This is a trailer for a “movie” that someone is supposedly making called Dimitri The Lover about that dude who left the voicemail message heard ’round the world. NSFW language, so headphones UP.
The second worst part about this, after the part where that dude actually exists, is the fact that no matter how gross this “movie” (and I am still not convinced that the word “movie” really applies here, nor am I convinced that Dimitri didn’t make this himself) makes him look–no matter how much of a Real Life Sex Criminal who belongs in Actual Goblin Jail–you know he is so proud of and so PUMPT for this. Like, here is a sample conversation:
Dimitri: They’re making a movie about me, man.
Friend: Sure, Dimitri, but the movie depicts you–pretty accurately–as an oversexed, obscene, genuine human nightmare who is despicable.
Dimitri: Whatever, bro, are there any movies about you?
Friend: Well, no, but there are also movies about Hitler and Hurricane Katrina. I am not convinced that having a movie about you automatically makes you a good thing. In fact, especially when it comes to documentaries, there is a long tradition of making movies specifically about the horrific things that no one–
Dimitri: –I’m probably going to choke to death on pussy I’m so fucking famous right now.
Friend: I can never remember why we are friends.
Word for word, probably. We really need to be more careful about feeding the nightmares, World.






























Ugh, this guy is a real life nightmare. He torments the women of Toronto, and if you turn him down, he yells at you and calls you a lesbian. Made for Hollywood!
I didn’t even watch the video, this guy makes me so angry dkflsj so I don’t care if what I said is redundant.
Canadagum! Yay!
i am one of the women he has called a lesbian, its so true when i get off work and see his face on the subway i for sure am a lesbian for the rest of my commute home. i WISH i kept the buisness card…believe me if dimitiri teamed up with joel……..oh i cant even think of it.
The Mystery is gonna be sooo pissed when he hears about this…
in all seriousness- i was on that show that mystery did…the hookup artist? i live in Austin and worked at a store where “Mystery” took all his little babies there to get make-overs. it was the worst.
He also sullied the sacred ground of Spider House Cafe. Solidarity.
He’s like the Martin Luther King of real life sex criminals who belong in actual goblin jail.
I think this MLK meme has gone really far enough. Thanks.
Well then I’ll be the MLK of the MLK meme. Sheesh.
You’re like the James Earl Ray of killing memes.
And where’s your green text, jerk?!
I got rid of the green because people thought I was either a hippy, a pothead, a troll, or a confounding dunderheaded idiot.
The green hasn’t really altered any of those opinions (FACTS!) but it has ceased to offend eyes.
But don’t think I’m done with my new tag toys.
Just remember, it’s not gimmicky when it works.
And I got mad love for KajusX, I just don’t like where this ginger kid is taking us is all I’m sayin.
One Love
i think “One Love” sort of encompasses all those things people might think you are from teh green text.
No worries, of course, DS3M.
My attack was merely for show and was constructed with fake irateness and indignation.
It’s like MLK said:
“This is beyond nuts, boss.”
“I’m the Travelocity of Pussy.” A better sentence has not been uttered.
I like RRUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNN
I can’t wait for Tommy Wiseau to play him in the inevitable biopic
Haha, “movie.” This makes “I Hope they serve beer in hell” look like “Breathless”
Godardgum! Yay!
Dimitri le fou?
I’ll show myself out.
This guy is channeling Tony Clifton. No way is it real.
This guy is really real. And really horrible. You know when you think:”That’s so horrible, I hope it’s not true?” He is that thing that you were hoping wasn’t true.
The man playing me (cause I am a dude, so I AM THE BOYFRIEND) in this sexy little biopic is going to jail, clearly, but I think he may be breaking the rules and passing go and collecting $200. Eyes out.
You’re doing it wrong!
You guys need to cool down you are so not being elegant right now
RESPECT THE COCK! TAME THE CUNT!…NO HOMO
This guy is a character.
I was JUST about to say this.
“Society is going to have to deal with what they created.” I can speak for society when I say, Jersey Shore came after you, so don’t put this on us.
I think Frank “TJ” Mackey has plenty of grounds here for copyright infringement. This is just a cheap Seduce and Destroy knockoff.
I have to admit I did laugh when he told that random guy he was going to be eating pussy later. This has T14TT written all over it.
“Hey, you’re beautiful. Wanna help me work out my mommy issues? Oh shit, did I say that out loud again!?!”
This guy is pissed he didn’t get into “Brief Interviews with Hideous Men.”
there is officially too many people using the term artist to describe… not work as such but whatever being a manipulative borderline sex offender (pick up artist?) is.
UGH UGH UGH is anyone else feeling harassed through the computer? If Wanda Sykes’ Theory of Detachable Pussy were actual, this is the kind of thing that would make me put mine in cold storage. For a long time.
This guy isn’t hiding anything. His favorite pick-up line might as well be, “You want some ice cream, in case there are no gay people there?”
Here he gives his opinion on the metrosexual Jude Law:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4JJXIUM0lZw
I like his intricate, insightful views on feminism:
“A woman’s biological calling is to be gang-banged on a daily basis.”
I saw this pop up a year or so ago. Listen to the entire voicemail message. It’s incredible.
Here’s the whole story.
If your name is James Sears, why Dimitri. Is there is a stereotype that Greek men are suave? But that’s a minor issue. This whole thing makes me sad.
IS there a stereotype that Greek men are suave??
I’ve been doing it wrong!
Haters! You guys are totally just jealous of all the pop-pop Dimitri is having with the elegant sluts of the world!
The mere fact that you call sex offending “pop-pop” tells me me you’re not ready
WHAAAT?! He said I was the only one! I’m soo embarrassed.
I think this guy is a videogum reader. From his website: “ABC: always be coming on. always hit on women.”
I just wanted to point out that this guy is very real. He has an apprentice named Pavel (The Lover) who approached me and my friends at the subway. I wish I kept his business card, but he did state he was a graduate of Dimitri’s school of picking up women. So shit just got grosser because theirs MORE THAN ONE OF THESE GUYS.
Calliwell i second your comment. he hit on my friend on the subway, i already knew of him and told her to stay clear…acutally i whispered “its dimitri the lover” then he got mad and said i was angry lesbian who was jealous that he was hitting on my friend and not me.
and he was right – how does one resist that greaseball hair and spencer rice voice?
He internet stalked some friends of mine. The man is a walking nightmare made of the tears of terrified orphans.