Last night’s episode of The Simpsons featured a Ke$ha lip-dub tribute opening credits sequence for some reason:
So, does this mean that we’re done with The Simpsons? Please?
Look, no one loved The Simpsons harder than me (not entirely true). I wore my Bart Simpson “Cowabunga” t-shirt until it was so hole-ridden and stained that it was more like a Bart Simpson “Cowabunga” hand towel (I kind of wanted the Bart Simpson “Eat My Shorts” t-shirt more, but I knew that my mom would not find it suitable attire for a GENTLEMAN). But, look, I am turning 65 this year. I don’t know how much longer I can keep doing this. All I want is for this show to exit gracefully so that I can know peace before I enter the next life.
And what is this anyways? And why is this anyways? Is the Ke$ha opening credits an attempt to win a whole new audience of young people to the show? That would be reasonable enough, I guess. It would be like that episode of Gunsmoke when the Sheriff of Dodge City was played by Joan Jett. But Ke$ha? KE$HA? Did Matt Groening lose a bet with a 14-year-old? I’m just not sure the world needs a The Simpsons: Next Generation that is designed to appeal to Ke$ha fans. I’m not sure the world needs anything to do with Ke$ha whatsoever. At the very least, if they wanted to appeal to younger viewers without alienating human beings with brains and eyes, they could have done an opening credits lip-dub tribute to Cobra Starship. (Just kidding.)
No, I’m pretty sure this means we are done with The Simpsons. Bye, The Simpsons! I will continue to not have watched you in years!