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Uh oh. Have you guys heard of Kyrah? Apparently, she is the new Ke$ha. I mean, Ke$ha is already the new Ke$ha, and one would have hoped the only Ke$ha. But now there are two of her. “Don’t shoot, I’m the real Ke$ha.” “Don’t shoot, I’m the real Ke$ha.” “Better safe than sorry!” (Double gunshot.) Here is how the Sun UK describes her:
SHE’S got the sound to rival BRITNEY, the looks to rival a PUSSYCAT DOLL and the cheek to rival PARIS HILTON.
Haha. Yuck? I don’t think you could have a more unappealing description of a woman without the help of SCIENTISTS. What a cool artist. In the article linked above she tells lots of really neat stories about how sometimes she has been in the presence of people who are actually famous. One time, Paris Hilton got her kicked out of a nightclub! Cool! Another time, Hugh Hefner SAID SOMETHING TO HER! The only thing more interesting and awesome than that story is Kyrah’s music video:
Uh oh is right. (Thanks for the tip, GoldenFiddle.)
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You’re being really inappropriate right now, Mom.
Kyraaaaaarrrrrggghhhhhhh make it stop!
Shouldn’t it be I< Y R /-\ I-I ?
NoL K¥rah
That’s supposed to read:
No: K¥rah
I’m actually not attracted to this woman at all.
fake steve winwood? gay steve winwood?
NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
You know she’s a fake because she doesn’t call herself K¥rah
Dang again!
She’s my new favorite artist!
Shes my favorite new robot answering machine/ singing into a fan artist too!
All the upvotes. Back and forth. Forever.
Damn you, gif! Damn you to hell!
Oh lilbobby tales, always trying to get us to visit your website, creepygif.com
And I thought I was so subtle about it, too.
I liked this song better when Ke$ha sang it
(I didn’t)
If Tik Tok was a dumbed-down version of The Party by Uffie, this song is The Party sent through Google Translate a few times.
/ continuing a personal tradition of leaving Uffie-related comments on every Ke$ha post.
Holy hell, what is that from??
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Italian_Spiderman
You really do know your gifs! I just looked for the most terrified one I could find. Because this.
Thanks, werttrew! I knew I could count on you!
I made it 14 seconds… I just can’t. Nope…can’t do it.
I made it a few seconds longer only because I thought she looked like the stepmom on Reba… No? Not that I expect any monsters would stoop low enough to watch reruns of Reba.
I made it 41 seconds. I need a goddamn medal. (And she does look like a slimmed down, younger version of the stepmom from Reba.)
” I don’t think you could have a more unappealing description of a woman without the help of SCIENTISTS.”
Howabout it, scientists?
“You ask the IMPOSSIBLE!”
-Scientists
“Do you mind if I finish plugging this whole in the ocean first, or is your thing more important?” -Scientists
Our thing.
You know how sometimes you can look at someone and just kinda guess what they smell like? That just happened and I didn’t like it.
urinal cakes and sadness?
the free clinic?
i think i’m starting to become a misogynist. every day a little bit more of my feminism withers and dies and is replaced with this horrible dead rage at women. i think i need to go back to smart girls at the party for a bit.
I know! The worst thing is, that I just KNOW that their are girls who consider this toilet music* empowering in some disgusting way, because they’re owning their grossness. I mean, I like to drink and fuck, and I understand the whole idea of owning it, but not knowing who you woke up next to is not something you want to own! Neither is hepatitis.
*Literally. She’s on a toilet for half the damn video. “It’s a statement about how I won’t conform to your standards of feminine!” It’s a statement about how I want to FLUSH YOU DOWN IT.
I thought it was about how, even when you’re evacuating your bits, you’ve got to be corseted and extension-ed up and ready to screw strangers.
Quick, Southernbitch needs 20 cc’s of PJ Harvey, stat!
If that doesn’t work, we may have to set up a Carrie Brownstein drip!
I have no idea what I am talking about.
Kathleen Hanna transfusion?
Annie Clark-dectomy?
she’s pretty
A Neko Case-plasty?
i’m gonna take this is my fist and smash the patriarchy!
I don’t know what an “Annie Clark-dectomy” is, but I wouldn’t mind seeing the brochure.
Hey, come on, don’t direct your hate at womankind. Mankind. All of it deserves your dead rage. We’re all terrible!
Is this a new artist or just a music video Patti D’Arbanville back when she was on New York Undercover in the early 90′s?
So that’s not Megan McCain?
Not gonna lie, when I saw the thumbnail, I thought this was about one of the Housewives of Wherever.
Also, Tardy for the Party >>>>>>>>>>>> This
Seriously, how old is she? This is some Benjamin Button’s shit.
So where does “Money Can’t Buy You Class” fall on that spectrum?
She’s on a toilet…can we just take a second and….she’s on a toilet? Of course she’s on a toilet.
seriously… why does anyone want to be filmed writhing around a bathroom stall? it’s not like she’s the first one to use a bathroom in her music video, but stop using cameras in the bathroom people.
-ocd rant over
I’m just going to go ahead and change all the preset radio stations in my car to NPR so I never have to accidentally hear this song again.
Be careful with that. NPR already did their remix of Lady Gaga’s telephone:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4KenS0h3-Pc&feature=player_embedded
I wouldn’t be surprised if Ke$ha & K¥rah were next.
Aw! First, “Telephone” is a much better song than this. Second, that is super cute! Isn’t it always cute when people you believe to be nothing but sober, businesslike voices on news radio let a little loose and do a parody video of a popular dance jam?
The only time I would expect to hear this song on NPR is if they’re doing a piece on how these women are ruining it for all other women.
No, I would still rather listen to this than Car Talk.
Aww… Car Talk is the best! I wish those guys were my uncles.
I second this! As a kid I HATED Car Talk, but now that I know more about cars and hilarious uncles, I love it!
I already have an uncle who talks nonstop, but his accent is Newark and he mostly discusses politics. Also, kind of a casual racist, but what 60-year-old white dude isn’t?
No they’re not as bad as Rush Limbaugh. Still if I never hear them again it’ll be too soon. I feel similarly about Garrison Keillor. Old white men should be seen and not heard.
I agree with you about Garrison, though his main fault is how loudly he exhales right into the microphone. It is so loud! Gross!
I don’t like Car Talk, I don’t like Garrison Keillor and I don’t like listening to NPR. If my choice on a long car ride is silence or NPR, silence wins.
I never understood the appeal of that show. They just talk about cars? Is it as popular as I’ve been led to believe? I tried listening to a podcast of it recently to see if I was missing something, but I didn’t make it very far in because they just talked about cars.
In 20 years it will be artistic outro music.
“What the hell is ’1, 2, 3, 4?” They’re numbers, Kyrah.
Congrats (is that the right word?) on getting farther into the song than me, THAT IS A GEM.
Fucking numbers, how do they work?
– K¥rah
“Is there something here that we need to discuss” I swear to god I thought she was bout to say something about the morning after pill
I scrubbed through. Did anyone notice that half the time she’s butt-dancing on top of a toilet in a bathroom stall that looks like a set from a Saw film??? What’s the symbolism there?
That her career is starting – literally – in the toilet? So confused…
“Don’t shoot, I’m the real Ke$ha.” “Don’t shoot, I’m the real Ke$ha.” “Better safe than sorry!” (Double gunshot.)
Between this line and the new Pogo video coming out, I’m all smiles today. Hooray for Wednesday!
No doubt — LLOL with this line (literally laugh out loud).
Is it just me, or when she sings do swarms of undead turtles fly forth from her mouth in a blood-soaked rage?
Awwww Beaker!!!
that was awful enough for me to emerge from my months-long comment hibernation just say how awful it was, possibly only to retreat back to hibernation
Best new song of the decade! I didn’t listen to it, because I’m on a conference call at work, but just judging from her picture, and all the comments about toilet dancing (HOT!) I’m guessing this is right up my alley.
Hello? It’s dark in here. Please someone help me.
Are we absolutely positive this isn’t Ke$ha? Maybe the Sun UK has a Kyrah/Ke$ha – truck/lorrie thing going on here.
*lorry. Singular. Blimey!
at least Ke$ha seems like she could be fun. Kyrah is boring boring. and Ke$ha’s way cuter (there i said it).
“SHE’S got the sound to rival BRITNEY, the looks to rival a PUSSYCAT DOLL and the cheek to rival PARIS HILTON.”
Wait…that’s a compliment?
i guess we’re living on Planet Kyrah (by antichrisis)…http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sx5DGDIamGU
or maybe this Planet Kyrah by the band Kyrah, who takes their name from that first Planet Kyrah
kyrah ain’t the only confusing kyrah in town…http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=97hssH7-4NM
Did anyone else notice she said she woke up at 6 after a one night stand? She didn’t specify if it’s 6 AM or 6 PM, but either way that’s a little ridiculous. Now, I’m no Kyrah, but 6 AM seems pretty early to be waking up after such a night. And 6 PM seems really late to wake up from anything, except maybe the flu. She probably has the flu.
http://tinypic.com/m/alp9bn/1
I gave it my best try.
YAY! I helped.
Thanks, friend.
But I thought the BP Oil Spill was the new Ke$ha…?!?
If only Kyrah was able to pay ALL OF US a fiver to listen to that song:
http://www.popjustice.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=4788&Itemid=206
Ke$ha and BrokeNCYDE take note.
VG I’m going to cheer you up RIGHT NOW.
That’s right.
Frank FUCKIN Lapidus to the rescue. AGAIN.
Hi, Lapidus!
A Ke$ha rip-off? Does that make her a reverse Uffie?
Don’t worry, wish-karp, I get this joke.
its only fair that the uk has someone as terrible, because WE WON THE WAR
This just reminded me. I recieved a junk mail message today trying to sell me life insurance from a website called “Rainforest Quilts” .com. And I was like, wow, that sounds like a very trustworthy and reputable place to buy insurance from. Good insurances I’ll take 5 of them!
Fool. It covered freezing jaguars.
I could stop listening to the National in order to watch and listen to this video. I could. I could even have listened in-between switching from the National to Calexico. I could have.
Didn’t that Cheetah Girl already do a song about how sexy rape is? Note: I didn’t make it past 14 seconds so I’m just guessing that’s what this is about. That or constipation.
But the sex was spectacular!
(I’m really sad that I know what you were talking about.)
This text is
scratchedout!she is NOT the new Ke$ha! Ke$ha has a symbol in her name…uhhh….Ke$ha likes Jack, and Kyrah likes vodka…uhhhh…Ke$ha likes Mich Jagger and Kyrah cheats on her man….TOTALLY not the same!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7l2b9vZTHJ8&NR=1
“I was born that way, I can’t help it.”
Sorry, Kyrah. Not an excuse.