Photos
The worst part about last night’s episode, besides the fact that it was mostly boring and drama-free and and didn’t actually take place in New Jersey and didn’t even have that many good quotes in it (although Snooki’s “I feel like a pilgrim from the friggin’ ’20s” was top-shelf stupid) was the weird insistence on this being a real thing? Not only is it 2010, an era where most of the world knows how reality TV works (thanks, Joe Millionaire), but the people on this particular show have already been on this show before. Like when everyone kept saying “JWOWW called me up and said we should road trip down to Miami,” or whatever? Or when Angelina (gross) said that she was talking to DJ Pauly D on the phone and he basically invited her? Two lies in a lie pod. Both of those things were created by television producers, which is fine, that is their job. But I don’t think anyone would have complained if JWOWW and Snooki just got into the car without explanation and drove down there. Be safe! And if it’s true that DJ Pauly D and the Situation invited Angelina (it’s not true) they should have just not done that. Angelina’s the worst! On a cast of worsts!
The best part of the show was how despite the show’s popularity and the sudden and widespread fame of the cast-members, they still live in the shittiest house I’ve ever seen with three children’s beds from K-Mart smooshed together in a room painted by a lunatic. Ha. Also, it’s amazing that this show has become such a cultural touchstone, and yet not a single corporation is actually willing to align its brand with these goofs. Cool Takers trailer, though. Oh, and I also really liked the part when they yelled at each other. It just goes to show, you can take the cast of Jersey Shore out of New Jersey, but you can’t take the them yelling at each other while kind of laughing in the car on the way to the nightclub out of the cast of Jersey Shore.
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Maybe Snooki means “pilgrim” in the John Wayne sense of the word. That would make slightly more sense, I guess?
Or maybe she’s cleverer than the lot of us and actually meant 1620…
Snooki 1
Everyone Else 0
Her accent was a combination of Western and cockney, so that works.
The constant use of the word “You’s” will amuse me through at least the first 3 episodes. Right you’s guys?
Also, did anyone see Obama on The View talking about how he doesn’t know who Snooki is? Okay, I hope not, but did anybody receive word that that did, in fact, happen? LIES!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m_kXObWOp5U
Where’s Kenneth Starr when you need him?
Yay! Amy Pond!
What is this, that Dr. Who thing?
She’s pretty.
Maybe because he knows her by her real name Noelle or whatever that walking pumpkin nightmare’s name is. They’re really tight.
Walking pumpkin? Hilarious! My wife wanted to get our baby a pumpkin outfit for Halloween, but screw that! My baby is going as Snooki!
I think you mean NICOLE. “Sheesh!” – jerseyshoregum.
Obama is just mad because Snooki called him out on the tanning bed tax…No duh!
Which doesn’t make much sense, since he uses the tanning beds himself:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2008/nov/06/italy-barackobama
tanning-tanning is like rape-rape.
I didn’t watch the premeire, but I did watch some of the first season for the first time yesterday at the gym(that’s right, the GYM!), and I was surprised by how boring it was. It wasn’t even interesting enough to distract me from how much I hate exercise.
But were you concomitantly tanning and laundering?
Man that was dope when Ronnie was living it up at the end. All those pent up emotions just pouring out of him like Eric Bogosian’s speech at the end of Talk Radio.
But yeah… Last season for sure.
I’m sorry I have to…
This made me
and was such a clear example of how scripted this show is. Now that we ‘know’ the characters, they needed to create more drama for us. Like Ronnie going back to his creepin roots and hurting Sammi, and having Vinny sleep with Snooki and Angelina. Even though this show is a garbage train horror show, at least last season seemed a little more real. This season is going to be awful(er).
Nice.
Anyone else think Ronnie’s shirt design made it look like he was sweating profusely in a geometric pattern?
I thought it looked more like he was wearing a light blue hoodie that was falling off one shoulder because he was so drunk. And stupid.
My favorite part of JS is how the Situation is always going on about his crusade against “grenades” when, based on his face and the fact that he likely has at least 3 STDs, he is basically Captain Grenade.
The Situation’s penchant for pushing his own catchphrases reminds me of the press tour Jim Carey did for Ace Ventura: Pet Detective. Alllllllrightythen!
One of my favorite things about last season was how even though The Situation acted like he had to fight women off, I don’t recall him actually ever sealing the deal with any of them. He’s all talk. Maybe the dude should take a grenade every once in a while.
That is exactly what I love too! He talks about how much game he has and he never scores. Even Vinny who until seeing the previews for this season, we had no reason to think he had anything going for him, hooked up every once in a while.
Actually, he’s clearly (see image on left) Captain Boring of the S.S. Shut Up. No Duh!
I had no desire to watch this show, but knowing that there were so many awesome jokes I didn’t get until near then end of the season last year, I had to tune in.
Also, I think the crappiness of the house is what makes the show better than, say the Real World. Sure its fake reality, but it’ll be fun to see the guidos bring home ‘grenades’ and try to get with them in their race car beds. The thing I hated the most about the show last night was that they all drive Escalades! where are the beaters? This is not the Jersey Shore I know!
I’m ready for these people to get caught on a live mic speaking in that thespian English accent discussing the poor quality of tea on set but then again I am firmly grounded in reality and realize it will, sadly, not happen.
I’m convinced this whole show is the grand opus of Improv Everywhere.
I liked the part when Sitch and Pauly’s car got stuck in the mud. That was the most interesting part.
“Who does AAA call when AAA gets stuck?”
The Situation just blew my mind.
WHO WILL SHAVE THE BARBER???
No kidding! Good thing I had my totem (a platinum cross necklace) on hand to keep track of reality.
The musical cue for the kick will be LMFAO’s “Shots”.
My totem is my own abs.
I don’t have cable therefore did not have the necessary means to view the “Jersey (but actually Miami) Shore” premiere. But I feel as though I know exactly how it went down via Facebook Status update.
and i quote:
“OH NO RONNIE DIDN”T JUST CALL SAMMI THAT”
“Angelina is such a skank”
“Snooki’s actin a FOOL!”
The end.
and more than likely, a preview for the entire season.
C’mon Gabe. Amanda Bynes came out of fake retirement to make a movie (Easy A) to sponsor this priemere.
Sammi: “I just feel like, I don’t even know.”
Snooki: (immediately) “I know how you feel.”
I’m sorry, but that’s just totally correct.
When the Situation informed us about land mines along with grenades, it brought the show to a whole new level.
His concept of the metaphore is impecable.
One of the highlights was when The Situation goes, “MIA – that’s Miami”. Thanks, I’m glad we worked that out.
Damnit, I missed these crazy kids.
He’s just making sure the people watching who aren’t as smart as him can still understand what’s going on. You know, like people in coma’s or ones declared braindead from a car accident or something.
I find it funny that the only company that DID advertise was GM. Additionally, all the cars the castmembers drive are GM. So there you have it: GM, Out of bankruptcy and still making fantastic decisions.
The Situation came to a bar in my town. I guess the owner knew his cousin or something? Anyways, you could do body shots off The Situation for $50. That’s a lot of money! Apparently he got really drunk and started shouting, “NONE OF THESE GIRLS ARE HOT.”
And then he threw up.
yeah that sounds about right.
Snooki says Obama like she really means N-word.
O-ba-MA!!!!
My favorite part was when Sammi was having her inarticulate breakdown about Ronnie in the car and Angelina just had to open her mouth and make the equally nonsensical interjection:
“Wait, are you talking about guys? Something something last summer something bitch something boyfriend.”
Angelina is basically the Pete Best of Jersey Shore. #morelikepeteworst
I feel like we’re at the cusp of a schism in the JS fanhood: Those who believe accept only the first season as entertainment trash gospel, and those who accept the second (and presumably third) seasons. Or is this less like religion and more like canon?
Is Jersey Shore: Season 1 to Season 2 what Star Trek The Original Series is to TNG? I should stop talking now.
I hope the True Blood re-caps will be back next week! They’re the only reason I watch that double stupid show.
Seriously! we need the TRUE BLOOD re-caps!! first thing I do Monday morning is check to see what’s been written!!!!
Yeah!! it was boring and dull as well.
Muscle Morph