miley Cyrus.
Fuck it, let’s just do Toy Story 3 again.
Have you seen the trailer for Step Up? Have you not eyes? I think a Step Up hatewatch will be a lot of fun and beside The Other Guys isn’t out in Yoorp. Inclusion!
Well, it’s your own fault for living in a made-up place.
A small number of us monsters (including the presently absent-doing-outside-life-activities southernbitch) have a boyfriend featuring the the dancing-at-you movie and his name is Mike the Asian Guy in Glee. Maybe he will even have lines, as well as awesome dance moves!
Maybe he’ll take off his shirt!!!!
I hear what you’re saying man, bobsled.
But I see Gabe’s choice as kind of endearing — it’s nice to see that the senior citizens are interested in what the kids are up to these days.
Woo-hoo! First showing in Monster’s Ball! Thanks for the up-votes monsters – hope I made you giggle.
It has always been my dream to be swallowed whole by a great white shark, so that I could bust out of him from the inside and spend the next few weeks wearing the shark like a suit of armor. Basically this pug dog stole my idea, and my shark suit and I are coming for him.
Does this make more, or less sense, when it doesn’t show up as a reply to the pug dog dressed like a shark?
Happy Friday, guys! I just got paid!
*gasp*
woah!’s comment made the #1 spot, and it was a comment dedicated to me for my MS Paint skills and copious amount of wasted time at work. That’s almost as good as making it into the Monster’s Ball, right? Right!?!?
whenever someone gets into the monster’s ball for replying on a comment I made I count a little bit of it for myself sshhh don’t tell
Just a quick reminder that the 1st annual NE Monster Meet up is next Saturday!!!
It’s gonna be at Anthony’s T Pizzeria Restaurant (1016 Commonwealth Avenue Boston, MA) at 8:30!!!!
I hope some of you guys can make it!
Actually, it was a pretty great week, guys/America — Naomi Campbell/Naomi Campbell’s “hair” notwithstanding.
Hey guys, check out the new commenting robes! It’s part of my Autumn/Winter collection (it is my Autumn/Winter collection). It’s a monkey rescuing a puppy from a burning building. That’s great but a dozen people did die as a result of said fire, so perhaps it’s not such a nice choice and maybe, just maybe, I’m not entirely comfortable with it.
But it’s Friday and Friday means never having to say you’re sorry. So…
SHAKE SHAKE SHAKE
SHAKE SHAKE SHAKE
SHAKE THAT BOOTAY!
Hey, um, I feel kind of dumb asking but… Whats the “Candygram” thing all about? I assumed it was some response to something someone else wrote on the thread, but its not, and everyone else seemed to have totally got it. Anyone?
P.S. I will show my gratitude to whomever answers in laffs! Do not hesitate on this great deal!
Don’t feel dumb! It’s an old SNL sketch from the 70s – goofing on the Jaws craze.
This was the only video I could find of it:
http://www.spike.com/video/land-shark/2802070
As promised, laffs:
Ben you are a Monster of your word.
Glad I’m not the only one who was completely baffled by that comment and the resulting upvotes. I thought it was another Videogum in-joke but it wasn’t on the list so I was completely lost.
thanks guys!
-literally the king of photoshop
I literally did not expect this. Thank you, Monsters.
WOOOOOHOOOO, thanks Gabe, I’m gonna celebrate 2night!
I feel like i should help with the 1,000 comments goal. Did I help? Did I? LOOK AT ME HELPING!!! #helper.
No, one MILLION comments.
199,000 comments isn’t cool. You know what’s cool? 1,000,000 comments. Well, actually, now that I really think about it, 199,000 comments is pretty cool too.
oh….that’s more of commitment then i’m prepared to make. #gohelpyourself.
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see.
Silly Andy. Jokes about conservatives need not be inventive!
Progress would be more vagina dentata jokes.
You guys! A gnat was flying near my face last night and I TOTALLY FREAKED OUT!
I’m forever changed. Thanks Videogum.
just testing
http://de.tinypic.com/r/73ji8i/7
http://yfrog.com/e4balloonvideogumj