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The second season of The Real Housewives of New Jersey begins tonight on BRAVO, and for the first time in Videogum history, we are putting an IMPORTANT DECISION in YOUR HANDS: should we recap this show? Or should we spend our lives doing things that are enriching and rewarding and make us better human beings?
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I vote no, there are better shows to recap. Breaking Bad maybe?
I competely agree, Steve Winwood! Come here you big lug.
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Do you have any more gifs of her?
What happen to the Treme recaps?
Thirded.
Wait a second, I think that girl might be smoking. That’s a turn off. I’m not sticking my tongue in ashtray mouth
For god’s sake no. Take Birdie for a walk instead!
OR let Birdie take you for a walk instead!
Miles Says
MorewalksBabytakedatBirdoutSonTeachemaSitorsumpin
TRUMPET
I’ve never watched an episode of any Housewives show. And I never read the recaps.
I say recap more videos of cats doing funny things.
New weekly feature “What’s up with Maru?” (Boxcat to you plebs.)
Can we recap Party Down instead???
YES!! I vote Party Down. Or Treme, whatever happened to Treme since we acknowledged that it was not, in fact, The Wire?
Problem with Treme recaps is I am waiting for it to be available on netflix so these recaps would leave me out till then and I think my participation is important enough to be a deciding factor, frankly
Hell yeah. The only Roman I want discussed on this blog is DeBeers (yes, I had to look that up), not Polanski.
But recapping Party Down makes no sense. It’s not an event-driven show, really, and it’s good! What is the point, unless it’s something like LOST that is both good and VERY event driven?
Dramaticstructuregum.
meh
As a New Yorker, I implore you: BLOG THOSE REDNECKS.
also as a new yorker, i implore you: stop giving those women the attention they crave. if we all stop watching and/or recapping, they won’t stop being awful. that’s crazy. but at least we will all get to stop hearing about how awful they are.
This sounds like the least worthwhile recap project of all time. I vote for recaps of That 70s Show. They don’t make it anymore, but of course, it remains popular in syndication.
I vote no. Instead, you should recap the first season of 21 Jump Street!
Or some other show that will similarly be an Accidental and Horrifying Time Capsule of It’s Era Which Though Recent Is Seriously Bygone. Like MacGuyver. Or that detective show where it was Loni Anderson and Wonderwoman. Or Knight Rider. I will think about this. Ideally it would be a show that had credibility in its day, and in our day is ridonkulus.
Retrogum! we need Retrogum! C’mon Gabe you have like 70 years of TV watching under your belt!
Do 21 Jump Street one week
Twin peaks the next
Doogie Houser
St Elsewhere
McGuyver
Dallas
Twilight Zone
All them shows from “brilliant but cancelled”
Etc.
ALF
Battlestar Galactica — the original (or, dear god, “1980,” where they find earth, and have super powers because the gravity is less than what they’re used to?)
Incredible Hulk
How about just the “serious” episodes of every sitcom: “Tonight, on a very special Diff’rent Strokes / Growing Pains / Webster / Silver Spoons…” (I am assuming they all had a very special episode; the only one I really remember is Gary Coleman in the bike shop.)
DO IT DO IT DO IT. What else are you recapping, anyway? If it gets too unbearable, stop! That’s part of having agency in our own lives, right? Starting dubious projects, discovering they’re awful, and quitting? Or starting dubious projects, discovering they serve some purpose in our lives, and continuing. Either way I say, Yes, please.
DO IT DO IT DO IT.
recapping good shows is BORING “this good show was well written and i liked it. man what a fun time i had watching a quality piece of entertainment.” NO. i come to this website specifically to ride the nightmare train. next stop: real housewives of new jersey
“I don’t agree with what you are saying, but I will fight to the death for you to say it.” – Danielle Staub, probably
Agreed! Real Housewives, please.
Know why the Gossip Girl recaps are so good? Because that show is the effing worst.
YES. I am on board with this suggestion!
Long time lurker, first time commenter. I agree, the worst shows = the best recaps. Do it!
hear hear! i want nightmare gifs!
As long as it doesn’t interfere with Top Chef recaps (season 7 coming soon?). I vote yes.
I vote “when applicable,” as in when something too good to miss (watch what) happens. The recaps were great (hi, Gabe! I read them!) but it’s not worth your time to have to describe the flimsy storylines and vodka-fueled motivations. Just show me when someone pulls off someone else’s wig or installs a perpetual mimosa machine.
I don’t know if you just invented Perpetual Mimosa Machine or if that is something real, or something from RHNJ, but that made my day. The people I know who wouldn’t buy the two handed Great Sword, would invest in the Perpetual Mimosa Machine. I like to keep my acquaintances very balanced.
I don’t care either way, but I do love recaps. So if you stop recapping this one would you start recapping something else in its place?
How about you start recapping that week of Full House episodes when they went to Hawaii?
As funny as you are, Gabe, your recaps of this show will never be so entertaining that I can forget that I’m reading about The Real Housewives of New Jersey. And that’s not an insult to your writing, because you’re the funniest blogger I read, but there’s only so many ways to call a person a horrible human being before I actually start to feel sad for humanity that people like that exist.
Yes! I miss your Real Housewives recaps! It’s just a shame that you haven’t been covering the Real Housewives of New York this season.
I vote yes. the best recaps are the ones you love to hate.
Thirty helens agree.
I miss KITH.
No. Don’t bother.
Less hate-watching. More love-watching. We’re all miserable enough as it is.
i prefer love-watching too… wait what?
I agree. It is time for love to lift us up where we belong.
NO. The promos for the 2nd season make it look unwatchable. These women aren’t backstabby friends like ATL or NY, they are enemies and frankly, that’s boring. I will also pre-vote no on Season 2 of the Jersey Shore.
What about a pre-cap of Jersey Shore Season 2? I think we can guess what’s going to happen.
If you are requesting the yeas and nays: Nay
If you are requesting semi-anonymous input: I feel like Real Housewives o’ Jersey will go the way of
GossipGarbage Girl. The shows have just become so batshit and stupid that they are now just trying to be more and more batshit and stupid for their own sakes. TheGossipGarbage Girl recaps (which, admittedly, I rarely read) seem to get less and less comments which I interpret as less interest from the other Monsters due to the show’s gargantuan terribleness. I feel like that same is likely true of RHoNJ. However, I’m sure the best way to bring in new readers/Monsters/ppl to click on adverts is through recaps of popular shows that will appear in Google searches (maybe, I don’t know, I’m not a e-blog-conomist) and above all else: we want to make sure Birdie gets fed.note to self: make use of term “gargantuan terribleness.”
MORE BIRDIE, LESS BRAVO!!!!!
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I guess people thought I meant no for Birdie? I was talking about the question asked “Should we cover Housewives of Jersey this season?” which I voted no.
I love Birdie. Only Steve Winwood could be so heartless to not love Birdie.
NO. MORE BIRDIE. MORE PARTY DOWN. LESS REAL-BLAH-BLAH-BLAH-ANYTHING
But I’m sure you will be funny either way. But, also, NO!
This picture was taken minutes after the ending of the last season of Real Housewives NJ:
[IMG]http://i41.tinypic.com/24flfyw.jpg[/IMG]
You are a parent now Gabe. Think of the children and their fragile doggie minds.
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God, Steve Winwood, I get that you’re trying to be funny but comments like that are just ugly to look at.
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RECAP HAPPY TOWN:
a) It has the potential to turn out to be at least as hillariously bad as Gossip Girl, with SO MUCH EXPOSITION
b) Secrets!! Mysteries!! Wacky people doing wacky stuff!! Dr Alan Grant being creepy!! Lost-heads will love it, no matter what!!
Oh no, as a serious Lost-Head, I have to say that I couldn’t sit through the Happy Town pilot, and wouldn’t want Gabe to even try. It’s trying to be a very, very, VERY, poor man’s Twin Peaks (complete with a “Blue Door” instead of “Red Room”– Agent Cooper would not be amused).
Maury recaps plz.
Easy: None of them are the father.
Betty White
I see what you did there.
Yes please, and thank you for your consideration.
YES
please god!
side note: i recently quit my job at the law firm to start working as a line cook (brilliant i know!). i haven’t been able to comment at all recently because work was the only place i could get on the internet (sadly, i am poor and cannot afford a comcast connection of my very own, which removes me from the world of both the tv and the internet.). if gabe doesn’t re-cap desperate housewives for me how will i receive nene’s sage advice. “close your legs to married men.” actually the point of this side note was to point out how i’ve taken this very rare opportunity when i have the internet at my disposal to comment on videogum. i do this, as opposed to working on one of the two twenty page papers i have that are due tomorrow i have put off this entire semester, because i truly care about the ultimate race to the worst (also known as real housewives of any city/county in the united states of america)!
Upvoted because Boobz
more like Real Snoozezzzzzzzzz’s of Snooze Snoozerey. Right?
No.
I’m just concerned for your health, Gabe. You’re exposed to so much human toxicity as it is with all the other stuff you regularly post for us. Adding New Jersey is just one too many trips to the suntanning booth. We don’t want you to get soulmelanoma.
YES YES YES YES YES YES YES.
SEASON 2 OF THIRTYSOMETHING!!!!11!!!!1!!!!!!
Hey guys, I got a great idea for tv show recaps: Gabe can do recaps of Web Soup and Tosh.O because those shows are basically highly paid versions of what he does. Am I right? Douchey hipsters in one size too small t-shirts acting snarky about stuff they find on the web.
JUST KIDDING! Videogum is somhow the opposite of those shows somehow in spirit, in some subtle way that I am not smart enough to explain.
i’m going to assume that “highly paid” means “dental coverage.” i’m pretty sure nobody is getting rich writing balls jokes for web soup.
Not talking about the hack “writers”, talking about the exec douches who drive around in their convertibles with their blue tooth cyborg ear pieces talking about synergy
I don’t know. Ask this guy:
i love that even when voting “NO,” all the monsters are careful to reassure gabe that it’s not his writing, it’s the awfulness of the show. because as a 200 year old [i think i have that right] man, gabe’s entire self worth is based on what a lot of self-described monsters on the internet think. you guys are almost too sweet. probably though, i am too much of an asshole.
p.s. i vote NO again. loudly. strongly. and vehemently.
I’ve never watched a single episode, but I consistently Hugh Jackman my pants while reading your recaps. The Housewives summaries are among your best!
Unless, of course, we can replace them with different recaps of equal potential. There are very few shows I watch, and with summer coming, I don’t know what to recommend! Can I suggest Big Brother 12? That show is all kinds of uh-oh! My summer drug, every year.
Mostly all of us in favor said “please.” Surely politeness counts for something in this world.
Please YES. I remember the warm feeling I got in my stomach everytime there was a NJ recap last year. C’mon, does no one remember Gabe’s crush on Dina? It’s riveting!
I think we should revisit the Housewife M/F/K. We should see how we have all grown over the years. Do we feel any different about M/F/K ing these women?
Uh, if you don’t find RHNJ life enriching, then we are not watching it in the same way.
Uh, if you don’t find RHNJ life-enriching, then we are not watching it in the same way.
ruh-roh.
No.
Please don’t recap Jersey Shore Season 2. Let’s all just try and forget it even exists, just forget about it.
I can do that for you right now:
“The housewives once again proved that they are all grotesque harridans who need to be put to sleep with their entire families, after which their properties in total should be consumed by flames.”
There.
That being said, seasons two and three of THIRTYSOMETHING (which are both now available on DVD) are not going to recap themselves.
Um, excuse me, need I remind you of Real Housewives of New York City…?
uhhh, that was supposed to be a response to Godzilla Got Busy, but OKAY INTERNET.
As a proud, born-and-bred resident of the fine state of New Jersey, please for God’s sake NO .
If this show was only shown in New Jersey, it would be hilarious because the people on it are so blissfully unaware of themselves and the rules put in place by society. However, because it is shown outside of New Jersey and has the words “New Jersey” in the title, people automatically assume that a majority of people from NJ are actually trashy, inconsiderate pricks who smell like a male stripper’s gooch and drink Heineken and Jager like it’s water from the Holy Grail. And those assumptions are truly the bane of my existence. I seriously have no sense of humor about my state. Sure, make fun of me for being an arrogant, ignorant, backwards American or a drunk Irishman. But if you touch my status as a New Jerseyan, by God may all the glorious fury of Bruce Springsteen rail down upon you.
For good measure:
Nasty old bitches argue about nonsense during a long, expensive lunch.
There, I just recapped the entire Real Housewives Franchise.