[In this feature, we periodically check in to see what is up with Topher Grace.]
Have you guys seen David Mamet’s leaked memo to the writers of his since-canceled military procedural, The Unit? It is pretty great. For one thing, the whole thing is in ALL CAPS, which is just another word for TOTAL SANITY. Seriously, there is nothing that I love more than a memo (or Kanye West blog post) written in ALL CAPS. Coffee may be for closers, but ALL CAPS ARE FOR MADMEN. Anyway, the memo is actually an interesting exploration of “the craft of writing” (not to be confused with The Craft of Neve Campbell) from a very successful practitioner. Personally, I’m not a big fan of David Mamet. I love Glengary Glenn Ross, but for the most part he is way too stylized for me. When it comes to dialogue and characterization, I’m more of a Kenneth Lonergan type, myself. But you should read the letter (here). It’s got some great advice, my favorite being the reminder that if you are writing a scene, you should always have this question at the front of your mind: “WHAT HAPPENS IF HER DON’T GET IT?” Hahaha. What if her don’t get it, indeed, David Mamet.
“A writer must always raise the dramatic skirts I MEAN STAKES.” — David Mamet, probably
Speaking of a master craftsman at the top of his field with wisdom to offer, what is up with Topher Grace?
Do you even have to ask? The Predators trailer is out!
Man: the most dangerous game! Actually, I guess this movie means that Predators are the most dangerous game. But the second most dangerous game is man! I like that the Predators know what Yakuza are. They are nothing if not thorough in their research. Now, if you are like me, then you probably were a little frustrated that there was not more Topher in this. At the very least, I want to know what his special skill is that has brought him to the murder planet! There’s Black Ops Navy Seals and death row murderers, and then there is Topher Grace. My bet is that his puppy dog eyes can break your heart. In any case, I’ve pulled every Topher moment, so that his work gets the attention it deserves (FINALLY).






There he is. Very cool. Very Topher.
Speaking of Predators, the MTV Movie Blogs caught up with Topher at SXSW (oh, so, another thing that is up with him is that he was at SXSW), and found out this juicy detail about the movie:
“I ain’t got no time to bleed!”
Jesse Ventura spoke those unforgettable words in the 1987 sci-fi/action flick, “Predator,” starring Arnold Schwarzenegger. Now, more than 20 years later, we’re going to get to hear that line again, uttered by someone else in a different, yet similar, context.
“Predators” hits theaters on July 5. This time around, a group of battle-hardened people from different walks of life are kidnapped, only to wake up on a distant alien world, prey trapped inside a massive hunting ground for the titular alien aggressors. Star Topher Grace confirmed to MTV’s Josh Horowitz at South By Southwest last weekend that the memorable phrase does indeed make an appearance.
“That line is in the film,” he said. “It was so much fun to work on; this movie is so kick-ass. It’s all in-camera, there are very few special effects; it’s really, really cool.”
While Grace didn’t pin the line to a specific actor, the likely candidate is Walter Goggins, star of FX’s completed series, “The Shield.”
Check that out, you guys! An ENTIRE ARTICLE devoted to an unidentified character in a sequel ham-handedly reusing a movie quote from a previous installment in the series. JOURNALISM! It’s weird that the New York Times is even still in business when we have the MTV Movies Blog. In any case, I can’t wait to find out who says that line in this move that is definitely going to be so kick-ass. So in-camera.
Meanwhile, Alex Chilton died last week (R.I.P.) and obviously the Internet did its best to honor his memory. One site, chartattack.com, made a list of the 12 Reasons Alex Chilton Was Cool and you might be surprised who makes an appearance:
7. A whole new audience of fans was introduced to Big Star when the Chilton-penned “In The Street” was covered by Cheap Trick for the theme of That ’70s Show. In light of the current careers of Ashton Kutcher and Topher Grace, it remains the one truly great thing that sitcom had to offer this world.
Hey, chartattack.com, way to use the death of Alex Chilton as a way to get your jabs in at Ashton and Topher. I’m sure he would have appreciated it. The 13th reason he was cool was because he loved people taking digs at others in memorials.
Meanwhile, a blog called the portastylistic has BREAKING TOPHER NEWS!
But ask him what project he’s most excited about and he’ll happily tell you: a TV version of St. Elmo’s Fire he’s producing for ABC. “The first draft of the script just came in. I talked to [That '70s Show co-star] Ashton Kutcher a bunch about it, because he has a lot of TV-producing experience.” Grace stops, reflects on how far he and his friend Ashton have come, and laughs. “And you know, his wife was in the original!”
This is the first we have heard about a Topher Grace-approved St. Elmo’s Fire update. But we will obviously stay on top of this story AS IT DEVELOPS. It’s like The Wire: Season 5 over here!
And, of course, That ’70s Show remains popular in syndication.
There you go. That is what is up with Topher Grace. Send your Topher tips to tophergracenews@videogum.com. See you next time!
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I’ve been a member of this site for quite a while and I’m still not confident I know who this guy is….
Are you kidding???!!! It’s motherfucking Eric Foreman!
Omar Epps = Eric Foreman, Topher Grace = Eric Forman.
I hate to admit this, but I’ve never noticed that before. I will humbly accept downvotes.
Does someone end up explaining this every week?
I’ve been explaining this all my life.
(I’m 6 years old, apparently.)
Ahhh, I got schooled. Much respect for knowing that, chameleon_street.
Topher Grace is the force that balances Kei$ha
I’m British, and I don’t watch TV… In fact, all my TV ‘knowledge’ comes from this website. I’m a cheat.
This guy knows what you’re talking about.
This is a silly thing to write here directly on the Topher Grace compendium. Look up! He’s the guy in the new predator movie, and also the guy who was at SXSW!
I really hate it when famous lines from a film are re-used in its sequel. The “I’ll be back” in Terminator: Salvation made me gag. I’d like to thank MTV Movie blogs for pre-warning me of this particular occurance
I’m a little strapped for time so is it okay if I bleed later?
Great move
“I talked to [That '70s Show co-star] Ashton Kutcher a bunch about it” I’m glad they informed who Ashton Kutcher was since I was confused
(That’s your) responsible journalism!
Topher: The Most Dangerous Grace
…under fire!
(gross, I am gross.)
Did you hear that? MTV news called him a *Star!*
You’ve really made it, kid.
Hidden due to low comment rating. Click here to see
… but not grammar.
Yes, but how many buttz did he sux this week?
Topher suxxed approx. 1,000,000 buttz this week.
so do we get to start a “and then he had to get his stomach pumped” rumor now?
As a Professor of Psychology* I wonder to myself who this mysterious Topher-abuser really is.
Perhaps Gabe, driven insane by adoration for a distant, unreachable celebrity like TG, has created an alter-ego at which he can spit bile at the man who unknowingly scorns him. Like some Internet Gollum, a second personality has manifested itself within Gabe, hiding amongst the commentors, feverishly cursing Topher, despising yet idolizing him.
(*I am not a Professor of Psychology, and I am talking utter bullshit.)
I prefer to believe he’s not anyone’s alter ego at all. Just someone who is really dedicated to his cause.
He does have a little sister according to Wiki. That’s who I’ve always assumed this is. A la:

THAT IS A SCARY PICTURE
Is that Amy Poehler?
Yeah, she used to play Andy Richter’s lil sis on old episodes of Conan.
Topher sux buttz. Amirite?
You are so right! This is what I’ve been tryin’ to school y’all on! TOPHER SUX MONDO BUTTZ 4 REALZ!!!!
LOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOO
LOLOLOLOLLOOOLOLLOLOL
LOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLLOLOLO
OLOLOLLOLOLOLLOLOLLOLOLOLO
OLOLLOLOLOLOLO
OLOLOLOLOLLO
OOLOLOLLOLO
[somebody had to do it]
Yes, I’m sure Topher’s pause was him reflecting on how far he and Ashton have come (and totally not how old his friend’s wife is and the humor pertaining to that fact).
What kind of guy do you take Topher for? He would never have such unpure thoughts
Nice try, Adrian Brody! There are no pianos on this planet! Get it? I made a reference to The Pianist, that movie that feels like it was made millions of years ago…
Oh yeah, but Topher’s great too! I noticed you forgot a scene where Topher’s face appears Gabe. I decided to help adding some artistic revisions of course:
You’re welcome!
I hope Adrian Brody dropkicks a Predator.
Wow, somebody got it!
Okay granted I know nothing about the new predators movie and have not watched the trailer (computer issues, not b/c I’m trying to be difficult), but is it really the non-comedy version of bio-dome combined with that ace ventura movie?
when will we hear of topher’s on-set romance with a predator?
In the “That 70s Show” opening credits, you can tell that Topher’s the type of guy who’d appreciate Big Star. While Ashton, et al. are like, “We’re so excited about being on this show and grooving to this fun song for the opening credits,” you can see in Topher’s eyes that he’s thinking, “The undercurrent of wistful melancholy that Alex Chilton added to this song really hit on something that this Cheap Trick cover lacks.” He probably even said to his costars, “Seriously, you guys, they were a great band. You should check out ‘Third/Sister Lovers’. It’s pitch black, man, but so weirdly moving and deep and beautiful. You won’t be the same after you listen to it.” Then Laura Prepon was all, “Relax, nerd,” and Topher went and suxxed some buttz.
he then added “i also find it odd that they removed the lyric ‘i wish we had a joint so bad’ and yet they regularly show us hanging out in clouds of smoke. i suppose it’s the explicit rather than implicit reference to marijuana that the network is concerned about but it still rankles me.” topher grace: freedom of speech activist, recreational pot enthusiast, and all-around thinking man’s thinking man.
What’s Up, is that this is opening on my birthday. Chicago-land Monsters, my dream is that we will assemble for this and I can call it my BBDE (figure it out). Seriously, Videogum: Chicago Drift should happen.
Bad Books Don’t Exist?
best birthday dalliance ever
we ARE planning a Thursday, April 8th meetup to coincide with the VGUM BDAY BASH in the NYC.
CHICAGO STYLE MONSTAHS – More Deets are pending, but me and Shellbomber are figuring it out.
Did anyone see the article in the NY Times about Birdemic? Our own Gabe Delahaye is heavily quoted!!1! You make-a your momma proud, bambino.
http://www.nytimes.com/2010/03/25/movies/25birdemic.html?hpw
Uhhhhhh Peephole: The Perverted? We’re gonna need a bigger brain hospital for planet earth.
Wow. Mamet just outlined everything I love and hate about films and TV shows. Nice! PS Spanish Prisoner is his neglected classic. Steve Martin is the best.
My favorite part about the Mamet rant is when he lets us know what the penguins think of us:
OUR FRIENDS. THE PENGUINS, THINK THAT WE, THEREFORE, ARE EMPLOYED TO COMMUNICATE INFORMATION — AND, SO, AT TIMES, IT SEEMS TO US.
Dolphins are less demanding, they just need fish.
PUT. THE CAPS LOCK DOWN. CAPS LOCK IS FOR CLOSERS ONLY
Even ask this brings an insurmountable amount of shame on my family.
BUT if literally everyone else who gets teleported off to behead station is some kind of bad ass, could this mean that Topher Grace wasn’t really supposed to be in this film, and is only in this film to pander to the massive “Whats up with Topher Grace” fan base? I would like to think that The new “RAH IM A MAGICAL INVISIBLE MONSTER AND YOUR DEAD” movies producers wouldn’t steep so low….
Also i’m bad at making the words look right on the shiny computer screen. (That means he sucks at grammar-Jeff Foxworthy.)
I’m sorry but despite all the great Tophernalism, I cannot get over the mention of The Craft because I LOVE THE CRAFT.
I’m guessing you were 13 around the same time I was 13? My friend’s grandparents actually sent her to religious school in 1997 because she watched it too many times.
Count me in! My friends and I even assigned each other characters that we were most like from the movie… One friend insisted on being the crazy Fairuza Baulk character and I was somehow surprised when she later turned out to be a psycho whore in real life, too.
Ha, me too! That is one terrible movie that I will stop everything to watch if I see that it’s on TV. I wish I could say that I was 13 when it came out but that would be a lie.
Just a quick question, when has “Robert Rodriguez Presents” been the stamp of excellence? Anyone?
SharkBoy and Lavagirl 3-D, no duh. PAH!
Team SharkBoy.
“We’re going to get to hear that line again, uttered by someone else in a different, yet similar, context.”
And the Pulitzer goes to… (that’s how they do Pulitzers right?)
topher was in my town for sxsw?!??
my first thought was, why didn’t i stalk him? my second thought was, HOW? oh god twitter duh! then i realized if topher grace had a twitter, vgum would already be on that shit.
#topherontwitter
“TNT knows drama” – David Mamet
OK, this is off-topic. Sorry.
Fellow Monsters. The video I directed for Ted Leo and The Pharmacists is on Videogum sister site (older brother site?) Stereogum today. I am very proud of it. If you would be so kind to check it out and tell me what you think, you’d fill my little heart with so much joy.
http://stereogum.com/314511/ted-leo-the-mighty-sparrow-video/video/
HOLY SHIT This is awesome TL – You gotta direct my music video – me and DavidCXR are gonna do a videogum edition of TV Party.
Haha, awesome! Thanks!
Nice work!
Thanks! I like your avatar. That’s one of my favorite music videos.
Great job, that is an awesome video! If my band ever makes a video with us actually in it, I hope it looks this cool.
Great job, T.L.! Fun video for a very good song. The end made me think of Pierrot Le Fou.
Thanks!
I was thinking of making a Beavis & Butthead inspired profile called Tophersuxbutts’buttsux and making my avatar Tophersuxbutts’ butt with a a smaller butt and then creating another profile called Tophersuxbutts’buttsuxsuxbutts with an even smaller butt, then Tophersuxbutts’buttsuxsuxbuttssux, and so forth, ad nauseum.
But I’m kinda lazy.
I can’t upvote this enough.
thanks for letting me know where Topher was in the Predator trailer, I tried but I could not find him. Now I know. Educationalgum
Apparently I’ve been drinking the TG Kool-Aid, because a few nights ago I dreamed that Gabe posted Topher’s cell phone number on here, and I texted him, and he texted me back, and we started this weird, witty texting relationship. And when I’d get a text from him, my phone would say “Topher Grace” because I have to distinguish between the other Tophers who are stored in my cell phone (?). Anyway, FML, MLIHWUWTG.