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Everything about this news story in which the actor who played Eddie Munster, Butch Patrick, has started dating a lifelong superfan is pretty great, so I’ve taken the liberty of reposting the entire thing here. From the AP:
WEST CHESTER, Pa. – Forty-five years after a Pennsylvania woman sent a fan letter to her favorite TV star, they’ve made a Munster match. [Ed. note: ATTENTION PULTIZERS! WE ARE GOING TO NEED A BIGGER PUTLIZERS!]
Donna McCall was a 10-year-old with a crush on Butch Patrick, who played boy werewolf Eddie Munster in the mid-`60s sitcom “The Munsters.”
In her letter, she asked Patrick how tall he was because girls at the time were making gum wrapper chains long enough to match the height of their boyfriends. To her delight, the young actor responded and included his height — 5 feet, 4 inches. [Ed. note: Swoon!]
Like many childhood projects, however, the wrapper chain wasn’t completed. [Ed. note: Haha. BURN! How tall are you? I want to make you a don't-care chain that is exactly how much I don't care.] Decades passed.
McCall was a Philadelphia Eagles cheerleader in the late 1970s, worked for 20 years as a hospital pharmacist, married and divorced. When “The Munsters” ended in 1966 after two years on the air, Patrick left Mockingbird Lane and appeared on shows including “My Three Sons” and “Lidsville,” though Eddie Munster remains his best known role.
An online article about a man who holds the world record for making a 12-mile-long gum wrapper chain triggered McCall’s memory of her preteen idol. She found an e-mail address for Patrick, and a correspondence began. [Ed. note: It definitely feels like some details are missing here. But whatever, this has been a pretty good story so far, and we're about to get to the part where they fall in love!]
Hold on, it gets better:
McCall, now 55 and living 30 miles outside Philadelphia in West Chester, sent along a picture from her cheerleading days [Ed. note: I bet she did!] , said Patrick, 57, who never married but has a 23-year-old son in Missouri. She also sent photos of herself doing activities on her “bucket list,” [Ed. note: SENT PHOTOS FROM HER BUCKET LIST!!!] from scuba diving and trapeze lessons to race car driving, he said.
“That intrigued me a lot,” Patrick said. “She’s single, she’s beautiful, she’s in the nicest part of the country [Ed. note: ??] and she likes to do adventurous things. I figured I had to meet this woman.”
The pair agreed to meet May 8 at a horror convention [Ed. note: haha!] outside Pittsburgh called DraculaCon [Ed. note: HAHA!]. You could say it was love at first bite. [Ed. note: Boo.]
“I think a lot of people… thought there was something special going on between us,” McCall said. “It was just very comfortable, very easy.”
Within weeks, Patrick, who has homes in Los Angeles and Florida, moved to Pennsylvania to be with McCall.
He’s working this Halloween season with a company called 13 Haunts as its “spokesperson and in-house celebrity Munster” for appearances at its 13 haunted houses in the Philadelphia area.
The couple say they are not engaged, contrary to other reports. [Ed. note: Finally, the truth! So many false reports out there about this!]
“We’ve only known each other for three months, four months, so it would be a little crazy to be jumping into that,” McCall said. [Ed. note: He said, from his house in Pennsylvania, where he lives now, all of a sudden, with this lady.]
Patrick added: “It’s not that it’s not going to happen, but one day at a time, so to speak.”
Meanwhile, they say they’re enjoying getting to know each other — both are active in fundraising at the Chester County Arts Association, and Patrick is enlisting Hollywood friends including Shirley Jones and Lindsay Wagner to lend their celebrity signatures to an upcoming exhibit of embellished bras called “BRAvo Arts Alive” to benefit breast cancer organizations.
After the busy Halloween season for Patrick, he and McCall plan to head to Los Angeles so she can meet his family.
“We’ll get through the holidays,” he said. “Then next year’s a new year. Who knows?” [Ed. note: Wait, what? Who knows WHAT? You will make it through the holidays and then who knows? IS THIS TRUE LOVE OR NOT WHAT IS EVEN GOING ON HERE?]
We should all be so lucky as to have a former cheerleader who liked watching us on a hugely successful television program when were were both children email us 100 years later and still want to be in love with us in real life for real and agrees to meet us at DracuCon and lives in the “best place in the country”! Good luck to Butch Patrick and Donna McCall! We are all waiting to see what is going to happen after the holidays. Also: to all the people out there spreading false reports about when and if Butch Patrick and Donna McCall are going to get married: quit it! No more false reports about this, please. Just lots and lots of true reports. One a day, at least.
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This was the BEST.
The Adams Family was plagiarism
Now I just need to be a cheerleader for my childhood dream to come true!!
Well, that was not supposed to be a reply. That’s what I get for thinking I understand this whole interwebs thing!!!!
http://sadtrombone.com/
There is never a situation that cannot be improved by sadtrombone.com.
Mine too Lilbobbytables. Look out Parker Louis! You can’t lose (my heart.)
Let’s synchronize our swatches for love o’clock (what?)
I forgot all about Parker Lewis, his awful shirts, and my undying (vampires) love for him. Thank you!
Oh boy, we share the same childhood crush! I suggest a cheer-leading battle (cheer-off?) to determine who gets to hover email him in 20 years.
The Addams Family came first, son.
Nope!
I wonder what the news story will look like when Gabe agrees to marry his fan Godsauce. Headline will probably be something like “Gay Marriage Weaksauce!”
Just kiddin’!
Sources are predicting not in California, buddy.
You mean “False Report”?
Gabe isn’t gay.
Wait. Neither am I.
It all works out!
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I…I can’t. Just flames. Flames on the side of my face.
He moved in under his own accord? I dunno, guys. This sounds a little like Misery.
MUNSTERY?
Found a pic of the happy couple!
I’m glad this worked out better then when I wrote Danielle Fischel a letter asking how tall she was
This is awesome. Do you think if I collected enough wax replicas of diseased eyeballs and Edwardian esoterica and dress as a sexy clown that Crispin Glover might finally return my endless barrage of phone calls?
Just go to one of his showings of the movies he produced and mack on him when he signs autographs after. I met him that way and he was super nice and I accidently distracted him by babbling while we were shaking hands so he didn’t let go right away and it was totally like we were holding hands there for a second. If you can get into a conversation about Werner Herzog and Werner Ranier Fassbinder you’re almost there. Go forth and succeed where I failed!
Brb, writing facebook messages to everyone I ever taped a poster of to my wall. It’s going to take me a while to get through this list.
Also, now feeling SO glad that Gabe linked us to the celebrity heights website in another post. http://www.celebheights.com/
Which reminds me, dibbs on Topher Grace!
This gives me hope that one day Jessica Alba will marry me
If I ever get a chance to talk to her, I’ll speak highly of you, friend.
I just texted her, but she asked for Godsauces’s phone number instead. Sorry.
1-900-WEAK-SAUCE
Jon Hamm here are some activities from my bucket list:
hunching over my desk while being on the internet ALL DAY AND NIGHT
Obsessing over varying degrees of quality television shows
Light hoarding
Yes, I will marry you.
If you are also an esteemed analrapist, I will marry you.
I can’t upvote this because I want Mans’ pro-Godsauce post above to win. Sorry. It’s really funny though.
Finally, proof that one day I really could marry Jonathan Taylor Thomas. JTT 4eva!
Oh Yeah? Well my mom slept with Eric Estrada!
…and now he never calls.
…but mom says I’d really like him.
…and I always get really great birthday presents from him.
…I’m not sure why he’s so nice to me when we’ve never even met.
Are you sure it wasn’t David Soul?
motorcycles are dangerous
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Hey guys, don’t blame me. Blame Francis Poncharello.
LOL
I think we can all agree that the best place in the country is actually Tennessee, or at least will be once Basil Marcauex dot com is elected.
Only 25 more years to go until Vicki from “Small Wonder” and I are together forever.
What? She’s not really a robot?
Sigh.
Nor is she eternally 8 year old, you perv.
But I am!
(Weeps into hands at the unbearable psychic weight of never growing older. Eats two Rolos and then cries some more.)
Another headline from the True Stories file: At work, I share a tiny, horrible cube with a semi-angry, often genuinely incoherent woman who used to write sitcoms. “What do you think the worst sitcom ever, in history, is?” I asked. A light came into her eyes: “There’s no doubt in my mind,” she said. “Not for me either,” I said. “Let’s both say our answers at the same time,” she said. And then we counted to 3, and we both said: “Small Wonder!” Then we high-fived.
Then she told me she used to write for it.
Your life is an amazing thing. WOW
(you know about this, right?)
http://fourfour.typepad.com/fourfour/2010/02/small-wonder-so-bad-its-trifling.html
This is literally exactly how I met my girlfriend, Alex Mack.
I wish I could literally meet my girlfriend.
I WISH I could literally meet my girlfriend.
WHAT??!?!?!
Brad Renfro is dead, you guys. Now I’ll never get to marry him in 30 years. Life is so unfair.
You never know what science will come up with next.
He was a cutie that I posted on my walls too. But Devon Sawa is alive, maybe you could marry him instead?
Getting an “in-house celebrity Munster” was a shrewd move on the part of 13 Haunts. Huge entry barriers to any potential competitors now. You can’t simply out-source your celebrity Munster needs and hope to compete, you have to have one IN HOUSE. Salaried, benefits, paid vacations, the whole thing. I don’t care if you have 26 Haunts, a) it’s not a scary number, and b) you simply don’t have a Munster on staff.
This same thing happened to me and Britney Spears’ sister with Zoey 101.
My friend’s mom used to fuck Wee Man from Jackass. That’s kinda like sleeping with Eric Estrada.
He punched me in the face one time at Warped Tour while taking a picture with me. I mean, I deserved it, I went to Warped Tour.
Erik Estrada or Wee Man?
both.
Oh, Wee Man.
Boys becoming wolves – wolves becoming men that marry their fans after such a long time!
Best Comment.
I don’t understand why this didn’t work when I tried it on Joseph Gordon-Levitt. Maybe he’s just too busy picking out my engagement ring to answer my emails. Right, guys? Right??
maybe he’s in your mind right now
And suit shopping with me. He’s terribly excited about it though. Nervous about what suit to wear to the wedding.
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Really? The only reason?
Steve, I think by metero dandy you meant, true, classy gentleman. Shlubs buy suits off the rack. (Which reminds me, I need to stop buying my suits off the rack.)
JGL is absolutely adorbs AND he can dance.
JGL: a gagillion Steve Winwood: 0
That is such a great word, “adorbs.” JGL is definitely adorbs.
Also, he is hot in ways that ordinary people just can’t understand.
I’ve been accused of a lot of things but never ordinary. Unless you were referring to me as the hot one that the ordinary people don’t understand in which case I will consider giving your comment an upvote.
I’m not gonna lie, he’s kind of required to wear that suit to our wedding.
He also has pretty sweet dance moves, steve winwood. Do you have sweet dance moves?
we need an SNL backflip gif too!
rad gif
I know, Steve. Your mom put a lot of time and effort into it.
This gif is strangely soothing.
oh gosh oh gosh oh gosh. so much love.
Joseph Gordon-Levitt can metero my dandy any time.
he can metero all over my face! (I don’t know what that means and still, yes.)
Maybe one day I will get to talk Math theory with Winnie Cooper! (I was going to go with Blossom, but …you know)
I don’t know why my mind just read that as “Whoopi Goldberg” but now I have a new thought to ponder.
aww… how super-creepy-sweet!
If only I wasn’t married I’d track down Viveca Serlachius.
chris hansen jpeg
“Who is Nicholas Sparks and why does he keep showing up on my caller ID?” -Butch Patrick
Team Eddie!
Anyone have the phone #’s for my childhood crushes?
or
Uh, listen, there’s something I need to talk to you about. Re: Doogie. :-/
Dear Anne Shirley,
You may not remember me, but back before WWI, I sent you a letter in which I transcribed my most bosom feelings with regard to your supreme and angelic nature. I also included drafts of two of my most recent poems, one in a light comic style and the second something more Romantic, as though I had ingested the blasted heath itself and poured it forth upon the page with my own dreamy ichor.
Anyway, I was just wondering what was up and if you were still alive. Here are some pictures of my in a cheerleading outfit. I don’t remember when they were taken, but I found them on someone’s Facebook page. Those years I spent studying law while staying with a dowager aunt are such a blur!
I would also like you to know that I have crossed these things off of my bucket list: 1) take a vacation to Iowa; 2) sleep outside (not all night, just for a few minutes); 3) eat one of everything off of a Denny’s menu; and 4) ride a cow with no pants for a professional reason.
Feel free to hit me up anytime. I don’t have a cell phone or email, but I usually am around the post office on Tuesdays after 3.
Regards,
Mans
Dear Mans,
tl;dr
Regards,
Anne Shirley
I read that whole thing thinking it was addressed to “Aunt Shirley”. Majorskincrawling.
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Guess what? Fuck you!
Loved AoGG when I was a little girl. I’m now a 28 yo guy. Go figure.
I can’t believe he was single. How hard could it be?
“I PLAYED EDDIE MUNSTER. WHO WANTS SOME OF THAT?”
Do these guys count? I was in LOVE with the quiet one, Chad.
Is that the Sham Wow guy in Red?
NOOOOOO that’s Chad! a.k.a my boo.
Chad was the best!!!! I remember thinking he had the best singing voice/was the only one who could sing.
Remember when the one in the middle, Evan hosted the show While You Were Out?
*where did that information just COME FROM
No but I do remember that the ugly one was in like EVERY teen movie ever in the 2000′s.
“That’s Mickey Parke, Fool!”
Which ugly one? The two on the far left do nothing for the teen in me.
I LOVE this movie!!!! Chad was my favorite too. “I tried to make as many laser noises as humanly possible. Ber Ber Ber Ber…”
“Say goodbye to those Levi’s, Say Hello to my sweet thighs.”
-Say It, Don’t Spray It, 2ge+her.
When the one on the far right died in real life, a girl* at my junior high held a vigil for him after school in one of the science rooms. No one came.
*No, it wasn’t me
I did, however, rock out to that soundtrack. Ah, the infinite wisdom of “The Hardest Part of Breaking Up (is Getting Back Your Stuff)”
It was probably me!…”Man you ever break up with a girl and she takes all your stuff? What’s up with dat?! I don’t know man…Something wrong…Something wrong with dat!”
and the rapping!
“You plus me, it doesn’t equal us. You took my car, now I gotta take the bus.”
AH I wish I still had the CD. This sounds hilarious.
Oh wait, that’s what YouTube is for! Unaccounted listening of crap music.
Michelle, I will burn you copies of both the movie and TV series soundtracks.
Glad I wasn’t the only one who was in LURVE with these guys. Btw I think this was a show and not just a movie. Right?
The only thing I took away from this article is that “The Munsters” was only on for two years? Reruns were always on when I was a kid (in the ’80s, thank you very much!) — I feel like I’ve watched at least 100 episodes of that show.
Wikipedia says there were 70 episodes. That a lot of episodes for 2 season. Why don’t Lost/Breaking Bad/Mad Men follow the 1960′s plan of 35 episodes a season?
At least they don’t follow the plan of some UK shows and have maybe only 10 episodes (at the most). Why must you toy with me, awesome British television!?!!?
Wow, so I wasn’t that far off!
$$$
The liars should leave Butch Patrick Alooooooooone!
(Meant to sound like a wolf howl)
Sorry.
Not to be a Debbie Downer but when Gabe said “[Ed. note: He said, from his house in Pennsylvania, where he lives now, all of a sudden, with this lady]“, it was actually a quote from the lady. Unless they switched names somehow. Sometimes that happens with old people, right?
My childhood crush and the man I hoped I’d become approve of this fairy tale come true.
She’s pretty.
Agreed, Steve Winwood. So agreed.
Remember how demure she would act when he was acting all sleazy? That drove me wild when I was a little kid. I was a sleazy messed up little kid.
Remember how she used to speak French to instigate him? And he would lose all composure and start kissing her arm. Then she’d just raise an eyebrow — and he’d plead, “No, don’t stop, keep talking!”
And sometimes, she would.
Yeah. This was my favorite show when I was 7 because of that.
BREAKING NEWS 2GE+HER FANS! Chad looks like this now:
CRUSH OVER.
let’s try this again!
BREAKING NEWS 2GE+HER FANS! Chad looks like this now:
CRUSH OVER.
interpol’s paul banks