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This is a terrible advertisement for what is probably a middling vodka. I mean, I’m no Professor Vodka, so maybe it’s great vodka. I just kind of expect Bruce Willis to invest in a controlling stake of middle-of-the-road vodka. Dan Aykroyd style. “Instead of putting my run-of-the-mill vodka in a bottle that’s shaped like a crystal skull, I’ll just mumble some self-involved nonsense about it in an ad that looks like an undergraduate film student’s final project.” You know that he and Diddy were sitting around the waiting room of some alimony lawyer’s office, and Diddy was like “you’ve got to get a vodka, Bruce Willis,” and Bruce Willis was like, “I don’t know if I have time to get a vodka. I’m trying to get the old blues band back together.” And Diddy was like, “I didn’t know you were in a blues band,” and Bruce Willis was like, “Yeah, I’m really passionate about it,” and Diddy was like, “That is hilarious.” (Via Vulture.)
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That commercial was absolut-ly horribly.
ruined it with my typo.
Upvote for effort!
The most obvious benefit of Bruce Willis vodka is that the bottle is Unbreakable. So why not go the Whole Nine Yards and just buy some? Look Who’s Talking about this stuff! Everybody is, that’s who! Eleven out of Twelve Monkeys agree that Bruce Willis vodka is the best. You can even give it to The Kid, it’s so good! But if you DO give it to The Kid, you’ll probably go to jail and Die Hard. So don’t do that. Underage drinking is not cool, guys.
You’re doing a good job of Hudson Hawk(ing) this
If you two keep moonlighting like this, the pun won’t stop.
And furthermore, I’d say my mercury was rising, but my sixth sense was vodka, and frankly, it was my gorge rising.
Like, um, barf, in my mouth.
*like,um,a barf armageddon, in my mouth*
Damnit!
That sounds like a pretty good Breakfast of Champions to me!
Guess that makes me comment Lucky Number Slevin in this chain!
Four Rooms, The Fifth Element, The Sixth Sense, Lucky Number Slevin, The Whole Nine Yards, The Whole Ten Yards, Twelve Monkeys…Why does Bruce Willis like numbers so much?!
Also, Ocean’s Twelve. Seriously, what’s his deal? Good for you, you can count! Let’s move on!
a barfmageddon?
Sure, this vodka is great when you first start drinking it, it’ll be with you through some great times, but eventually it will undergo a massive package-redesign and start gaining popularity with 21 year-olds. Before you know it, these young jackasses are coming over for christmas dinner because they like like the vodka as much as you, but they’ll never really appreciate it.
Save yourself the heartache and stick to Smirnoff.
racist great advertisement, please sign me up for all the crates of all the bottles
Yeah, I hate when those mega-rich Polish companies hire American movie stars and put them in commercials, only to stereotype them as self-absorbed pricks.
in their defense, it is pretty hard not to.
He got the idea after watching Surrogates and thinking to himself “damn I need a drink”
Why hire Bruce Willis to promote your vodka if you’re not going to have him demonstrate its usefulness as an improvised incendiary weapon?
Sobieski? Like, LEELEE Sobieski?
It’s probably a pretty good vodka — until you realize it’s been dead the whole time you’ve been drinking it.
i would be more worried about my vodka being alive, i think.
I’m more exicted that he and the Enforcers* are getting back together.
*I have no time to look up what his real blues band name is.
He’s just trying to compete with Marilyn Manson’s absinthe, Mansinthe. http://www.mansinthe.com/
What was his second idea?!!?!
You know what I was wonderin’? How anyone could think that Bruce Willis will help them sell MORE vodka. This commercial makes me want to quit drinking forever.
Bruce Willis vodka- distilled from the tears of the guy sitting next to him
Not to be Dr. Vodka or anything, but this is actually a pretty great vodka that is super-cheap. Like around $15 a handle cheap. I mean, the one job vodka has is to not taste like anything, and Sobieski does the job well. I mean, what do I know, I’m just a guy who runs a site where people send me bottles of booze to drink (and like 4 Sobieski shirts, 2 coasters, and a shaker, but who’s counting?), but for realz, it’s actually good and cheap, Die Hard sweat aside. YIPEE-KAY-YAY, VODKA-FUCKERS! (I’ll see myself to jail, KTHNX)